The Guide to Conquering Earthlings

Chapter 41: 041



Chapter 41

Xie Cheng was astonished, but the whispers from the surrounding audience were even more shocking. It was at this moment that the host finally got an answer from the staff in a fluster -

"The microphone was left on by the head of security when he was directing the work backstage!"

Such a blunder occurring during a perfectly normal premiere left the staff very anxious. A group was just about to rush backstage when, without even waiting for them to enter, Lan Xi strode confidently out from behind the backstage curtains and onto the stage.

...

Lan Xi was somewhat surprised to find herself suddenly appearing on the stage. Just now she had heard some noise coming from this direction and thought it was a shortcut back into the venue hall, so she came over to try it out, not expecting that she would walk directly onto the stage.

The host was looking at her with an awkward and bewildered expression on his face and the audience below was also staring at her.

"So this really is a shortcut!" Lan Xi gave the host a friendly smile, "It's very close indeed!" She waved genially at the host, "Well, I'll get going now, please carry on!"

Having said that, she casually walked off the stage and returned to her seat.

Yet, she didn't know why, but the entire audience was quietly watching her. Even Xie Yunfei was looking at her uncomfortably, in short, the atmosphere was strange.

Lan Xi couldn't help but ask: "Did something happen just now?"

Xie Yunfei forced a laugh: "Well... someone just shared their rather eccentric views on choosing a spouse..."

"Oh?" Lan Xi was indifferent, "My views on choosing a spouse are quite ordinary."

The Guide had said that at critical moments, you must show that you are different from other women! Thereby highlighting your own strengths! As an intelligent princess, Lan Xi naturally seized the opportunity to put what she learned into practice.

She glanced gently at Xie Yunfei and coquettishly said: "In this world, there really are many women with eccentric, overbearing views on choosing a spouse, but I'm not one of them. I'm very ordinary and traditional in this regard, rule-abiding and conventional. You can rest assured..."

"...Xie Yunfei's expression was hard to describe. He seemed to try reminding her again, "Have you noticed that many people are looking at you? Do you know why?"

Lan Xi confidently smiled: "I know."

"You know? Then... you don't care at all?"

Lan Xi lowered her voice: "They're looking at me probably because I'm so good looking. I'm often looked at like this. Don't worry, I don't mind. I'm used to it. Being beautiful is a kind of scenery in itself. Letting others appreciate it isn't a big deal. People shouldn't be petty."

"..."

Lan Xi's radiance was clearly received by Xie Yunfei. He was stunned for a moment, seemingly unable to fully absorb it all at once. He awkwardly got up, "I'll go have a smoke in the garden."

Xie Yunfei's movements were swift this time. By the time Lan Xi reacted, the seat next to her was already empty.

Yet Lan Xi waited for a while and Xie Yunfei was gone for quite some time just for a smoke. He still hadn't returned.

The Guide mentioned that when necessary, showing concern for the other person's health demonstrates thoughtfulness and tenderness, which can make men from Earth fall rapidly!

Lan Xi thought about it and headed for the garden as well.

**

On the other side, in the garden, Xie Yunfei was holding a cigarette but didn't have a chance to smoke it at all.

"Xie Yunfei, explain clearly to me! We haven't broken up and yet you brazenly brought another woman to the premiere of my friend's film?! If she hadn't told me, I would still be kept in the dark!"

"I rushed over today to catch you red-handed! Where is that cheap, little vixen mistress?! Is it that model Mia who was making eyes at you during the last gathering?! Today, I'm going to fix her good!"

...

Xie Yunfei felt recently that his luck had been rather bad. Not to mention Lan Xi's eccentric personality and accident-prone constitution, even when he came out here for some fresh air and to sneak a smoke to avoid the various looks in the hall, he still managed to run into his ex-girlfriend Lisa.

There were already many reporters present for today's premiere event, and outside there were all kinds of fans equipped with telephoto lens and phones lying in wait. Xie Yunfei didn't want there to be a scandal here.

So he spoke gently, hoping to gloss things over for the time being: "Lisa, you've misunderstood..."

But before he could finish, a loud voice suddenly interrupted him from behind —

"Xie Yunfei! Stop smoking! Smoking kills sperm and affects sperm quality. It's not good for breeding future generations with me in the future!"

"..."

Lisa's previously softened gaze instantly sharpened once more: "Still trying to lie to me?! The mistress is right at your door! And already thinking about breeding future generations with you!"

Xie Yunfei felt utterly helpless. Lisa was great in many ways, but her temper was particularly spoiled and hysterical.

As for Lan Xi, he didn't know what was going on with her! Wasn't this asking for trouble?!

Lisa's emotional state was already beginning to spiral out of control. She undid the diamond necklace around her neck, "You originally gave me this diamond and said your feelings for me were as hard as this diamond. But now..."

She started crying, "How far have you developed with her?! Did you sleep with her?!"

Xie Yunfei tried to calm the raging storm and explain that nothing had happened between him and Lan Xi. But before he could say anything, Lan Xi exclaimed loudly in pleasant surprise —

"How did you know we slept together?!"

...

Lan Xi was indeed very pleasantly surprised. So it could be seen!

It turns out that the atmosphere between her and Xie Yunfei had already reached such a degree! Although Xie Cheng said some men remain unchanged even after sleeping together, that it was pointless, but her time sleeping with Xie Yunfei was clearly not pointless! It was very effective! Even Lisa could see that things were different between them!

"We just slept together recently." Lan Xi smiled at Lisa, "As for what you said about his feelings for you being as hard as a diamond, doesn't that just mean such feelings are extremely fragile?"

Lan Xi took the diamond necklace from Lisa's hand and gently squeezed it in her palm. The diamonds instantly turned to powder.

Lisa stared with mouth agape: "You...my diamonds..."

Lan Xi patted Lisa's shoulder sympathetically and kindly showed Lisa, "You see, he used such a fragile thing to represent his feelings for you. You'd better just let go..."

"..."

With eyes red around the rims, Lisa looked at the remaining wreckage of the diamond necklace. Finally, she lost control of her emotions: "Xie Yunfei, just you wait!"

Having said that, she hurriedly slipped away outside, almost tripping in her heels.

Xie Yunfei was conflicted about whether to follow, but eventually still chased after her.

...

As Xie Yunfei left her behind, Lan Xi didn't feel imbalanced at all. She watched his gradually disappearing figure and was even in quite a good mood. But after a moment, she suddenly realized something and regretted belatedly.

She had hitched a ride here with Xie Yunfei. But now Xie Yunfei had run off. Wouldn't Lan Xi have to pay out of her own pocket for a taxi back?!

More money to spend! She should have followed him out! At least gotten a free ride!

Lan Xi angrily kicked a pebble which, propelled by excessive force, flew into an adjacent wall and went right through it. The previously intact wall now had a small hole...

"Why didn't you unleash that power earlier?"

As Lan Xi gloomily prepared to take a taxi, a familiar voice sounded from behind.

Was it Xie Cheng?

Lan Xi turned and indeed saw Xie Cheng's face. He was dressed very formally in a dark lead-colored suit. For some reason, his expression was especially cold. His tall, crisp figure exuded an air of oppressiveness and loftiness. He was currently looking coldly at Lan Xi.

"Xie Cheng! You're here too!"

Lan Xi displayed an almost overjoyed expression as if greeting an old friend from hometown. "Xie Cheng, great! Are you leaving? Can I hitch a ride with you?"

Unfortunately, Xie Cheng did not directly answer Lan Xi's question. Instead, he stared at her strangely.

"No need to pretend you didn't see me."

"Huh?" Lan Xi was a little confused, but there was no need to care about these details. She only cared about one question: "Can I go with you?"

Unfortunately, Xie Cheng just pursed his lips and said nothing, his face displeased.

After a while, he spoke again, asking a completely unrelated question.

"Did you sleep with Xie Yunfei?"

"I did!"

Lan Xi thought for a moment. After all, Xie Cheng had once patiently taught her about the issue of sleep. Now she should also share some of her advanced experience to give back to him. So she enthusiastically and friendly said, "Actually Xie Yunfei's body is still healthy. After sleeping with him, I didn't feel uncomfortable or get infected with any diseases. Sleeping makes me feel pretty good and very comfortable! I feel full of energy after sleeping, as if I was fully charged!"

How could it not be! If she hadn't caught up on that nap with Xie Yunfei in the car, she would probably still be sleepy and lacking in energy now!

As a result, despite her heartfelt sharing, not only was Xie Cheng unappreciative, but he also looked on the verge of anger.

He glared at Lan Xi, almost gritting his teeth: "You still feel charged? Haven't you gotten over that addiction yet? Didn't I tell you long ago to enrich your life by doing more other things and finding some healthy hobbies?"

Sleep is very healthy and nourishing... How could it not be? Is it something worth being so shocked about? Is it something worth Xie Cheng showing a murderous look on his face?

Lan Xi really wanted to explain, but she could feel that Xie Cheng was probably in a bad mood today. He looked like he was about to explode with anger. The Guide said, less is more when someone is angry. When an Earthling is angry, it's best to stay quiet and only answer whatever they ask, to avoid conflict!

Lan Xi bit her lip and remained quiet and well-behaved. However, Xie Cheng seemed to be in an extremely bad mood, because his face looked even uglier.

She saw him fiddle with his tie in slight irritation: "When did you sleep with him?"

"Hmm?"

"When did you sleep with him?"

Lan Xi suddenly understood and answered his questions accordingly: "Just now!"

"Just now?"

"Yeah, yeah, just now in the car."

"In the car?" Xie Cheng's calm appearance from before completely shattered. Contrary to his usual unperturbed manner, his voice rose several notes, full of disbelief and incredulity. "You took the opportunity of the drive over just now and couldn't wait to sleep with him in the car?!"

What's wrong with that?

Lan Xi didn't understand: "When you want to sleep, you sleep. The atmosphere was right, the feeling hit, so we just slept. That's something completely natural that would happen."

With the bumpy sensation at that time and the drowsy feeling from the warm sunset shining in, didn't it make people feel sleepy? Was it something worth being so shocked about? Was it something worth Xie Cheng showing a murderous look?

"He just slept with you, but now he has ditched you to run out to find his ex-girlfriend. How can you tolerate this? Don't you feel pathetic and heartbroken?"

Lan Xi carefully sensed her emotions - she didn't feel pathetic or heartbroken at all. On the contrary, she even felt invigorated from her nap and happy about receiving the red envelope.

Xie Cheng looked coldly at Lan Xi, his face ugly. "For a man like Xie Yunfei, I think you'd better pray that you're free to follow him at any time, as that may be the only way to tie him down. But that still doesn't rule out the possibility that he is shameless. If you can tolerate what just happened, who knows if in the future he will engage in threesomes."

Threesomes?

Lan Xi's eyes lit up. "I can do threesomes!"

There was an Earth saying that went: "When three people work together, one will always be my teacher." Lan Xi actively applied what she learned. She was confident that her response demonstrated her authentic Earthling identity: "I can also take this opportunity to learn some real skills and find a teacher among them!"

Her answer was extremely positive, loving learning. But for some reason, Xie Cheng's face turned as black as an octopus ready to attack, like he was filled to the brim with ink.

"You'd even look for a teacher and ask for skills advice regarding something like this?! Lan Xi, do you have no shame?!"

What does this have to do with shame?

Lan Xi couldn't help muttering: "Back then I also wanted to sleep with you, but you didn't want to. Now you're jealous of us, but you can also find someone to sleep with, one person's not enough, get two!"

"I'm not as promiscuous as you guys." However, Xie Cheng didn't seem comforted by Lan Xi's words at all. On the contrary, his face became even darker. "Able to sleep in the car. Able to casually find someone and casually find a place to sleep. Also not opposed to threesomes."

"What's wrong with that? I can sleep in many places."

What Lan Xi said was true. Her Mu Yi people were not as delicate as Earthlings, fussing about having to sleep in bed. Occasionally when they were on military campaigns, sleeping rough was very common. As a result, Lan Xi had long cultivated the skill to adapt to her environment. Even just leaning against a wall, she could fall straight asleep.

She helpfully added: "But it's normal that you don't have this skill. After all, I practiced this for several years and have abundant experience. Don't look at how skilled I am now, that's just because practice makes perfect. I also started out as a complete beginner like you, with terrible skills..."

As it turns out, it would have been better not to say this. As soon as she finished speaking, Xie Cheng's face revealed that he could no longer endure this. His gaze also turned somewhat gritted teeth: "A beginner with terrible skills?"

Forget it, forget it, no need to talk about this anymore. It was obvious Xie Cheng's sleep skills were awful. Wasn't she just poking at his sore spot?

Better get back on topic. Lan Xi cleared her throat and revealed a friendly smile: "Nevermind, there's no time to lose. Are you in a hurry? Let's get going quickly then!"

"I'm in a hurry, so I'm leaving," Xie Cheng said coldly, giving Lan Xi a cold glance. His face looked darker than the night. "But you stay here. After all, I don't provide opportunities to sleep with you in the car, given that I'm such a beginner with terrible skills."

"?"

After saying that, Xie Cheng actually turned and left without even looking back.

As Lan Xi watched his receding figure, she was utterly confused.

This man must resent that her sleep skills are better than his!

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