Chapter 79: It was confusing.
It was confusing.
Until late at night, Sezh did nothing but sit staring blankly. Raytan didn’t answer her question, but Sezh already knew. He was clearly avoiding her.
She didn’t understand. Why all of a sudden?
No, actually, it should have been Sezh who avoided him. The time of the coup before her return was right around the corner. Sezh didn’t want to think that the current Raytan she knew would cut off her head again, but she had no choice but to keep anticipating it.
‘Yes, it’s rather good that he’s ignoring me.’
Sezh tried hard to accept things like that, but her heart didn’t follow her head. Even after he avoided her and called her annoying, her worries didn’t fade away.
As the dusk deepened and the full moon emerged from the dark sky, Sezh began to think again. What if something she didn’t know about happened? Sezh felt the urge to find out what was going on. Maybe it will also help her to prevent the coup.
In the end, without even notifying Luna, Sezh headed to Raytan’s palace after midnight.
***
“Brother Raytan,” Sezh gathered up all the courage to call him, but no voice answered back.
When Sezh opened the library door, all she could see was the dusty desk greeting her. Same with the bedrooms and bathrooms. Raytan was nowhere to be seen. She also went to the training ground, but only the empty water bottle she saw before was there.
‘Let’s wait.’
After not visiting Raytan’s palace for a few days, Sezh didn’t want to unsuccessfully go back without seeing him. So Sezh squatted in the corner of the training ground. She didn’t know where Raytan was or what he’s doing, but anyway, he had to pass through this training ground to get back to his palace.
Even though she was wearing a cloak, her body still started to tremble. Sezh tightened her old cloak and played with the water bottle in her hand. While doing that, she organized some words in her mind to question Raytan.
‘Brother, what’s going on?’
‘What was the blood I saw the other day? Does it have anything to do with your situation?
‘And why… Are you avoiding me?’
But in an instant, she heard a voice coming from behind her. Sezh jumped up reflexively and looked back. Behind the training ground, there was a byway that led outside of Raytan’s palace.
But he said no one uses it since it’s connected to the forest? What if it’s someone suspicious?
As she tried to move, she saw a shadow of a man jump over the wall. The bright moonlight shone over the tall person’s face.
Today too, his hair still looked a bit messy, his mouth was closed tight, his face showing signs of exhaustion. And…
She could also see blood dripping all over the person’s body. Sezh froze in place.
“…!”
The old water bottle fell from her limp hand.
Thud
As the loud sound of the falling water bottle sounded out, Raytan quickly turned back to Sezh’s location. On alert, he quickly drew his sword.
Soon blue eyes and blood-red eyes met.
“Bro-Brother…” Sezh gaped with a bewildered face. “Rayta-…”
She couldn’t continue her words.
It was because of the sword in his large hand. A sharp sword that could strike her at any moment. Even the blood that soaked it was still not dry.
Drip, drip, drip.
Drops of blood reflected in her eyes. Sezh could feel her blood uncontrollably rush through her body.
“…”
Seeing Sezh, Raytan’s red eyes shook wildly.
Raytan stared at Sezh without saying anything… Sezh took a step backward without realizing it and stumbled down.
“B-Brother… I…”
‘…Damn fucking blue eyes and blonde hair.’
‘It’s not just you, Sezh. I’ll kill all the blondes with blue eyes.’
His cold voice, the feeling of the blade piercing into her skin, and even the unpleasant sound of her breaking neck were vividly revived.
“…Sezh.”
Raytan slowly began to approach her.
‘No, it’s fine. Nothing will happen,’ Sezh tried to reassure herself, but she failed. All she could see was that blood-stained sword.
“Se-…”
“I, as well….” Sezh bit her lip with a pale face. “Are you going to kill me?”
‘Like in the past…?’
The rest of the words she couldn’t utter stuck in her throat and echoed in her head. Sezh’s frail body shuddered intensely.
“…”
There was no word in return. Raytan just stared at Sezh with a sorrowful face. Having just stood still before, he came closer to Sezh.
Sezh, who sat down, could only close her eyes tightly. But, she felt no pain. The sharp blade didn’t slice her neck, and she didn’t hear words of ridicule.
Something heavy had just dropped onto her shoulders. Sezh then opened her eyes. What Raytan had wrapped around her shoulders was the robe he had been wearing. Raytan, with legs bent and looking at her eye to eye, gently caressed Sezh’s cheek.
“… The night air is cold.”
“…”
“You’re weak, so if you catch a cold, you’ll get sick for a few more days than others…”
Brother.
Sezh can feel that word fill up her throat to the brim, but she still couldn’t say it out loud.
Sezh looked at Raytan silently. She could clearly see the splattered blood on Raytan’s face and his hands. It’s probably on her cheeks now too. As she thought this, Raytan’s hands were slightly trembling.
“Go back, Sezh…” Raytan’s voice was low and cracked. “And never come here again. Anyway, now you too…” He paused for a moment, then bit his lips helplessly. “…are afraid of me.”
His head drooped. Following that, he moved his hands away and rose. He then stared down at her. Raytan didn’t look full of anger like when he had cut off her head. Instead, Raytan had an indescribable expression on his face.
Sezh wouldn’t even dare to guess whose blood is soaking him or anything Raytan did to that unlucky person. However, one thing was for sure. Raytan was unhappy right now.
Did she say something that-
“Goodbye, Sezh,” Raytan then turned back slowly.
Those simple words he uttered sounded like a sign for an eternal farewell.
“Brother Raytan!” Sezh called his name out loud, but Raytan didn’t look back.
Sezh staggered up and ran towards Raytan, who was getting farther away.
As they got closer, there was a fishy smell. Sezh could see the blood all over his body. However, without hesitation, Sezh hugged Raytan from behind.
“Brother, I…” Sezh cried. “I think I look like a stupid person right now.”
Raytan had walked toward her, but his intention wasn’t to kill her as he did back then. He approached Sezh because he was worried about her sitting on the floor. He had looked like a completely different person from the one who slashed off her head in the past. And perhaps that’s why he felt hurt that Sezh was scared he would kill her.
“I came here because I was worried. I went to the hill, and I came to your palace today… because I think that something might have happened to you…”
“…”
“Like that day again, you looked lonesome… I’m so worried…”
She didn’t even know anything herself. It was a lie to say she wasn’t scared in the least. Even after they got to know each other, sometimes the fright still crept into her heart. However, Sezh cared for Raytan a lot. If possible, she hoped that Raytan would never show such a sorrowful expression anymore. She hoped he wouldn’t feel lonely by himself. She hoped he didn’t get hurt. Or at least, it won’t be because of her.
“…”
Raytan stubbornly didn’t say anything.
He lowered his sight to see Sezh’s shaking hands that held him. Raytan moved his bloody hands to wrap around her delicate hands. After that, he turned around slowly and looked down at her.
He observed that tearful face of hers and then softly caressed it with his fingers.
“Forget everything you saw today.”
“Brother…?”
“If someone asks you about me, say you don’t know. You don’t know anything. You have nothing to do with me, whatever it is.”
Sezh didn’t say anything. She only looked at him with tears in her eyes.
Raytan continued to stroke Sezh’s pale and tired face. He wiped her tears away, but the blood on his hands was now stamped there too. Looking at Sezh’s red-stained cheeks, Raytan frowned slightly. He didn’t mean to do that, he just wanted to get rid of her tears. He didn’t like to see her crying like that…
It’s going to be the same. Raytan knew it better than anyone. Whatever the reason, it would be the same if Sezh got involved with him. She could get hurt or even die because of him.
“…Now really go back to your palace, Sezh.” Raytan heavily withdrew his hands. “And don’t ever wander around at night alone again. Because something dangerous could happen.”
A sad smile was carved on Raytan’s lips. He gently stroked Sezh’s hair and then left her there alone.
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