Chapter 45
“……Right, so it was all because of a man, Kim Na-Yool. All because of a man. Wow, okay… I got it now.”
A feeling of betrayal boiling up. The utter dejection he felt about her doing this to him. Like the protagonist of a soap-opera, those were what reflected his empty eyes as he looked at Na-Yool.
Sang-Hoon’s unfairness was annoying, but it was not totally unjustified. No sooner had Na-Yool broke up with him that her whole mind had gotten distracted by Si-Jin, who strictly speaking was a man. So if she had to say, there indeed was a man. But it would not change anything even if there was not. The hundreds of crazy messages she had received on Sunday night had made her forget everything. The good memories, the bad ones, all of Sang-Hoon’s existence. Na-Yool snorted again.
“But again, what do you even know?”
“Why wouldn’t I?! I know you!”
“If you did, would you be doing this right now?”
“You’re the one being rude and ignoring people!”
“Rude? Did you really lose it? Would you be treating me this way if you were in your right mind?”
“What did I do? Did I wait in hiding and chase you to your house like a stalker? Did I break in to ambush you?—”
“Sure. You did nothing, so please keep not doing anything. Do nothing and disappear from my sight.”
“Who is it?”
In contrast with Sang-Hoon’s red face, his large hand which squeezed Na-Yool’s wrist was white. Na-Yool quickly glanced at it and looked up to face Sang-Hoon with pitiful eyes.
“What does it have to do with you?”
“No one has as much to do with you than I do!”
“Right now you don’t even matter more to me than a passing ant on the ground. No one matters less than you in the whole universe.”
“It’s all because of that bastard, right? That’s why you changed. Yeah… if it was not for a man, your attitude wouldn’t change so suddenly.”
“You, do you have dementia? Can’t remember that you dumped me?”
Na-Yool pinched Sang-Hoon’s forearm once again, but this time he tightened his lips to refrain from screaming. It looked as if he was putting on a brave face. Na-Yool chuckled as she pulled out her wrist.
“Answer me first!”
“How dare you order me around when you’re the one begging to meet!”
Na-Yool ended up kicking Sang-Hoon hard on his shin with the tip of her shoe, who screamed a “Oh, fuck!” despite himself. Just as he reached for said shin, Na-Yool kicked the other one. Sang-Hoon squatted down as he grabbed both sides.
“That’s for spreading rumors in someone else’s company.”
“Are you craz-…!”
“No you are, therefore the kicking. Don’t you ever dare mix private and public matters and come find me here.”
“Then if I go to your house…”
“If you want to be reported, suit yourself.”
When he heard she would report him, Sang-Hoon’s eyes welled with tears in disbelief. People occasionally passing by his damn gentle-looking face would take a look at Na-Yool’s, then Sang-Hoon’s pitiful look.
As Na-Yool looked down at Sang-Hoon’s grotesque squatting, he suddenly stood up with his mind apparently set on something.
“You… I understand how angry you are.”
“If you do then—”
“From now on, I will make more of an effort.”
…This crazy man, what is he saying now?
“Strictly speaking, it’s the same as saying we broke up for a short while—”
“It’s not ‘the same as saying’, we did break up. From the moment you said we should till forever.”
“—I don’t think meeting someone while we shortly broke up is that big of a flaw. It can happen.”
“What are you showing understanding for? Don’t try to understand me.”
“… So there really is another man, isn’t it?”
Forget pretending to be all noble and generous, it took him only a second to flip, unable to hold it in. As if it was not obvious enough that he was a manic-depressive lunatic… He quickly put his gentle mask back on when Na-Yool looked at him with mean cold eyes.
“I’ve always liked you more. So, that kind of thing, I’m used to it. I’ll be patient. I’ll try harder.”
“And I told you it’s not necessary.”
“…Could it be that you were meeting that bastard before we broke up?”
“…Either roll your eyes and complain or act all innocent and pure. Can’t you do just one?”
“……Fuck, if you got with him just after breaking up with me…”
“Stop swearing already!”
Sang-Hoon grabbed Na-Yool’s wrist again, and at the same time, Na-Yool kicked his shin once more. Trying to avoid each other, their bodies swirled around half a turn.
Beyond Sang-Hoon’s shoulder, trembling in pain, something from the large glass windows of a coffee shop caught Na-Yool’s eyes. In the seat by the window, a tilted head looking towards them, its chin leisurely resting on its owner’s hand. The familiar face of a pervert.
Si-Jin waved at her.
Chapter 10 – Friday evening, 9:25 p.m.
Facing the unbelievable reality, Na-Yool’s facial expression drastically changed.
This whole mess…
He had witnessed it all.
Though she remained calm, Na-Yool could only reach that disastrous conclusion. It would be weird if he had not seen it. Was there any better front-row seat to her dispute with Sang-Hoon than this one?
There was a sparkle of interest in Si-Jin’s sharp eyes, as if he had found an unsuspected source of enjoyment. With his twisted personality, it would be surprising if he did not enjoy seeing her like this.
Na-Yool violently wriggled her arm caught in Sang-Hoon’s grasp, but his hand squeezed her wrist even more persistently.
This was the worst situation, the one she feared the most. That someone from the office would end up seeing Sang-Hoon’s thick-skull side. That someone, who also happened to be the sole witness of how half-witted Sang-Hoon concretely was, was just right there.
“……I told you to let go.”
“I can’t let you go anymore. Never, even if I die.”
“Is that so? Then let me go before I push you down on the driveway.”
“You really have someone else? Really? Now that you have someone new to rely on you don’t need me, is that— hey…!”
“Didn’t I tell you to let go before you die?”
“How can you push me for real! Fuck…!”
He was standing in the center of the wide sidewalk, still quite a distance from the driveway.
But as expected from him, Sang-Hoon sighed deeply and stroked his surprised chest with an exaggerated motion as if he barely escaped death. A perfect display of his disgraceful side, as Na-Yool saw it.
Na-Yool resentfully stared at Si-Jin, who was still watching this disastrous moment with great interest. He did not need to help. He did not need to do anything. She was just hoping he would not be looking at them, but alas…
The shame of him knowing about her miserable past overcame her.
Putting aside the recent twist of their relationship, Si-Jin was a superior who always made Na-Yool feel her own shortcomings, and therefore an opponent to whom, whatever happens, she did not want to show her down-the-gutter self.
Even if she sometimes had to swallow back her pride, it was part of the job and just a facade… So it was fine. In fact, there also were many times when it was not fine but got better once it had passed. But this, no facade or waiting could make it fine.
That shameful scene ‒ though she did not really feel ashamed herself ‒ which Si-Jin had witnessed could even countervail the embarrassment she felt about sleeping with him. Even the contradicting desire she felt about being caught every time by him could be countervailed by recalling that scene. Because then, she was not yet hitting rock bottom. But this…
It was about the guy who she, and no other woman, had dated, her dark history…
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