Why Did I Become the Villainess?

    "Ysavel, do you plan to eat noodles every day? Look how thin you are already." Lena grumbled at me while cleaning the living room.

     Lena is my roommate and my only friend in this world. For someone like me who rarely goes out, I don't have many friends.

     I look at her and sigh. "As if I have any other choice. You know how tight my budget is." I said while typing on my old laptop. I'm currently working on my twenty-third novel and hopefully my first novel for publishing.

     Lena stops wiping the furniture and looks at me. "I could lend you some if you want."

     I shake my head at her. "I already owe you a lot. I don't want to add that. And it wouldn't kill me if I eat noodles for a week. After I submit this novel to my editor, I could probably buy a proper meal then. Hopefully, they will accept this for publishing." I wish this novel will be accepted, or else I don't know what to do. My blog site barely helps me.

    Lena sits beside me and takes one of my hands. "Ysavel, I know this might sound out of line but haven't you considered shifting careers?"

    I stop for a minute and look back at Lena. Lena has been my friend since I started living independently. She saw how desperate I am to be a writer. That even if my novels always got rejected, I always try to write a new one. She knew that even I am struggling to make a living out of it, I still couldn't just give it up.

   "You know how much I love writing. It's already like my identity now. I couldn't live without it. I may be struggling right now, but that's where everyone started. Someday, I know I will become a very famous writer that everyone in this town will recognize me."

Lena shakes her head with my response. "Okay, I wouldn't force it then. I just hope you wouldn't be too harsh on yourself. Eat something properly, and you should also get out too. It would be best if you get some sun. Look how pale you are." She stands up and walks towards the kitchen area. "I'll cook you something. Stop eating that noodles. It's not healthy for you."

    I look at her and smile. I'm really thankful to Lena. If not for her, I'll probably be begging on the streets now.

     Changing careers? Can I actually do it? I look at my old laptop. But I really love writing, though. Even if I always felt discouraged and heartbroken every time my novels got rejected for publishing. I still believe that I will be a writer.

     Lena comes back with a bowl of vegetable salad and a plate of pasta. Spaghetti. My mouth instantly watered with the sight of it. One thing about Lena, her cooking is the best. "Thank you for the food." I put down the chopsticks I'm using to eat the noodles and eat the pasta first. Finally, a delicious meal.

     I stopped eating when I remember something. "Lena, If I told you to stop being a policewoman, will you do it?"

     "Why do you ask?"

     I put down my chopsticks and look at her. "I just remember what you said about writing."

"Ysavel, that is a different thing, okay?" Lena taps the table violently out of frustration. "Ysavel, I know you love writing very much, but you should also take into consideration your current situation. If it isn't because of your blog site, do you think you will able to sustain a living if you solely based on your novels?"

I do understand where all these frustrations are coming from. Even I felt frustrated at times. I really wanted to write a story that everyone will love but every novel I wrote is not enough.

"I know that's why I'm working so hard on my current novel. I promise you. This one will be my breakthrough."

Lena just rolled her eyes at me and eats with me. She probably knows that no matter how many times she convinced me, I'll never turn my back on writing.

She sighs and holds my hand. "I'm just concerned for you. I know you just don't say it to me, but I know you feel sad every time your stories get rejected. I want to support you, really. It's just that I want you to be happy too."

"But I'm happy!"

She smiles and squeezes my hand she's holding. "Of course you're happy. Writing is one of the things that make you happy. But it's also the source of your sadness Ysa."

I sighed and closed my laptop. "But that's part of growing Lena. We need to get hurt to learn, and as a writer, I need to learn many things to create an amazing story. But thank you, I know you're concerned about me, and I appreciate it."

My phone rings suddenly. It's an alarm appointment with my editor.

I gathered my things immediately. "I'm sorry, Lena, I need to go know. I have an appointment with my editor today. I'll just see you later, okay?" I bid my goodbyes at her and left.

I know that what I'm doing seems futile to someone, but I know it will be worth it in the future. I will become a writer for sure. With that thought, I happily walk towards our office.

    An hour after, I was walking home with a dejected soul for the 22nd time. The last novel I submitted got rejected again. They said the plot is actually promising, but the story got messed up. It got potential but not enough to be published.

   Out of frustration, I kicked the stone that I see on the street. It then hits a small child that is sitting at the corner. She looks lost. She is wearing very fancy and expensive-looking clothes. It seems like she came from a wealthy family. She looks like a doll because of her blonde hair and blue eyes. The only problem is she gives off an aura of a typical spoiled brat child. She keeps shrieking, and then she looks at me and glares at me.

    "Are you the one who threw the rock at me?" She asked and crossed her arms. She seized me up and down and then frowns.

     I instantly walk towards her and checks if she got hurt. I couldn't offend someone like her. The money I have right now is only enough to last me for next week. If I ever hurt her, I'm pretty sure I'll be a beggar tomorrow.

   "Are you okay little child? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to throw the rock at you." I wanted to check on her, but when I tried to touch her, she just shoves my hands.

   "Don't touch me, you filthy thing! Do you know what you just did? You almost killed me." The little girl hysterically shouts at me.

    What did she say? I didn't even get a chance to hold her, and if she's talking about the stone, it didn't even touch her. Why is this kid overreacting?

    "I'm sorry, okay. Do you want candy? I have one here." I look for the free candy the cafe store waitress gave me and offered it to her.

    The little girl immediately slaps my hand with the candy and directly walks towards a person passing by while shouting. "She's poisoning me. Ahhhh! Help!!!"

    What the heck? Poisoning who? Her? I don't even know her. Why would I do that? I smiled awkwardly at the passerby.

   "I'm sorry my little sister's illness works up again. I'm not trying to poison her. She just thinks I am because she hasn't taken her medicine yet." I gently explain while trying to tug the little girl's hand away from the passerby. "Come on, little sister. Mother is already waiting for us."

    "Mother, your face! I don't have an ugly sister like you!" She hysterically said, then bites my hand. "You're ugly!" She runs towards an alley.

     What the heck is wrong with that child? Ugly? Me? She's the one ugly. All her family is ugly!

"Aren't you going to get your sister? The alley she runs to is quite dangerous for a kid like her."

   I look at the passerby and smile awkwardly. Why did I even say she's my sister? If I don't follow her, then this person might think that I'm really planning to poison her. I guess I have no choice then.

    "He he he. Of course, I was just supposed to call our mother. Excuse me then." I immediately run towards the alley the girl runs. I saw her at the top of the garbage bins while two stray dogs are barking at her.

I immediately shoved the two stay dogs away and put the little girl down. "Are you okay? Did they bite you?"

She just looks at me bewildered.

"Come on, let's get out of here first. It's not safe in here. There's a lot of stray dogs that could bite us." I immediately walk her towards the direction where we came from.

"Why are you helping me?" The little girl asked after we got through the alley. I look at her and kneel. "I was mean to you and even called you ugly. So, why?" She asked again.

"Because you need help. Everyone will help you if they are in my shoe too. Anyways, what are you doing here? Where are your parents? Give me their contacts so I could call them for you."

She shakes her head and gets something out of her bag. She handed me a vintage looking notebook.

"Since you help me, I'm giving this to you. You want to be a writer, right? Write your next novel on this notebook, and you'll be famous for sure, but you should be-"

"YSAVELL!!" A loud shout comes from a distance. I didn't get what the little girl was saying at the end because of the shout. I look around and saw Lena running towards me.

"Are you going home?" She then looks at the notebook I was holding. "Did you buy this? This looks antic. Why did you buy this?"

I shook my head and turned towards the girl. "I didn't buy it, this little-" I didn't finish my words when I didn't saw the girl.

"What girl?"

I immediately turn my head everywhere, but I couldn't find her. "Do you see the little girl I am with?"

Lena looks at me, confused. "What girl are you talking about? I didn't saw anyone with you. And if you're with someone, I could immediately see that person for sure because I saw you get out from that alley." Lena then points towards the alley I come from.

"But I was really with a little girl when I walk out from that alley. You didn't saw her?"

Lena then shook her head. "I really didn't see anyone. Maybe you're just tired or something. I told you. It would be best if you stopped writing at midnight. Come on, let's go home. Maybe it's just your imagination."

I wanted to complain because I was definitely with a little girl. When I saw the little girl waving her hand at me on the opposite street, she seems to say something to me by gesturing her hands, but I couldn't understand what she wants to say. She then waves her hand again and walks towards a building.

Maybe that's where her parents are. I'm glad she's safe. But I don't understand what the girl is saying. I hope it's not that important.

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