Soul for a Girlfriend?

249  She didn't Know

She was alone. Her hairs were fluttering around in the wind, as there was a cheerful smile on her face. Her voice sounded soft as usual and she was wearing a winter cardigan, which was a bit oversized for her.

She came to a stop before me and looked at me with her ember eyes, which were reflecting the sunlight. I glanced at Tsūmen once, and asked her, "Ahh… what's up?"

"Can we walk home together?" She asked me, as I was a bit confused. I glanced at Tsūmen and said, "I mean…"

I was hesitant because she hadn't told me earlier about it. I was about to walk home with him since we hadn't got much time to talk. But it seems like it was a rather difficult situation.

Friend or Girlfriend?

I could see Tsūmen glancing at her a

While she was also looking at him. I knew the fact that he didn't like Shiraishi at all. It was quite a sticky situation for me. "Ah, I'll catch another time then. See ya!" Tsūmen slapped my shoulder playfully with a huge smile on his face and walked off while waving his hand. "Who was that?" Shiraishi asked me as we started walking. I looked over my shoulder once, and replied to her, "My friend."

Tsūmen was always a considerate person. Though he might act silly when he is with me and Gaisen. I never understood how we ended up becoming friends, but he was the first person I ever opened up to.

He knows me too well.

"He is quite good looking." Shiraishi said to which I glanced at her and nodded, "I know, still he is single somehow."

"You know… just because he is handsome doesn't mean he will automatically get a girlfriend."

"I know, that was just a satirical dialogue."

"So, how was your day? Did anyone else tease you?" I asked her, since I was curious about the aftermath of that incident. She was staring towards the ground, while replying in a vague tone, "No one did."

"You don't sound pleased though."

  "Adacchin was really uptight about it, that's why." She said, looking at me with a wry smile. Her reaction was something to be confused about. She didn't sound delighted at the fact that her friend was standing up for her.

"She is just looking out for you." I replied, but she grabbed my hands and came to an abrupt stop. I turned towards her and noticed her staring at me, "I know! But you don't understand…"

Letting out a breath, I looked at her and said in a soft voice, "Tell me about it then."

She stood there in silence. I leaned down a bit to match our eye level, and said, "See, if you aren't comfortable then I won't force you."

"No... it's not like that." She replied immediately, letting go of my hand. I glanced at her hesitation and decided to push her buttons. I was definitely a horrible person for doing that.

"You still think people would…" Narrowing my eyes, I was about to say something, but she interrupted me with pure contempt in her voice. Her eyes illustrated her disgust while she rolled those words off her tongue, "Yes! Can't you see it yourself, how they treat me? I hate it! I hate it so much!!"

"Wasn't that just one person, though?" I asked, trying to calm her down a bit, but it backfired. It just annoyed her more, as she yelled at me, "You don't understand! You'll never!"

Her face was red, and I could see tears forming on the edge of her eyes. Averting her eyes from me, she said under her breath, "Because it's not on you. You'll never understand how I feel." "To be honest with you, I'll never understand it indeed. I never had to face anything like that." I agreed with her completely. I wasn't really an empathetic guy to begin with. "But let me ask you something." I said, looking at her in a serious tone. Her eyes shifted up at me as she asked, "Huh… what?"

"Wasn't it you who gave them the audacity to do such things?" I started and looked at her as she had this stiff expression on her face. Without considering much, I added, "Wasn't it you who allowed them to say such things with a mask called jokes?"

"You think I liked doing that?" She asked me with a trembling voice.

"Did you tell them you don't like it? Today also, it was Moriko who stood up for you." I said recalling the events of the morning. She didn't say anything but kept quiet as I raised my voice a bit, "Why can't you stand up for yourself?"

"It's easier said than done." She mumbled, but I knew that she had no idea what she was talking about. Narrowing my eyes, I continued, "How come they stopped when Shig and Moriko stepped in?"

"I don't know."

"How come he apologised to you?" I won't be referring to his group since they weren't participating with him. But since he apologised, it meant that there was room for negotiation.

"I don't know."

She didn't know. But yet she wanted us to understand.

Selfish.

If she wasn't my girlfriend, then I wouldn't have kept up with her bullshit. But I was slowly getting a better idea of what her problem might be. She was insecure.

"See, it's after all something that's directed at you. So at the end of the day you'll have to fight for yourself." I said, but looking at her face, I could tell that we weren't getting anywhere. She was stuck on one thing.

"Me or Moriko won't be..." Before I could finish my sentence, she walked away without saying anything or looking back at me. I kept standing there while watching her figure walk away from me.

I wasn't sure, but at that moment, it seemed like everything was going way too smoothly.

Seems like it was the correct time for me.

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