New Life : A Second Chance

Kylie was a fetus. A fetus growing inside someone's womb.

Ever since she realised what was happening, her brain seemed to go into overdrive. This was so much like all those reincarnation novels she read when she was younger. Although it was into one of the less popular type i.e. instead of transmigrating into the body of a person who had been pitifully wronged and died, she had entered into a newly formed life. Reborn, so to speak.

Kylie started thinking. Amazingly enough, she could do that even though her brain was still forming. Was this a side effect? All those novels had the transmigrated or reborn soul have some sort of cheat. They were transported into a body that was thought to be a waste but was in actual fact, a unique body that would speed up cultivation. Even those that were reborn, could use their vast experience from their previous life to get a head start in the new life. Gathering qi and all that jazz.

Her? Kylie sighed mentally. There was no way she was going to be a super human of some sort. Life had been very mediocre. She had been an average student, who didn't quite excel but wasn't too bad. She studied hard, did well enough and so forth. So what about this new life? Perhaps she could get a head start since she had vast experience as an adult before. Primary school would be a breeze. Kylie chuckled at that thought. Imagine. A genius in primary school but becomes a dud in secondary school.

Still, that was for later. Much later. Based from her own experience as a mother in her previous life, Kylie knew that it would be a long time more before she would be born. From the looks of what had been formed so far, she was just about 3 months old in the womb. There is some basic external shape, some brain functions and a heartbeat. Barely 4 inches long, she's like a tiny spec inside the womb.

Kylie remembered an old-wives tale that a soul is breathed into the foetus in the third month. In other words, one only became 'alive' then, and before that, one was only a body of cells. If this was anything to go by, guess that old-wives tale wasn't just a saying. Science could never prove the existence of a 'soul' - that was too abstract and inconclusive.

Kylie wondered briefly which soul was supposed to have been breathed into this little wonder of creation. Did she replace an original soul or was she meant to be reborn? Was being reborn the true ending of death? If that was so, why didn't she remember her past life in her previous life? Or was that her first life?

Then again, it didn't make sense for if being reborn endlessly was the thing, wouldn't more people be aware of it? Or was this awareness of hers a fluke? A mistake? Kylie just got a headache thinking of it. There was no way for her finding out the truth, so there was no point in thinking about it any further. Was there any point to all of that anyway?

Right now, the main thing was the time she had left before being born. There were another 6 more months to go. 6 more months of floating in this endless sea of darkness. Just the thought of it made her groan internally. She was going to be SO bored. Unlike all those novels that she had read, she didn't have any knowledge of any martial arts or had cultivated Qi or whatnot.

Kylie checked herself internally, wondering if there was anything new or different about herself. Nope. Nothing. She didn't suddenly develop a sixth sense to be able to "see" inside herself and all she could feel was … growth, Things being formed. Floating.

Kylie sighed. This body of hers is a normal human being and being able to cultivate is merely fiction. As a last attempt, Kylie even tried to call out, her tiny mouth opening yet no sound coming out. Mentally, she called out, "Hello? Hello? Anybody there? System? Guide? Whatever?" She paused and waited before calling out again, "Hellooooooooo??"

Silence.

Zilch. Nothing. She sighed yet again. This sighing thing is getting addictive.

Kylie began taking stock of her options. She is going to be reborn. She had another chance at life. How many people wished they could have gone back in time and do things differently? Kylie had thought of such things before but also knew that her choices in life had made her who she was. So changing it would mean a different her. So did this now mean she can do those things she wished she did before? In getting a second chance at life, she had a choice. Live as she did before, or be more daring and explore.

Not just that ... Kylie's heart wrenched in pain when she thought of what she had left behind. Rather, who she had left behind. How are they now? What are they doing now? Are they safe? Are they ... coping?

Kylie made up her mind. There were so many uncertainties about what life would be like after she was born. She had the here and now. Six months of floating about without any sense of time.

Amazingly, Kylie found that her memories of her past life were as clear as day. When she thought about it, she realised that her life had always been mediocre. She had been a normal person, with a normal background. She shifted through her memories, and it appeared in her mind like some mini movie. It was a strange thing, but she shrugged it aside as being something normal for a fetus. Not like she knew what was normal, but anything right now was regarded as such!

Science could not fathom the mind, and who knows? Maybe something like the Baby Geniuses movie was actually right! Wait. Did that mean she's going to be a blubbering idiot after 2 years old? Kylie shuddered. Focus. Focus. Think of this NOW. She went back to thinking about her past life.

In her previous life, Kylie wasn't smart but she wasn't dumb either. What she was, was hardworking. She made up for her shortcomings by working twice – or even three times what other people would have done. She had an okay family life as well. It wasn't abusive, and there was the typical strife of all families.

Kylie continued to think about her past. The mini-movie played in her mind as she watched her watching her "life" from a child until an adult. Things she never remembered before were as clear as day in her mind then. Looking at her life as a third person really gave her a whole new perspective.

Her parents had raised her and her two siblings as well as could be, taking into account the circumstances. They weren't rich but they had enough. Her parents weren't the emotional type either. The "I love you" statements or hugging were alien concepts but one did not feel hate. You knew they loved you, but it just wasn't said.

Mother was a petite woman, and fierce. She was strict and had raised them with an iron rod. Not literally, though a belt or a rattan cane would be used as a form of punishment. No slippers though. A slight pinch by twisting the back of the hand or the side was also another form of discipline, normally given in public places but done without anyone else any the wiser. Rules were to be followed. There were strict protocols.

Kylie flinched at such scenes, even though she wasn't going through them at the moment. Such punishments weren't really painful as it never left a mark on their skin, though it did sting. She still didn't like seeing the scenes though. Still, she had never felt hate either from her family or towards them, and it didn't affect her negatively like some of the research had often said to cause.

Yes, yes. All sorts of reports and psychological research were done about the detrimental effects of physical punishments were still in high debate during her time, and Asian mothers or parents were labeled as abusers by the Western side of the globe.

Still, she didn't become some sort of deranged, self-conscious or what-not person because of it. Despite that, it didn't mean she believed in using such methods on her own children. Kylie shook her head at that random thought and focused on watching her past life again.

Father was tall and dashing, but always working. He had left the disciplining and raising of kids to Mother. It was only in the later years of his life that he tried to reconnect with the family, and Kylie felt closest to him than her own mother. Kylie smiled at that thought. She never truly lacked anything, though there were no luxuries, she had everything that was needed. The only thing she wished she had, was some sort of connection with her own mother.

Her own mother never truly understood her, and thus, Kylie always felt something was missing. She didn't hate her mother and she DID love her mother ... but she honestly could not say whether such love was the love borne for a mother. If her mother had died before she did, would she shed any tears? Kylie could not say.

Kylie sighed yet again. When she thought of her previous life, and as those memories flashed through, she realised one depressing thing. She didn't suffer from life … but she hadn't truly experienced life either. Everything went as if it was programmed. School. Graduate. Job. Get married. Have kids. Grow old. Die. Well, other than the growing old bit, everything went by smoothly. Like routine.

In short, boring.

Kylie felt that the only time she felt alive was when she gave birth. No, not 'alive' but more like, 'of value'? Her children had given her a sense of belonging, which no one could take away. She felt needed and was loved unconditionally. That may sound strange, but that's how it was. Her parents loved her, but she always felt it had a condition: be good.

Her husband loved her, but it was the slow-not-showing-anything-more type of love. With her kids, though. They accepted her wholeheartedly and loved her no matter what. Her life had been theirs from the moment they were born, and she would have done anything to ensure their well-being.

Hence, the thumbdrive incident.

Kylie jerked at that thought and the scene in her mind shifted to the incident. Of how she discovered a discrepancy in the company accounts. How their most trusted relative was working in the background. Worse, of the underground connection that he had and used the company to 'clean' some things for them. It had taken her months of quiet surveillance before gathering all the evidence that she could. The thumbdrive contained all of that.

There is nothing she could do about it now. The intense feeling of regret of her previous life didn't get less. In fact, it was just as strong if not stronger. It wasn't that she regretted her past actions. Rather, she regretted not being clever enough at not being caught.

To have been caught, then hounded, tortured and eventually killed just for that. A brief moment of heroism, something she had never done in her entire life which got her killed in the end. She didn't think it was such a serious matter that it would have warranted her death.

Now that she thought about it, it was strange. What was so serious and special about the data she had? Was there something more? Something worth killing for, obviously. Now Kylie was afraid. Afraid for her children's life. What if they went after them instead to find the thumb drive? Would they also kill them for it?

Kylie had no idea that the house had been burned down, but she knew that they would have never have found the thumbdrive. Simply because it wasn't in the house at all. It was at the most unlikely spot, thus, the safest spot since no one would have considered that possibility.

However, though they would be safe from people harming them in an attempt to find the thumbdrive, they weren't safe from the snake in the grass. Until they grew up though, they may still be safe. She hoped so. She prayed that it all boils over and nothing comes up from it anymore.

With that, Kylie began to think even more. She was filled with resolve. She needed to be better this time round. She needed to be cleverer. First, she needed to know the time frame after being born. Would it be right after her death or several hundred years later? If it was the latter, then there was nothing she could do. If it was the former, however, then she needed to improve herself.

Kylie began thinking hard. Since she actually managed to retain her memories, it meant that she had an advantage early in life. She would work harder than ever and use the first few years to nurture herself. Be something more than she had been before.

Still, she was worried.

She may get away easily during the first few years of school, it's a whole new ball game once you enter secondary school. The subjects the kids are exposed to nowadays are horrible … Kylie shuddered. Despite that, her resolve did not waver. She will work hard. She had to. She had her kids to think about.

Kylie decided to use the time she had in the womb to do some mental exercises. Keep the mind active. Keep the brain that's developing, working. Maybe even get those brain wires more active and she would become a genius! After all, it is said that humans only use a small percentage of their brains. Imagine if they could access everything. It would be like the movie Lucy. Wouldn't that be awesome?? Not the ending though. Just the abilities!

Kylie snickered to herself. Yeah. Right. Like that would happen. With that thought, Kylie got down to business.

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