Chapter 17: Another One Bends the Knee
Chapter 17: Another One Bends the Knee
Following a round of intimidation, the captured small imp happily agreed to bring us to his boss. After around ten minutes of walking, we met the group who tried to attack us two days ago. The group which had four large imps leading them.
Their boss was shocked by our sudden arrival and immediately bellowed to the others to prepare the defences.
Dont worry, we arent here to fight. I said as I stepped out of the shadow of Big 1 and onto the center stage. While they were recovering from the shock, I pointed at the cliffs and continued:
Im sure youve already seen the despicable scum blocking us from our common destination over there. They are definitely out to kill us and consume our flesh and souls. I had originally planned to charge into the blockade, but changed my mind in the end because of their immense numbers. If it was just us alone, attacking them would be suicidal. However, Im sure we arent the only ones having trouble entering that tunnel. I plan on gathering everyone, and with our combined might, break through that blockade! Are you guys willing to join me?
The boss scratched his head. He looked at us before turning towards the stairs and said in a deep, low voice: Why arent we the ones leading you?
Me:
Idiot, does it look like you have the brains for it!?
I wanted to burst out and say that however, I restrained myself for the greater good.
Why?
With a wave of my hand, I turned their attention to the devil army standing behind me. Because our fist is bigger than yours!
We wont know until we fight it out!
Oh, so youre saying you want to fight?
Silence. The large imp looked at me once more before turning back to the stairs; a conflicted look on his face.
To be honest, I didnt want to fight either. If we really came to blows it wouldve been a pyrrhic victory for us. Without our numbers, how are we going to break through to the upper floor entrance? Dont forget, there was only three days left before the blood sea engulfs this level.
However, in order to subjugate these devils without fighting, I had to show them my tough side. If I falter here and let them take the reins, what awaited us was..I really cant imagine a scenario where we wouldnt get into an argument with these muscle headed imps right as we combined forces.
This was why I must be the one to lead this combined army.
On the other side, the large imp was stuck in a dilemma. He wanted to defeat me, but he knew that even if he won, what awaited him was merely death at the stairway.
Just as we entered this awkward stalemate, a domineering voice echoed from above us, Since you guys have no way to decide, let me decide for you!
Everyone present immediately turned their heads towards the source of this voice. It was a one-eyed large imp standing atop a mound of rocks. As the winds blew around him, his scarred visage painted a truly imposing picture.
The one-eyed large imp was clearly enjoying the attention of our parties as he excitedly displayed a posture which screamed: Look at me, Im so powerful! In accordance with his previous grandstanding, he leaped off the mound and tripped as he landed
*bang*
After his magnificent fall, the large imp awkwardly stood up and coughed, Ahem, excuse me, my left eye is blind so I didnt see that rock. I thought it was flat ground.
Everyone:
Such a unique character.
Who are you?
Such an unusual entrancewhy is Purgatory so full of potatoes like him
Me? Haha, just call me One-eye. The one-eyed large imp pointed his thumb at himself as he said so. In a boisterous voice he said, Im looking for people to ally with. Lets join hands everyone and head towards a brighter future together! Under my leadership, well head towards victoryHahahaha
Whats with this chuuni like behaviourdid he grow up reading japanese shonen manga? No wait, Purgatory has no internet, god damnit! (TL:Middle School Year Two syndrome: That feeling you had in middle school where you suddenly feel your mangekyo sharingan awakening but those adult plebs dont understand how much of a genius you are for doing so.)
The other partys large imp reacted disdainfully as well to his proclamations. Huh? Alliance? Just you alone?
Of course not, there are people behind me!
Where are they?
Behind me The one-eyed large imp turned and looked. There was no one. He stood there stunned for a moment before bellowing, Get out here now! All of you. You dense bunch of idiots.
Boss, you are the one who told us not to come out without any orders given. The source of this voice was a slightly skinny large imp. He led a large group of devils out of the shadow of the rock mound. Hmm? Hes missing a finger on his left hand. Is he going to introduce himself as Nine-finger? Just like his boss.
His fingers aside, Nine-finger led a large army of devils which amounted to over a hundred. Their large imps alone, numbered eight. With One-eye and Nine-finger counted inside, it would be ten.
Boss, Ive always been an obedient guy.
Obedient? If this devil asks you to eat s***, will you do it?
Boss. You are too cruel The impudent imp balked at this suggestion. Again?But I just had s*** yesterday
Me:
Screw you guys, are you all performing a crosstalk or something!? (TL: A Chinese comedic act where two comedians engage in a rapid-fire dialogue.)
The appearance of these two stunned the crowd. I was so stunned that I forgot to get angry. Dont tell me these two idiots are here to perform a comedy skit? But that army behind them
Ahem, since my people are here, we can continue our previous conversation.
One-eye swept his gaze over both of our groups and began to speak. But he was interrupted by his sidekick with a nudge of his shoulder. He turned towards him and stared intently. Boss, thats some high class goods over there.
Im aware of that. With his grandstanding interrupted before he began, One-eye stared at his sidekick with his brows furrowed and pretended not to hear him.
Theres no point pretendingand what high class goodsdamn it!? What the heck happened to my body!? Why do all the devils stare at me with such a weird look on their faces?
Nine-fingers whisper was clearly heard by everyone present. This included Big 1 and the others. Big 1, 2, 3 and No.2, 3 immediately stepped in front of me and surrounded me in a tight protective ring. As for No.4 and No.5they were planning to step slightly forward but after comparing One-eyes body with theirs, they chose to defend my butt in the end.
One-eye flashed what he thought was a dashing, but was actually extremely hideous, smile at me: Dont worry, even though you are really pretty, whats more important is getting into that tunnel
What do you mean pretty!? Im handsome you hear me!? Look closely, I AM A GUY! G-U-Y, GUY!
How infuriating! Why the heck did all these Purgatory devils treat me as a beautiful female devil. Whats more, it was the kind of beauty who brought calamity to their city and country. This devil is a man! The kind whose fists can support a person standing on them and whose shoulders can support a race track. An iron-blooded man! Its just that my pee pee took a vacation. Theres no guarantee that he wont come back!
Mhm, Ive definitely given it a thorough look through. One-eyes sole eye gave me the x-ray treatment as he looked over my body. S***, I got goosebumps again.
Nine-finger whispered in his bosss ears: Boss, didnt you say that now wasnt the time for such things?
I know that, you dont have to remind me! He smacked Nine-finger on the head before turning to us with a satisfied look on his face: Lets continue our talk about an alliance.
I feel that this alliance should be led by our boss, hes the strongest here and is definitely able to lead us all to a glorious future! Just as One-eye finished his sentence, Nine-finger rushed forward with his bootlicking. After finishing, he asked in an ingratiating tone: Boss, did I say it correctly?
One-eye nodded, Mhm, not bad. A round of applause.
Applause! Nine-finger took the lead in clapping. The others slowly joined in dribs and drabs, despite not knowing what applause meant
Thank you, thank you. Thanks for all the support One-eye cupped his fists in a showy gesture of appreciation. He raised his head as he did so, a satisfied look on his face.
Wow, its really a crosstalk act.
After his round of bootlicking, he finally remembered that he had something important to say. In that case, Boss should be the one to lead our charge into the entrance. Any objections?
Cough. Too tired to tsukkomi. (TL: Japanese comedic act. Tsukkomi is the straight man and Boke is the comic.)
Why arent we the ones leading? The four imp group chimed in once more, reluctant to lose their leadership position.
One-eye threw them a disdainful look and continued ignoring them.
Nine-finger reverted back to his role as a court jester and coldly said: Because we are larger than you. If you dont listen to use, we will bash you to death.
After finishing, he even made a swiping gesture across his neck.
The four man group kept quiet at this. While they werent satisfied with the outcome, they didnt intend to resist to the bitter end.
If you guys are the ones in charge, Ill back out of this alliance. Its time to bring this comedy to an end. Its a matter of life and death right now. Rather than wasting time on this nonsense, I rather use the time to find new alliance members.
Back out? Pretty lady, may I ask why you wish to back out? What do you plan on doing after backing out?
Pretty my ass! I already said Im a guy not a girl!
Seeing me flare up, One-eye immediately changed his statement: Alright, alright. This prettyman, may I know what you plan on doing after backing out?
The veins on my forehead were about to burst at this moment, but I had no choice except to ignore that damned adjective of pretty. If it wasnt for his superior numbers, I wouldve murdered him already.
Ill just search around for groups I can recruit.
But we are the strongest power in this region, in terms of recruitment, we will definitely be faster than you.
Then Ill head further out to search. I replied in a resolute tone.
Prettyman, why arent you willing to ally with us? Im very strong and can protect you guys. Whats wrong with being commanded by me? Isnt obeying the strong the natural instinct of our race?
Its because you are brainless! BRAINLESS! Damn it. Damn it. Damn it. I pointed at my brain as I shouted: Pure strength isnt enough right now. You need to have brains!
Theres at least a hundred large imps guarding that entrance, not to mention the hordes of small imps. If I let you take command, you will definitely charge headlong into that blockade with us in tow.
Have you ever thought of leaving some reserves behind? Do you know how to grow stronger off battles? Have you ever considered that there might be a Head Imp leading that horde? Or even a Demon Child!?
This was the first time Ive ever vented my anger after reincarnating into Purgatory. It has hardly been two weeks since Ive arrived here, but Purgatory just rubs me up the wrong way. Everytime I look at the red viscous sea water, I have this strange itch in my throat. I wanted to spit at it but nothing came out.
I had to endure these potatoes beside me messing around. On top of that, I had to witness numerous cruel scenes of imps killing each other. And those weird stares that these bunch of homosexuals keep giving me Ive had enough. I want to return to the surface. Back to the western human realms! No matter what, I want to return home!
If a potato tries to stop me, Ill bury that potato! Even if I was to die, I want to die on human soil!
Beautiful, dazzling, noble, determined, resolute, fearless, saintly In the face of my anger, One-eye suddenly knelt down, his sole eye tearing up. His eyes blinked furiously as if I was radiating light at the moment.
Hey hey! Whats the matter with you!? Why are you kneeling!?
I just scolded you, why are you kneeling before me? Exactly whats going on here? Dont tell me you are the legendary masochist?
III think Ive fallen for you One-eye threw me a worshipful look as he continued kneeling. You are just too perfect, IIyou must accept me as your subordinate
Me:
What the heck! I know I should be happy that someone is swearing their allegiance to me, but why do I feel like I just swallowed a hundred flies!
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