Tunnel Rat

Chapter 95: Cheesey Deals

Milo Chapter 95

Gert made a gesture for her guards to be wary but not attack. It had been alarming to have someone leap from a roof to start negotiations, but she understood the need for some people to make flamboyant gestures. This was after all Shadowport, home to thieves and smugglers, pirates and princes.

And he'd said his name was Milo. She couldn't get a good look at him with the cowl over his face, but the description fit. There were some strange stories circulating about him. Not the least of which were showing up with a bunch of engineers and a troll to beat a world boss. His follow up was stealing an airship for Squint and rescuing two hundred people from slavery.

On second thought, a leaping dismount from a couple of stories up wasn't really flamboyant for this guy at all. Just business.

Gert tried to act nonchalant, as if she was used to people showing up this way. "What do you have to sell?"

Milo pointed to the warehouse. "Nothing to sell for gold. I don't need money. I need food. You have cheese? Maybe some apples? A hundred bags of flour? I'd like to go shopping."

Gert made a dismissive gesture. "What part of 'Come back in two days.' don't you understand?"

Milo seemed to ponder that question, taking it seriously. "None of it, to be honest. You seem to want to increase profits by waiting for demand to raise prices. Why wait two days? I've got the money now. Just charge me what you would charge in two days. That's better for you. After all, who knows when a ship full of food comes sailing in and ruins your market?"

Gert waved him forward. "Fine. Come take a look and point to what you need. But if you're wasting my time, I'm waiting three days and people can thank you for empty bellies."

Inside was a full warehouse. Barrels of salted fish and pork were stacked high against the walls. Double baked biscuit for the ships was in sealed crates. Hard sausage, cooked and smoked hard to last for months. There was wine, beer, and alcohol of all sorts. Smoked meats hung from the ceiling as whole carcasses wrapped in burlap along with stacks of ham and slabs of pork bacon. And in one corner, a pile of large wheels of cheese sealed in red wax. A few other kinds were there as well, but it seemed cheddar was back on the menu for a long time. Milo tallied the number of boxes, barrels, tubs, and hanging carcasses. It would feed a lot of people.

"Ok, I’ve seen what I need to see. Let's go back out. If I'm doing a deal, I want witnesses." Milo was acutely aware of the number of guards in the warehouse versus the number of Milos.

Gert scowled. "You think I'd cheat you?"

Milo replied blandly. "I don't know you at all, and you don't know me, so let’s not get into judgement here. Having a few witnesses for the transaction protects you as well as me. After all, I can hardly complain later about a deal I made in front of two-hundred people. People are on edge, and hungry people tell wild stories. I want a simple transaction with no hassles, and so do you." Gert grunted, and they went back outside to the front of the warehouse. The guards inside immediately checked the doors and windows, even the roof, taking no chances this was a distraction for heist.

Milo approached Brother Ignatius. "So how much would all this be normally?" He ran down the list of what he had seen. Ignatius waved in some of the women from the choir. They knew the market far better than he did, having bought the food for their families for decades. They argued for a bit, and tallied up the list, and finally looked at Milo "There's over thirty thousand gold in food inside, she must have been buying and hording long-lasting supplies for a long time. The price has been going up lately."

Milo thanked them and walked back to Gert. "How much do you want for it?"

Gert's eyes narrowed "Be specific. The cheese?"

Milo looked up at her, standing on the warehouse steps. She was already two foot taller than he was, even before you added a six-foot advantage from being on the warehouse loading dock. "No. The warehouse. All of it. How much?"

Gert understood now. This guy was a kulag, and as crazy as Squint. Was whatever Squint had contagious? At least he didn't have a pair of murder-kitties following him around. "Let's assume I take you serious. How would you pay for it?"

"Well, I do have this."

Milo pulled a long rod out of his sleeve. It looked like a golden ceremonial mace. It was studded with diamonds, pearls, and rubies over most of the head. An especially large diamond was set into the handle. Philistron had made a little trophy holder for it. Milo had simply tossed it into his chest. He didn't know it's real value, but he knew it was worth a lot. The slaver-mage wouldn't have kept junk in his private sanctum.

The golden scepter glowed in the half light of Shadowport. Gert sucked in her breath and leaned forward. The crowd murmured. Ignacious took three steps to Milo and scrutinized it before saying something in a language Milo didn't know and saying a short prayer. Gert had walked forward, motioning her guards to stay back. "May I?"

Milo handed it to her. Ignatius, eyes still wide, looked at him and asked a burning question. "That is the Sun Scepter of the Order of Mithras, a blessed item that is sacred to an order of Paladins. It disappeared from their main temple complex over fifty years ago and hasn't been seen since. It's priceless! Every treasure hunter in the world has been looking for it and trying to claim the reward. I believe they raised it again last year to 200,000 gold pieces and a very nice house on the beach!"

Gert was trying not to shake. She had a very high skill in both Appraisal, and Identification. Just holding the thing was convincing her. Every gem was real, the gold was pure, and it identified just as Ignatius had said. And the priest was convinced. She'd known him for years and could read him like a book.

Milo looked at her. "So, we have a deal? My scepter for your warehouse. I know you wanted 3-4 times value for your goods. That leaves a bit left over for the building. I'll take the warehouse; you get the shiny bauble and can retire. It's heavy to pack around, and no one could make change for it when I tried to use it to buy some cheese."

Ignatius held his breath. Gert looked at Milo. "So many things are wrong with this deal. A legendary item? And you just casually produce it and trade it off for salted fish!!?"

Milo shrugged. "My friends are hungry, and I need some cheese. You didn't break any rules and should be allowed to make a profit. I don't need the thing, and I'm not attached to it. Win/Win/Win deal. The best kind."

Gert handed it back to him. "I can't trust a deal like this. I just can't." The crowd murmured, somewhere nearby a dog barked.

Brother Ignatius looked at her. "Gert, on my oath as a Priest, I tell you that this is a good man who would not cheat you."

Gert looked from the priest to Milo. "And what about him, what does he swear by?"

Good question. Milo wasn't sure about that. His oath as an engineer? He looked over where the children were sitting, playing with a dog.

Milo placed the scepter back in Gert's hand but held onto the haft. "I’ll swear upon the Goddess of Travelers and ask her to throw me to the eels if I’m trying to cheat you."

Gert started to speak, but stopped. A woman was walking towards her, passing through the crowd. No one was reacting to her, not Milo, Ignatius, or her guards. It was like only Gert and the woman existed, everything else seemed unreal. "Take it. I guarantee what it is, and will give you a blessing on your journey to return it. There will be a boat at the docks willing to make the trip. Pay the fisherman’s fee and you will arrive at the temple of Mithras safely."

Gert's eyes widened slightly, then she said to Milo. "You have a deal." They shook hands.

Milo reached into his sleeve where he had 'burrowed' a couple of apples, tossing them to the boy and his sister.

From the direction of the docks, a commotion was heard. Several people were pointing out to sea where two ships had just turned into the bay and were running under full sail, the smaller in front, but by so little that it almost seemed to be towing the huge ship behind it.

Gert looked at the smaller ship...and knew. "Thomas, Val? You've been with me the longest. Want to take a little trip? Grab a couple of packs with our clothes and some sausage. We need to meet that little sloop with the grey sail that's coming in to port."

She turned to Milo. "The rest of them are good guys. They've been paid ahead for a fortnight. Ignatius knows some of them. You'd do good to treat them well. Best of luck to you. I'm going to go lay on a beach with two good looking guys and drink wine for a year."

Milo wasn't sure why anyone would want to be so out in the open. Sand, water, and sky? Nope, he preferred his tunnels and caverns. Which he was going to get back to before anything eles happened.

He had just filled his pack with cheese and bread, when he heard a commotion from the docks. The small sloop with the grey sail had just made it to port. He saw Gert boarding with her two companions. Further out in the bay, a much larger ship struggled as the wind that had filled its sail died away. It was a strange thing, made of rusty metal, belching out steam and smoke as a paddle wheel pushed it to port.

Behind the ship, a huge drakonic head broke the surface and screamed in outrage as its prey fled for land. It looked like even odds whether the ship would make port before the huge dragonsnake caught it. A smell came to Milo: Eel. He really hated eels, this one probably needed to be taught a lesson. He tossed his pack into a shadowy spot on a nearby roof, and started running across the buildings towards the docks. From a nearby bar, Captain Pike exploded out the door, harpoon in hand and headed in the same direction.

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