With My Profound Love, I Offer to the Years

Five years ago, Lu Lingchuan was actually the first person to discover Shen Nian collapsed at the entrance of the morgue.

Lu Lingchen would never forget Lu Lingchuan's expression at that moment. As he emerged from inside in a daze, he saw Shen Nian lying at the doorway, her blood staining her beautiful white dress red. The despair that he had barely managed to suppress was once again pushed to the brink of collapse by this cruel twist of fate.

He ran like a madman, carrying Shen Nian in his arms.

Some say that in a family with two children, if they're brother and sister, the brother will cherish his sister to death. If they're sister and brother, the sister will beat her brother to death, due to the dominance of blood ties.

Both of these situations existed in the Lu family. When Lu Lingchen was young and mischievous, he often broke Lu Lingrui's things, so he got beaten quite a lot. In contrast, Lu Lingrui was closest to Lu Lingchuan.

As the only daughter in the family, Lu Lingchuan also doted on this sister exceptionally.

As for Shen Nian, she was like an epiphyllum suddenly blooming in Lu Lingchuan's already perfect life. She didn't need to be dazzlingly beautiful; her cold fragrance and ethereal demeanor were enough to be stunning.

On that day, the three women Lu Lingchuan cherished most in his life all met with misfortune.

His mother, Li Mingshi, cried herself to death in the morgue after losing her daughter; his sister, Lu Lingrui, jumped to her death; his girlfriend, Shen Nian, fell into a coma and miscarried.

Multiple blows came in quick succession on that single day, crushing Lu Lingchuan, who was only 20 years old at the time, leaving him lying on the ground, barely breathing.

Lu Lingchen stood at the doorway, looking at the two people in the hospital room.

Shen Nian had just undergone a D&C procedure and was sleeping, while Lu Lingchuan sat by the bed, holding her hand, his head bowed, in a silence so profound it felt suffocating.

He was still covered in blood – his sister's blood, his lover's blood, his child's blood.

Feeling the gaze from the doorway, Lu Lingchuan's body swayed slightly. He raised his head, his bloodshot eyes meeting Lu Lingchen's.

He didn't speak, just silently tucked Shen Nian's hand back under the covers, then stood up, walked out of the hospital room, and closed the door.

Ignoring Lu Lingchen, he just kept walking forward, with Lu Lingchen following behind him.

His usually tall figure now appeared utterly alone, his once-straight back now bent.

"Brother," the 16-year-old Lu Lingchen called out, his eyes red as he demanded, "Why didn't Shen Nian take sister with her when it happened?"

"Why did she abandon sister?"

"If she had taken sister with her at that time, sister wouldn't have..."

Thinking of Lu Lingrui still in the morgue, Lu Lingchen felt a dull, intense pain in his chest.

Yes, he wasn't wrong to have such thoughts. Because from Lu Lingchen's perspective, Shen Nian was just his brother's girlfriend, while Lu Lingrui had been his sister for 16 years. Even though she had bullied him many times, Lu Lingrui was still the sister Lu Lingchen loved most.

His sister was still so young.

His sister was so sunny and lively.

His sister had such a bright future ahead of her...

But now, her life had been forcibly paused, her future mercilessly deleted.

How could he not resent?

If Shen Nian had taken Lingrui and run together at that time, would Lingrui have survived? If they hadn't gone down that alley, would they have encountered those two beasts? If they hadn't met those two beasts, would the lives of the Lu family, including Shen Nian's, not have been forcibly rewritten?

If only, if only...

For the victims, "if only" was just an excuse to escape reality, a fantasy born from the unbearable pain of losing their loved ones.

They couldn't control themselves, couldn't help but think, if it had been like this, if it had been like that, their most beloved person wouldn't have left.

But in the end, "if only" was just a hypothesis, and reality was reality.

"..."

Lu Lingchuan didn't respond to Lu Lingchen's accusation.

There was a convenience store in the hospital. Lu Lingchuan bought a pack of cigarettes and a lighter.

He walked to the landscaped area outside the hospital and sat on a large rock.

Lu Lingchuan had never touched cigarettes or alcohol before. This was his first time holding a cigarette.

He lit it and took a deep drag. The large amount of nicotine and carbon monoxide inhaled made him cough incessantly, but after coughing, he continued to smoke, then cough again, repeatedly torturing himself.

Smoking is indeed harmful to health, but it's undeniable that when emotions are on the verge of collapse, having a cigarette can soothe the nearly broken spirit.

It hurt... it hurt so much, the pain was unbearable.

He could only rely on smoking to comfort his aching heart.

Seeing that he remained silent from beginning to end, Lu Lingchen became angry. "We absolutely won't allow her to enter our house!"

Even though Shen Nian was also a victim, she was involved in the incident with Lu Lingrui. Now that Lu Lingrui was dead, every time the Lu family saw Shen Nian, they couldn't help but think of Lu Lingrui's death. It was mental torture.

"..." Hearing these words, Lu Lingchuan's hand holding the cigarette paused. Just as Lu Lingchen was about to rush over and grab his collar, demanding to know if he would choose family or Shen Nian, the cigarette in Lu Lingchuan's hand fell to the ground.

This was the first time Lu Lingchen saw his excellent brother so disheveled and wretched.

He sat on that large rock, curling himself into a ball in the most vulnerable posture, burying his head and sobbing.

"I'm going to lose her..."

"But I don't want to lose her..."

Lu Lingchen froze, his earlier anger completely dissipating.

It was at this moment that Lu Lingchen realized, after all that had happened, the most suffering person wasn't their parents who had lost a daughter, it wasn't him, it wasn't Shen Nian.

It was Lu Lingchuan.

For the rest of them, they had only lost one thing, but Lu Lingchuan had lost everything.

His sister, his lover, his child.

Left with nothing.

Some things simply can't be judged as right or wrong.

Like Mr. and Mrs. Lu, were they wrong? They were just a middle-aged couple who had lost their daughter. Was Shen Nian wrong? If she hadn't left at that time, there might have been one more person lying eternally asleep in the morgue now. Was Lu Lingchuan wrong? Apart from Shen Nian and Lu Lingrui, he was the one hurt most deeply in this tragedy.

No, none of them were wrong. The ones who were wrong were those two beasts.

They relied on their privileged backgrounds and connections to bully and hurt others with impunity. The Lu family, Lu Lingchuan, Lu Lingrui, Shen Nian – they were all pitiful victims of their cruelty.

Lu Lingchen had thought that Lu Lingchuan and Shen Nian would end their relationship there, never to interact again. But after Lu Lingrui's burial, Lu Lingchuan seemed to become a different person.

Before, he had been a very gentle person, to his parents, to his siblings, to his lover.

Now, he was expressionless, numb and indifferent.

Lu Lingchuan began his entrepreneurial journey, bringing Shen Nian along with him. Together, they climbed up the ladder relentlessly.

He was extremely demanding of Shen Nian. Even for tasks where 80 points would suffice, he insisted that Shen Nian achieve 100 points. His near-obsessive high standards for Shen Nian often made Lu Lingchen wonder if what Lu Lingchuan felt for her was love or hatred.

One night, after drinking, Lu Lingchen asked him, "Do you love Shen Nian?"

Lu Lingchuan held his wine glass, silent.

Lu Lingchen pressed on, "Do you hate Shen Nian?"

"..." He remained speechless.

Back then, Lu Lingchen couldn't understand why he couldn't answer such simple questions. It wasn't until many years later that he finally grasped the reason.

It wasn't that Lu Lingchuan couldn't answer; it was that... there was no answer.

For either question, if forced to respond, he would only nod, shake his head, nod again, and shake his head once more.

He loved Shen Nian. He didn't love Shen Nian.

He hated Shen Nian. He didn't hate Shen Nian.

Love and hate were separated by a hair's breadth. The depth of his former love equaled the intensity of his current hate. The root of hatred was love. If there wasn't even hatred left, that would be truly frightening, for it would mean love had ceased to exist.

The more he loved her, the more he hated her. He would rather be entangled in this conflict than walk away entirely.

Lu Lingchen once asked Lu Lingchuan what kind of person Shen Nian was.

Lu Lingchuan replied, "She's deeply sentimental, but also stubborn."

In truth, Lu Lingchen didn't have much interaction with Shen Nian. Before, he only knew her as his brother's girlfriend. After Lu Lingrui's incident, Shen Nian started working with Lu Lingchuan to build the business, and they rarely met.

It wasn't until the company took off and Lu Lingchen started an internship there after graduating high school that he had more opportunities to communicate with her.

It was then that Lu Lingchen realized how accurate his brother's description was.

She was indeed stubborn, stubbornly believing that Lu Lingrui's death was her fault, gradually crushing herself under this immense pressure.

Lu Lingchen vaguely understood why his brother had kept her by his side all these years. Perhaps it wasn't just out of hatred and unwillingness to let her go, but also out of a restrained love.

If Shen Nian had been left to continue blaming herself and spiraling downward, the consequences would have been unpredictable. By involving her in starting the business, expanding the company, meeting more people, and building more connections, they were able to step by step, personally send those two beasts to face the death penalty.

Lu Lingrui would forever be an unforgettable presence in Lu Lingchuan and Shen Nian's lives. Only by investigating and finding evidence themselves, ensuring that those who hurt Lu Lingrui faced the death penalty, could they alleviate their guilt and provide closure for Mr. and Mrs. Lu, who had lost their daughter.

In April, Lu Lingchen received a phone call.

Lu Lingchuan's voice on the other end sounded very off.

When he rushed over, he found him slumped on the carpet of a private room in a bar, surrounded by empty bottles.

He was leaning against the sofa, a piece of paper pressed to his heart.

Unlike before, he now knew clearly that being drunk could lead to mistakes, so no matter when or where he drank, he would only allow himself to get slightly tipsy.

But this time, he was drinking recklessly, trying to get as drunk as possible.

This was the second time since Lu Lingrui's death that Lu Lingchen had seen Lu Lingchuan cry.

He clutched a "Miscarriage Surgery Form" in his arms, the paper crumpled from his grip.

That night, the words he repeated most were:

"My child... My child is gone..."

As if adding the pain of losing his and Shen Nian's first child, he cried with restraint, choked with sobs.

It was then that Lu Lingchen learned that Shen Nian had been pregnant again, but she had terminated the pregnancy.

All those nutritional supplements had been bought by Lu Lingchuan. He had specifically consulted obstetrics and gynecology experts about post-miscarriage care, then had Lu Lingchen deliver the supplements to Shen Nian and arrange time off for her to rest and recover at home.

Lu Lingchuan loved her but didn't dare express it openly.

When he first heard about their hundred-day agreement, Lu Lingchen was utterly confused.

"What's the point of this hundred-day agreement? After 100 days, then what? How will you handle your relationship?"

After a long silence on the other end of the phone, Lu Lingchuan said, "This hundred-day agreement is a test for her... and for me. I no longer have the courage to believe she still loves me."

"During these 100 days, we'll set aside the past and get along well... If after 100 days, she's still willing to love me, I'll ask for nothing else, just her. ... If she doesn't want to love me anymore, I'll set her free, let her live a new life. What she's learned from me over these years is enough for her to stand on her own feet anywhere. And these 100 days will be the final memories she leaves me."

Although Lu Lingchen still didn't fully understand, once the agreement was made, it was visibly clear that both of them became more relaxed. Free from the constraints of external pressures, they dated and loved each other like an ordinary couple.

He had thought they could finally put the past behind them and start anew, but Lu Lingchuan told him, "Shen Nian is hiding something from me."

Lu Lingchen was surprised: "Have you discovered something?"

"No," Lu Lingchuan shook his head.

It was precisely because he hadn't discovered anything that he felt uneasy.

Lu Lingchen tried to reassure him: "Maybe you're overthinking it. I think Shen Nian seems quite normal."

Lu Lingchen couldn't be blamed for thinking this way, because Shen Nian appeared perfectly normal in front of everyone. There were no visible signs of any issues.

When someone is desperately trying to conceal something, they will do everything to prevent the truth from coming to light.

Lu Lingchuan said no more, only silently taking out a diamond ring from his pocket and fingering it gently.

Seeing the ring, Lu Lingchen understood everything.

"You've decided to propose?"

"Yes." He replied in a low voice, his fingertip tracing the pinyin of her name engraved inside the ring.

niàn

He said, "I've contacted a mall owner and collaborated with him to apply for a fireworks display."

On the last day of their hundred-day agreement, he would propose to her.

He had planned everything.

By the end of the year, those two beasts would undoubtedly face the death penalty. Once Lu Lingrui's matter was resolved, they could be together properly.

He had thought their days would continue peacefully like this, but on the 50th day of their hundred-day agreement, Lu Lingchuan received a phone call.

It was from Lu Lingchen.

Li Mingshi's condition had suddenly deteriorated.

When Lu Lingchuan rushed to the hospital, Li Mingshi had just been pulled back from the brink of death by the doctors.

She lay in bed, with a ventilator attached. Her previously clouded eyes cleared slightly when she saw Lu Lingchuan.

She reached out her hand to Lu Lingchuan. Lu Lingchuan immediately understood, walked over, took her hand, and lowered his head to bring his ear close.

Li Mingshi's face was pale as she breathed with difficulty, tears sliding down from the corners of her eyes.

She leaned close to Lu Lingchuan's ear and spoke.

"Nian Nian and Rui Rui were both good children. Our family just wasn't fortunate enough to keep them..."

"Let's not hurt her anymore... Let her go live her own life."

Li Mingshi spoke with great difficulty, tears falling uncontrollably.

"All these years... Mom has been blaming her for the pain of losing Rui Rui. Mom has wronged her, and Rui Rui has wronged her too..."

"It's not that she owes us, but that we, the Lu family, owe her... If she stays with our family, she'll never be able to move past Rui Rui's death."

"Let her go. Our Lu family isn't worthy of her. Without us... she'll have a better life."

"..."

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