Sorcerer’s Handbook

Chapter 419: Chaotic Shopping Book

As Ashe, Sonya, and Deya sat in the sports car, glancing at each other with the Heroic Soul Legion’s countless troops chasing them, they couldn’t help but wonder: How did it ever come to this?

Half an hour earlier, Ashe had discovered a golden area labeled “Don’t miss it, once you pass by” on the virtual realm map. Upon entering, they found a small café, where three books and three cups of coffee appeared on the table, matching their number.

Ashe initially thought it was “Fate Questioning,” but upon opening the book, he realized it wasn’t. Instead, it was an even more love-hate virtual realm mechanics—the “Chaotic Shopping Book of Blessings and Curses”!

“Congratulations to every spellcaster who opens this book. Your luck is unparalleled, and your destiny is about to change. You are light, you are electricity, you are the myth of the future!”

“This book is compiled by the ‘Dramatic Poet’…, Please remember this name, for… is the narrator of fate, the wielder of the power of contradictions, the director of countless joys and sorrows, the witness of the world’s separations and reunions.”

“Millions of Spellcasters in the Virtual Realm are not even half as great as…!”

“The following purchase rules must be observed for this book—”

“① Each blessing or curse has a price. For every blessing purchased, you must endure a random curse of the same price, and vice versa. Fair exchange, after all.”

“② Blessings and curses chosen by the spellcaster will not cancel each other out. You can eat feces and excrete rice, or eat rice and excrete feces, but eating them together won’t neutralize the excretion process.”

“③ Random curses only last during the virtual realm period and will not affect reality; random blessings only last in reality and will not affect the virtual realm.”

“④ After opening this book, you must purchase at least one blessing/curse, but there’s no shopping limit. Don’t miss it, once you pass by.”

“⑤ As a shopping tax, this book will extract personal life experiences from the spellcaster to generate new blessings/curses. There are only two unavoidable things in life: eating and paying taxes.”

“Please note, don’t think you can exploit loopholes by choosing all powerful blessings to resist curses. You might step outside and be cursed with ‘Thinking will turn you to stone,’ instantly turning into a statue. If you chose the ‘Immunity to Petrification’ blessing, the curse might change to ‘Thinking will turn you into a Lala Fatty.’ In short, if you dare to take advantage of me, I’ll wipe out your entire family.”

“But don’t be too afraid, the ‘Dramatic Poet’… isn’t some great villain. This is a benefit for the younger generation. So, for the first-time spellcasters opening this book, if your curse points ≦ 10, your random curse will end in this virtual realm exploration; if your blessing points ≦ 10, your purchased curses will end within 72 hours in reality.”

It’s you again, the nameless Dramatic Poet!

This was the only strange spellcaster Ashe and the others knew who could leave a special mechanism in the Virtual Realm. The “Legendary Library” that Ashe and Deya encountered last time was also his creation, but unfortunately, Sonya had written a leave request that night and wasn’t able to come.

Later, Ashe asked if there were many special mechanisms left by legendary spellcasters on the Time Continent. The village girl shook her head affirmatively, saying that the Dramatic Poet was indeed the only one who left mechanisms on the Time Continent.

While it was true that the Dramatic Poet was extremely powerful, what truly made him remarkable was his ability to return to the Time Continent. After all, spellcasters who could affect the Virtual Realm were at least legendary, if not Demigod Angels or even Divine Sovereigns. However, these powerful beings found it extremely difficult to return to the lower level beginner’s village of the Virtual Realm.

This was also a protective mechanism of the Virtual Realm. Otherwise, the appearance of a strong individual who enjoyed “cutting down seedlings” could easily annihilate all novice spellcasters worldwide.

The fact that the Dramatic Poet could leave so many mechanisms on the Time Continent indicated that he could almost freely move in and out of the second layer of the Virtual Realm, or at least the cost was very low. So spellcasters were very curious about what kind of sins the Dramatic Poet must have committed to be wiped clean of even his name.

However, not all of his mechanisms were beneficial. The “Chaotic Shopping Book of Blessings and Curses,” for example, fully showcased his twisted sense of humor, making people sigh and wonder if letting the Dramatic Poet live would only make rice more expensive.

As Ashe and the others opened the Shopping Book, they saw a dazzling array of options:

Physique: “Die suddenly anytime +30, weak and frail +10, resistant to all diseases -10, limb regeneration -30”

Wisdom: “Cannot avoid rain +30, intellectually disabled +10, clever and witty -10, insight into truth -30”

Luck: “Choke on water +30, no toilet paper +10, everything you wish for -10, destiny’s favor -30”

Charisma: “Repulsive to gods and ghosts +30, pollute the air +10, universally adored -10, calamity of all races -30”

These were options targeting the spellcaster’s attributes in a more conventional way, but there were many more peculiar blessings and curses—

“Beautiful Life -10: Everyone and everything appears beautiful to you, all landscapes are worth stopping for, and you never have a bad day.”

“Misanthropy +10: Even watching someone breathe makes you feel like the world is doomed.”

“Hear Inner Voice -10: You can vaguely hear others’ inner thoughts.”

“See-through Illusion -10: You can’t truly see through objects, but you do see what you want to see.”

“Mortal Danger Sense -10: When in danger, time seems to slow down for you. The greater the danger, the more time decelerates.”

“Temporal Confusion +30: Your sense of time is completely thrown off. Today is the 3rd, tomorrow is the 9th, and yesterday was the 21st. Haha.”

“Foresee Death -30: You can see how you will die.”

Although these blessings and curses were strange, they were somewhat understandable. However, there were many more that you couldn’t categorize at all—

“Childhood Friend -10: Within three days, a childhood friend will find you, with similar strength to yours, but your relationship will remain just friends.”

“Lover -30: Within three days, someone who perfectly fits your romantic tastes will appear, matching your strength, and will love only you in this lifetime.”

“Enemy +10: Within three days, a hated enemy will appear, with similar strength to yours. They will align with everyone who dislikes you to take you down.”

“Sincerity +10: If everyone in a place is sincere, is it heaven or hell?”

“Chat Channel -30: You will join the Chat Channel created by the Dramatic Poet, allowing you to chat with anyone in it anytime, anywhere.”

“Blade Fish Dragon -10: Every time you enter the Virtual Realm, a Blade Fish Dragon will appear next to you, fully obedient to your commands.”

“Random Race +10: You will transform into a different random race.”

“Beautiful People Don’t Poop -10: Your waste will be transferred to another person for processing.”

“What the heck is all of this…” Ashe said, feeling a headache coming on. “If you’re already transferring the waste, why not just send it to the sewer instead of into someone else’s intestines!?”

“Maybe it’s a way of respecting the poop,” Deya speculated, “but Observer, why do you even care about this? Are you thinking of choosing it?”

“They say people spend half an hour every day on this… if I could save that time…” Ashe pondered, “But what about ‘childhood friend’ and ‘lover’? If I choose ‘lover’, does that mean someone who likes me will just appear out of nowhere?”

“It could also mean the Sword Princess will appear by your side,” Deya mumbled very quietly.

“What?”

“I was saying, why isn’t the Sword Princess speaking,” Deya said, looking at Sonya, who was staring at the Shopping Book like a village girl dazzled by jewels. “Sword Princess, did you find something?”

“Sincerity,” Sonya muttered softly.

“What?”

“Sincerity!” Sonya looked up at Ashe. “The blessings and curses are just on the surface; they’re essentially like the Summoning Ritual of sincerity!”

Ashe was momentarily stunned, then suddenly realized something and began to study the Shopping Book closely. Only Deya looked confused—these two lovebirds were having another encrypted conversation!

The village girl also realized she had subconsciously shown too much familiarity and couldn’t afford to appear too close to the Observer in front of others. She then leaned closer to the Witch to explain the Summoning Ritual of sincerity.

The Summoning Ritual of sincerity was the ritual Ashe had forced the Sword Princess to undertake to obtain the spirit of sincerity. During that time, the Sword Princess could only tell the truth until she summoned the spirit of sincerity. Thinking about it, doesn’t that sound exactly like the “Sincerity” curse from the Shopping Book?

According to this logic, most of the blessings and curses in the Shopping Book are actually related to Summoning Rituals of different spirits!

“Wait a minute,” Deya suddenly reacted, “Then ‘foresee death,’ ‘temporal confusion,’ and ‘hear inner voice’—”

“Are Summoning Rituals for spirits from the Prophecy Sect, Time Sect, and Mental Sect, respectively,” Ashe explained. “Both ‘beautiful life’ and ‘misanthropy’ should also be related to the Mental Sect, while ‘see-through illusion’ would likely summon a Reconnaissance Spirit. So basically, the real purpose of the Shopping Book is to let you quickly master a new Spellcasting Sect!”

“But what about ‘childhood friend,’ ‘lover,’ and ‘enemy’?”

“I can guess what ‘enemy’ means,” Sonya pondered. “Your enemy will link up with everyone who dislikes you… meaning if you keep an eye on your enemy, you’ll know who holds a grudge against you.”

“Random Race is very useful,” Deya suddenly said.

“Why?” Ashe asked, puzzled. “I’m pretty happy being human.”

“Not if it’s permanent, of course, but if it only lasts 72 hours, it’s like having a rare experience,” Sonya explained. “Most intelligent races other than humans have their own specialized Spellcasting Sects. Some unique sects can’t even be accessed unless you belong to a specific race, like the Gluttony Sect exclusive to Ogres. You might be able to grasp the basics within those 72 hours.”

“But the most important ones are still the Prophecy, Destiny, and Truth Sects,” Deya said seriously. “These three Sects are nearly impossible to master on your own. You usually need some kind of Adventure to be lucky enough to gain the Virtual Realm’s favor… Yet now, the Adventure is right in front of us: ‘insight into truth,’ ‘destiny’s favor,’ and ‘foresee death.’”

By choosing these blessings, they would be guaranteed to master those most mysterious and powerful Spellcasting Sects.

“But they each cost 30 points,” Ashe pointed out, spreading his hands. “If we choose them, we won’t trigger the Dramatic Poet’s benefits.”

Purchasing blessings will add ‘-‘ curse points, and purchasing curses will add ‘+’ blessing points. If it’s your first time purchasing and the points are within 10, the Dramatic Poet will compress the curse duration to either one virtual realm exploration or 72 hours. This arrangement is highly advantageous for Spellcasters.

But if it exceeds 10 points, the Dramatic Poet won’t assist, and the curses granted by the Shopping Book will become permanent. The consequences would be too severe, akin to choosing the wrong major in college and being stuck with it for life.

For a curse like ‘weak and frail,’ it might still be manageable, but a permanent ‘Random Race’ curse… it’s one thing if you randomly turn into a Bewitcher, but if you become an Ogre, you’d practically need to restart your life. Also, since Ashe is a man, there’s a zero percent chance of randomly becoming a Bewitcher; at best, he might turn into an Elf.

“Wait, why does the Chat Channel also cost 30 curse points?” Deya asked curiously. “Is it some sort of Rare Spirit Summoning Ritual?”

“The Chat Channel itself holds no inherent value; it’s the people in it who matter,” Ashe explained. “There might be weekly gatherings of Divine Sovereigns, Angels, and legendary spellcasters in there. They could be exchanging intelligence and items.”

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