You've Got Mail: A Cautionary Tale

Chapter 39 — Fire Cannot Be Wrapped In Paper, Unless They Were Paper Lanterns

Edited by DancingDolphinsYo

Finally, Wu Xingzi did manage to find the owners of all the pengornises other than the second place on the list of pengornises. Adviser Wu was too drunk to remember its brutal murder at the hands of the General, and so it was logically passed over.

With a darkened expression, Guan Shanjin glanced at Rancui with a sneer. “They say that the Pengornisseur, even through a thousand miles, can help one seek their beloved. Seems like the rumours are all false.”

“We can’t be blamed for those people who do not seek their beloved, but sleep around carrying their embroidered pillows1.” Rancui deliberately sighed loudly. He looked towards the slightly blushing Wu Xingzi who was in a good mood, his words laced with meaning, “In my opinion, Adviser Wu is not the type to like embroidered pillows. After all, pillows should be simple and lasting. Those are then considered good pillows.”

“Yes, yes.” The pillows in Adviser Wu’s home were all made by himself. Every autumn, he would replace the rice husk within. The firmness of the pillows was perfect, there was no worry of dirtying them, and they even smelled good.

Seeing how easily Wu Xingzi fell into the trap, Guan Shanjin was both unhappy and resigned. He hurriedly finished the letters, and after instructing Rancui to deliver the replies to the branch in Bastion City, he stood up and hauled Wu Xingzi away.

His actions were so fast that Rancui did not even have the time to say his goodbyes. Pressing his palm against his chest, Rancui grabbed the brush that had not even dried yet and threw it into the brazier.

This brush was a gift from his boss, and it was made with elder wood and weasel hair by a famous expert. The body was smooth, and the longer it was used, the better it would get. Rancui had been using it for seven years, and its body was so smooth and shiny that it could almost be used as a mirror. Carrying it, it felt weighty and comfortable, and it was one of his beloved items.

However, since Guan Shanjin had used it, with Rancui’s temper, he disdained ever using it again.

“What a waste of a good brush…” Rancui stared at the brazier, soothing his own chest. He was unable to distinguish if he felt more angry, or if his heart ached more. Only when the entire brush had been consumed by the fire, the flames licking upwards, did Rancui tighten his fists firmly, and summoned his employee over. “Immediately return to the capital, and help me tell this to Boss.”

“Yes.” The salesman was a little confused. If there was something to be reported, wouldn’t sending a letter be better than sending someone over? The one thing their Peng Society had no lack of was homing pigeons.

“Tell him that this is what Manager Rancui has said: ‘Fuck you! Today, if I’m in the Peng Society, there won’t be Guan Shanjin, and if there’s Guan Shanjin, I won’t be here! You ass, talk for you is cheap, but I now have two members who have fallen in Guan Shanjin’s hands! This sort of heartless, unfeeling person, the Peng Society can’t accept. If you can, just do it yourself! You motherfucker, I’m going to go to Bastion City now, there’s no need to send me off.’” Rancui’s voice was bright and clear. He was usually mild and tactful, weighing his words before he spoke. Even towards his subordinates, he was gentle and polite. The salesman had worked for Rancui for over seven years already. He had never heard an awful word from Rancui before, not to mention vulgarities. Manager Rancui had a quick tongue, and when he wanted to scold a person, he had never needed to use any curses and swears.

The vulgarities had spewed out from Rancui as though he was reciting a poem. The salesman froze there for quite some time, before picking his ear stiffly, and he asked with a shaky voice, “M-manager, Ah Heng didn’t manage to hear what you wanted to tell the boss clearly… Did you really say something about a mother…?”

“I did say it, you didn’t hear wrongly. Remember, you can’t have one word more or less when passing the message, and you have to say it exactly as it is to the boss, understand?” Rancui naturally knew that sending a message through the pigeons would be much faster, but that would not allow him to vent his anger! He could already imagine how his boss, after seeing his letter full of vulgarities, would be laughing loudly, unbothered. His boss would then tell his lover, “Look, Rancui this child has grown up already, and he even knows how to swear now.”

Just thinking about it made Rancui so angry that his body hurt. If not for being concerned about Wu Xingzi, he would most definitely have returned to the capital to scold him himself.

“Get the employees here. Send a letter to the Bastion City branch. Tell them that I’ll go over tomorrow, and tell them to get ready.” Did this mean that he was going to abandon the Goose City branch for the Bastion City branch? Ah Heng mopped at his sweat. He was naturally not stupid enough to ask the manager why he was doing this. It was definitely to be a thorn in General Guan’s side, and also to find a suitable opportunity to rescue Adviser Wu if the occasion arose!

Only the manager in the Peng Society would put in such great efforts for its members. It was truly due to Manager Rancui, and that was why the Peng Society had grown to how it was today.

“Manager, Bastion City is a dangerous place. Aren’t you afraid that General Guan will use underhanded means towards you?” Ah Heng was very worried. Guan Shanjin was the local tyrant of Bastion City, and with just a crook of his finger, he could secretly do away with Manager Rancui. Even if their boss had the ability to save him, he was beyond his reach!

Fed up, Rancui grumbled, “Just let him come at me with his underhanded means!” With Guan Shanjin’s extremely conceited character, Rancui was definitely a thorn in his side. If he really followed them, no matter what his intentions were, Guan Shanjin would definitely beat him up. His only worry was that all General Guan could think about was Mr. Lu who was about to get married, and leave Wu Xingzi aside, ignoring him. In that case, Rancui would definitely have to take Wu Xingzi away.

All in all, it was all the fault of his boss for giving him so much trouble.

“Did you remember everything that I’ve said?” Rancui drank some tea to calm himself down. Looking at Ah Heng, he gave him another instruction. “Remember, you have to repeat every single word correctly to the boss. He wouldn’t punish you.”

The boss would not, but the boss’s lover might! Ah Heng looked troubled, but he could only nod and agree. A jade pendant was suddenly shoved into his hand, and he looked straight at Rancui, only to see the manager waving him off. “That’s a present that he gave me. When you’re passing the message, just hold this jade pendant up. No one will dare touch you. After delivering the message, come to Bastion City to look for me. Don’t waste a single moment of time.”

“Ah Heng understands.” Finally relaxing, Ah Heng hurriedly stored the jade pendant on his body. Following his orders, he retreated to start his preparations.

Once Rancui finished arranging the matters in Goose City, he headed straight for Bastion City.

As for Guan Shanjin, after dragging Wu Xingzi away from the Peng Society, he did not return straight to Qingcheng County, but brought the old quail to the Restaurant of Songs for a meal.

Having rolled about in bed for the past few days and eating only a meal in the morning before the trouble happened, according to Wu Xingzi’s appetite, he definitely was both hungry and tired. Since the issue was finally settled, Guan Shanjin was in no hurry to head back, and so he might as well give him a good, proper meal.

Naturally, it was not to compete for favour with those lifeless pengornis drawings.

Now that the matter of the pengornis drawings had been exposed, Wu Xingzi was a lot less self-conscious. With a bright smile, he had an extra two bowls of rice, and ordered two more dishes and a soup. Only when his stomach was full and bulging, did he put his chopsticks down in satisfaction, thanking Guan Shanjin sincerely.

Although he was unwilling to speculate about the real meaning behind Guan Shanjin’s actions, it was already enough that he could protect his pengornis drawings and even bring them along with him to Bastion City.

After the meal, the two people strolled about the marketplace. Goose City was extremely prosperous, and people were now already making preparations for the Spring Lantern Festival. The lantern market was now bustling as well, and there was a large crowd, with many things that could be eaten, drank, and toys that looked very interesting. Wu Xingzi had never explored the lantern market before. As a child, his father was strict, preferring the quiet to the crowd. At the very most, they would just light a lantern for the occasion. When he grew up, he was single and alone. He found this sort of festival, where families gathered to walk through the marketplace, awkward. Since he happened to be both poor and shy, his interest in going to the market also waned.

As it was his first time, Wu Xingzi found everything entertaining. Guan Shanjin naturally was willing to accompany him from the first stall to the last. Afraid of Wu Xingzi getting squeezed by the crowd, Guan Shanjin shielded him between his arms with his stature of a general, completely ignoring the probing eyes of other passersby.

As they walked down the street, one by one, the lanterns were lit.

The lanterns in Goose City were not as lavish and exquisite as the ones in the capital, but they were delicate and adorable. The broad street of the lantern market was lined with all sorts of lanterns. There were the palace lanterns, the revolving lanterns, and the designs ranged from birds and flowers, to rivers and mountains, to the Eight Immortals, to words of luck and many others, too many to count.

“Ah, look! It’s a revolving lantern with the Eight Immortals.” Wu Xingzi exclaimed, his eyes filled with delight.

That revolving lantern was exquisitely made. In a sea of lanterns that looked comparably simple, it stood out prominently, hanging high up on a tree. Where they were standing was also a little away from the crowd, a peace amongst the bustle. The few people walking by were all couples, intimately entwined with each other.

Guan Shanjin looked at that lantern, as well as the person under it, and his expression contorted slightly.

Wu Xingzi was coincidentally dressed in white today, and his winter clothes had bulked him up a little. However, due to his originally thin figure, he looked a little more plump now and was even better looking. His face, with a smile upon it, looked ordinary and commonplace. He had a fleshy nose and plump lips, his philtrum was too short, and his forehead was too narrow. His eyebrows were sparse, and together with his round little eyes, he looked adorable when his eyes curved in delight, but when he was frozen in thought, he looked just like a foolish quail.

Such a face like this, there was nothing that resembled Mr. Lu’s luminous, flower-like face.

Still, when Wu Xingzi was dressed in white, standing under the tree while gazing up at the revolving lantern, Guan Shanjin felt as though he was looking at that Mr. Lu from the Spring Lantern Festival years ago.

Dressed in light colours, Wu Xingzi looked refined and graceful, tranquil and content. If Mr. Lu was the soft and luminous moonlight, Wu Xingzi would be the brook reflecting the moonlight. Guan Shanjin was unable to obtain the moon in the sky, but he could pick up the reflection in the water. As such, he tightened his arms, embracing the person within tightly.

“Haiwang?” Feeling the arms around him suddenly tightened, Wu Xingzi flushed red, unconsciously lifting his arms to try pushing him away. However, he was sorely lacking in strength, and Guan Shanjin had a knack of trapping him. Struggling and panting, yet unable to gain even an inch, Wu Xingzi could only lower his head to hide his face, preventing others from seeing him and laughing.

“What’s wrong? You’re getting shy again?” Looking down at Wu Xingzi, Guan Shanjin smiled. He stroked the tip of Wu Xingzi’s nose lovingly, yet was unsatisfied with just that, so he gave him a kiss. The old fellow burned red with embarrassment, and even his eyes filled with tears. “No one will notice us, they’re all admiring the lanterns.”

“Oh?” Wu Xingzi quietly raised his head, swifting glancing through the crowd. As expected, the couples drifting about were either looking up at the lanterns, or they were just like Guan Shanjin and him, hiding in a dark corner, wrapped up intimately in each other’s arms.

Although Wu Xingzi was still feeling shy, he finally relaxed. He allowed Guan Shanjin to continue caressing him, hugging him as they finished viewing the rest of the lanterns, before they reluctantly left the lantern market.

It was already past 7 when they were back in Qingcheng County. Wu Xingzi had originally wanted to visit Auntie Liu to wish her and her family a happy new year, and to present them with some gifts that he bought at the lantern market. However, looking at the time, it was probably too late. Farmers woke up early, and they were all preparing to go to bed around this timing.

Wu Xingzi contemplated for a moment and decided to go to Ansheng’s place instead. During the entire New Year period, no one in Qingcheng County would run their business, except for the largest teahouse that would reopen on the tenth day of the New Year. As for the rest of the stalls in the market, they would only open for business after all fifteen days of the festival had passed. During these days, Ansheng was rather free, and the magistrate’s office would also officially reopen after the fifteen days as well. If Wu Xingzi were to visit, he would not be disturbing Constable Zhang’s rest.

Having made the decision, Wu Xingzi told Guan Shanjin about it, implying that he should go home first so that Ansheng and Constable Zhang would not feel awkward.

Guan Shanjin naturally refused. He held tightly onto Wu Xingzi’s hand, and after leaving his horse in the stable of the magistrate’s office, he insisted on Wu Xingzi leading the way.

With no other choice, Wu Xingzi could only bashfully bring Guan Shanjin along for the visit. Now, both Ansheng and Constable Zhang were even more sure of their relationship.

There were a few times when Ansheng tried talking to Wu Xingzi privately, but he was continuously blocked by Guan Shanjin.

Seeing it happen a few times, Constable Zhang too was not very happy about it. With a dark face, he glared at Guan Shanjin. If not for Wu Xingzi, he might have even thrown a punch or two.

As such, Wu Xingzi was unable to stay for a longer visit. He hurriedly delivered his gifts, and promised to go to the stall to have some jellied bean curd the next time he returned, before he was dragged away by Guan Shanjin.

“When we visit Auntie Liu tomorrow, you can’t be like this.” On the way home, Wu Xingzi warned him, getting a little angry. He kept feeling that something was wrong with Guan Shanjin the past few days. Guan Shanjin seemed to be deliberately preventing others from coming close to him. Why?

“Mn.” Guan Shanjin acknowledged him casually. With his arms around Wu Xingzi, ignoring everything else, he kissed him. Only when Wu Xingzi was panting and became teary-eyed, did he then lick his lips in satisfaction, before peeling himself away.

“After seeing Auntie Liu tomorrow, let’s go back to Bastion City.” Guan Shanjin gently caressed Wu Xingzi’s kiss-swollen lips.

“We’re going back so quickly?” Wu Xingzi was a little hesitant. He thought that since he was going to be away for quite some time, he would definitely have to bring with him his pengornis drawings as well as his father’s books. Although there would not be too much luggage, to come back in such a hurry and leave in a hurry, he was rather reluctant.

More than half his life was contained within this little house. Even though there was only him alone, it was still where he lived in peace.

However, he did not know how he could get Guan Shanjin to stay for a few more days. Mr. Lu would be getting married after the New Year, and there were only so many days left. It was understandable why Guan Shanjin wanted to quickly return to Bastion City to settle the marriage.

“Is there still something you need to do?”

“No, not really…” They arrived home as they spoke. Wu Xingzi looked at this little house, inexplicably feeling that it was likely that he would not be returning for quite some time. He shook his head, laughing at himself inwardly for thinking too much. “Haiwang, why are you willing to let Mr. Lu get married and start a family?”

This question came as a surprise. Guan Shanjin was caught off guard, and did not reply for a long while.

Instead, the person who asked the question was chattering away without thinking too much of it. “I can see that Mr. Lu likes you very much as well. By the way, it’s quite funny that I previously did not realise your relationship. It’s all thanks to Auntie Li’s words, that allowed me to understand.”

“What did you understand?” Guan Shanjin’s voice was hoarse. He had wanted to light the candle, but now his fingers were stiff, and he had completely forgotten what he had wanted to do.

“Hmm? That Mr. Lu and you aren’t just simply a teacher and a student! He’s your beloved, isn’t he?” Wu Xingzi blinked. Inside the house, it was very dark, and the moon outside was dim. He could not see clearly, and could only hear Guan Shanjin’s abruptly hoarse voice as well as his harsh breathing.

Feeling a little flustered, Wu Xingzi groped about, wanting to light the candle. However, his wrist was gripped tightly. The strength used was so great that it was terrifying, and his arm was almost broken. It was so painful that Wu Xingzi cried out, but the pressure did not abate.

“H-Haiwang, you’re hurting me, please, let go…”

“You know about it?” Guan Shanjin gritted his teeth so loudly that a grinding sound could be heard. The pressure that his grip was exerting increased further, causing the bones of Wu Xingzi’s wrist to creak, and Wu Xingzi cried out in pain. “Answer me! You know everything?”

“W-what do I know?” The agony made tears slip down Wu Xingzi’s face. His complexion was pale, and it felt as though his wrist would shatter in the next moment. Trembling, he pleaded. “P-please let go of me… It really hurts…”

“You know that…” I’ve only been treating you as Mr. Lu’s substitute? You know that I like Mr. Lu? You know that…

“So you’ve always been pretending?” Not only did Guan Shanjin not release him, he even dragged him closer to himself, inch by inch.

“Huh?” Wu Xingzi completely could not understand what he was saying. This sort of image would make Guan Shanjin soften in the past, but now, it only enraged him further.

So he had been using this sort of expression to lie to him? So it turned out that he knew everything all along? So he stayed by his side, was it because he had some other intentions behind that? All sorts of thoughts flashed through Guan Shanjin’s mind, but for some reason, it finally stopped on a pengornis drawing. Guan Shanjin first froze, and then, as though he was licked by flames, he quickly let go of Wu Xingzi.

Wu Xingzi was crying softly in pain, his body unsteady, as he fell to the ground. Fortunately, he was pulled into Guan Shanjin’s embrace just before he hit the floor.

Wu Xingzi gasped, quaking with lingering fear. The pain from his wrist could be felt all over his body, and he did not know if it was actually broken. Currently, he did not even dare to move it.

“What exactly should I do about you?” Guan Shanjin was unsure if this question was directed at himself or Wu Xingzi. Just now, he had been possessed by madness, and actually ended up hurting Wu Xingzi. Now, his heart was pounding in shock. Wu Xingzi was not a fool. Since those rumours by Auntie Li had already reached his ears, together with witnessing the interactions between him and Mr. Lu in Bastion City, he would definitely have been able to guess the situation.

So what exactly was the thing that made him blow up in rage? Guan Shanjin fell into a rare muddledness.

“I’ll help you massage it, don’t be afraid of me.” Guan Shanjin lowered his stature, his tone carrying a little pleading in it.

Wu Xingzi wiped his tears away. Nodding his head, he extended his hand towards him.

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