Never Marry a Man With Two Tintins

Five people went back on the road. Because of the delay, it was already late in the evening when they arrived at their destination. The market had closed so they could only go to an abandoned temple to spend the night in.

Cheng Nuo looked curiously at the gods of this world. The statues enshrined in the temple were three men who were two meters tall, one of them was quite muscular.

Liu Guang was aware that Cheng Nuo didn't know some basic common sense, so he told Cheng Nuo the history of these three people. It turned out that the three men were all legendary martial gods of the continent. The town residents donated money to build new temples, so the old one was abandoned, and now it provides them with a place to live in.

There are no religions in this world. The residents only believe in the strong.

Liu Guang, somewhat depressed, pinched his tiny arm, and said to himself, "sooner or later, I will be taller than them."

"…" Cheng Nuo looked at his head which was less than 1.4-meters high and felt that this goal might be a bit hard to reach.

Liu Guang knew that his future wife liked to stay clean. He picked a corner and spread thick straw on it. He made Cao Tou and the others stay on the other side. There was a well behind the temple. Liu Guang went out for a while and found a metal bucket somewhere. Drawing water from the well, he let Cheng Nuo clean up a little.

The other three children watched, stunned. They were used to Cheng Nuo these days and knew that Liu Guang was taking care of the newcomer, but they hadn't known that it had reached this level of waiting on him. They all wondered if they had gone blind.

Cheng Nuo paid no attention to anyone. He washed his face with the towel he had made then used it to wipe Liu Guang's face.

Liu Guang stood with his eyes closed, and when he opened his eyes he saw the three pairs of eyes looking at him, bright with astonishment. He snarled out: "What are you looking at? Do you also want to wash your face?"

Cao Tou and the other three hurriedly lay down. Liu Guang snorted and sent the bucket out. He returned to lie down by Cheng Nuo's side like he always did.

After a day's journey, the children were tired and soon there was a deep, shallow, regular breathing in the temple. Exhausted by the day's thrilling adventure, Cheng Nuo thought he wouldn't be able to sleep but in fact fell into a deep, dreamless sleep.

The next day they woke up early. Liu Guang took the few things he had saved. Before he had left the house, he had made up his mind to let his future wife eat well.

However, the town only had a few ordinary inns and restaurants. Liu Guang checked them out but wasn't satisfied after looking at five or six of them. Cheng Nuo hurriedly pulled on his hand and said, smiling: "Please take a bite, and sell the things later."

Liu Guang just nodded. Finding a good place to eat wasn't easy since most of the restaurants were full of people from the Jianghu.

(TN: 江湖 - rivers and lakes; jianghu. It refers to a fantasy world of martial artists who live by their own moral principles, outside of the law.)

A man armed with a long sword looked at the children who were carrying bamboo baskets and wore tattered clothes. He frowned and complained: "Ugh, stinky! They're making me lose my appetite! The owner should drive away these beggars!"

A big fellow beside him said: "Just look at them. They're definitely from that dog kennel."

The slums near the interspatial garbage dump was called "dog kennel" by outsiders. Cheng Nuo didn't know about this but he could guess the meaning from Liu Guang and the others' angry expressions. He quickly leaned closer to Liu Guang and whispered: "Xiao Guang, don't mind them. Let's go somewhere else."

(TN: 小光 - Xiao Guang means "Little Guang.")

Liu Guang gritted his teeth. Finally, the ruthless glint in his eyes disappeared and he allowed Cheng Nuo to change places with him.

However, Liu Guang memorized those two people's appearance. If they were to ever meet by accident and they fell into his hands …

Cheng Nuo secretly breathed a sigh of relief. Liu Guang's temperament wasn't good. The two bandits, Shang Wu and Zhu Liu, that they had met before could only be regarded as small fries. If they were to encounter strong fighters, Liu Guang would likely get the worst of it.

When they had walked some distance, Liu Guang suddenly thought of something and looked displeased: "What did you call me before? I didn't hear it!"

Cheng Nuo had called him "Xiao Guang." He knew that Cheng Nuo did it to remind him that they were in a difficult situation but now that he thought about it, "Xiao Guang" was something that a child would be called … but this name was also very intimate. Liu Guang's mouth complained about it but in his heart, he felt inexplicably happy.

By this time, Cheng Nuo knew Liu Guang's temperament quite well. He teased him: "You don't like to be called Xiao Guang? Okay, how about I call you Xiao Liu Guang?"

Liu Guang couldn't help but roll his eyes. He panted with rage: "No! … Well, you can still call me Xiao Guang."

They soon found a restaurant in an alley where there weren't many customers. The boss didn't say anything. With a swagger, Liu Guang threw a handful of coins on the counter. This world's coins weren't made of gold and silver; they were made of rare energy ores. They shaped like rings and then they fell they made a nice ringing sound.

After being taught by Cheng Nuo, Liu Guang could read hundreds of characters. He could barely understand the menu and ordered a table full of vegetable and meat dishes. Though the rest of them only liked meat, he knew that Cheng Nuo liked the vegetarian dishes.

Cheng Nuo looked at the coins with a bit of dismay but the truth was that there was no place to spend money in the slums. Therefore, it was indeed better to let these malnourished children eat well today.

Liu Guang's always threw his money inside his old shoes so before they went out, he made sure to wash this money properly.

As expected, the moment they started eating, Cao Tou and the others grabbed the meat and gobbled it down. Liu Guang placed the tastiest-looking dishes and the vegetables near Cheng Nuo. Cheng Nuo sampled them then placed some of them in Liu Guang's bowl until it was full. Liu Guang stared at the bowl for a while, his face slowly feeling hotter and hotter.

.

Cao Tou and the others devoured the food as though they hadn't eaten for days. Cheng Nuo looked distressed and a little amused. He couldn't help but give them some vegetarian food, saying: "Don't just eat meat. You should eat more vegetables."

Liu Guang suddenly got angry and hit Jin Yu on the head with his chopsticks: "****! Eat slowly! I, your father, am eating. Don't take my food."

Liu Guang usually speaks properly in front of Cheng Nuo. His voice was still clear and childish but when he said dirty words, Cheng Nuo frowned.

Cheng Nuo swatted him on the back of his head: "No cussing."

Liu Guang gave him a disdainful look and began to eat rice.

The food intake of these children was very alarming. One by one, a dozen dishes were completely devoured. Not having eaten such a sumptuous meal for many days, Cheng Nuo couldn't help but stuff himself full of food.

They quickly left the restaurant then went straight to the marketplace. It was around 7-9 in the morning. More and more people were arriving.

Liu Guang spread out his wares and some people immediately came to look at the skins and herbs. He had been to the market many times so he knew the prices of goods. He quickly sold some of the contents of his basket. Chang Chun was selling items next to them. By noon almost everything had been sold.

Cheng Nuo thought that it was interesting to sell things. When there was a sale in his college, he was too embarrassed to open his mouth. Here, it was just a matter of course. When it came time to bargain, Cheng Nuo made Liu Guang's eyes almost pop out of his head.

The money that they made was generously handed over to Cheng Nuo. Liu Guang crossed his arms over his chest and said impatiently: "If you see something you want to buy, buy it, okay?"

The old man Ge always gave his money to his wife so Liu Guang thought that was the right thing to do.

Cheng Nuo was stunned. He smiled and carefully put the money inside a small bag he had sewn: "Alright, then let's look around to see what people are selling."

This world's coins were of three kinds: level one energy coins, level two energy coins, and level three energy coins. A level two energy coin can be exchanged for one hundred level one energy coins and level three energy coins can be exchanged for one hundred level two energy coins.

A bowl of noodles costs about three level one energy coins. A chi locust hide can be sold for ten to twenty level one energy coins. Liu Guang had five hides this time and if they were sold, he would have seventy to eighty level one energy coins. Old Ge had also given Liu Guang around a hundred herbs to sell in his behalf. All of the money was entrusted to Cheng Nuo so his small bag was really heavy.

As the two of them were speaking, a familiar figure carrying a bamboo basket slowly appeared in the distance. Cheng Nuo suddenly froze. Bai Rui unexpectedly came to this town too!

Unlike them, Bai Rui was alone. He walked slowly with his bamboo basket on his back and, even though he was only a child whose clothes were full of patches, he still looked cold and aloof.

Liu Guang saw Bai Rui and his lips curled disdainfully. Naturally, he paid no attention to Bai Rui.

Chang Chun rushed towards them, clutching his stomach, and said: "Elder brother Guang, my stomach hurts! I have to go to the toilet."

"Why are you telling me?!" Liu Guang glared at him. "Don't you know where the toilet is?"

Chang Chun laughed and ran away.

Bai Rui walked to a corner where there were few people, his gaze never straying from his path. He placed the bamboo basket on the ground and Cheng Nuo looked at it curiously. Bai Rui's basket seemed to contain some herbs.

It looked like Bai Rui is also trying to make a living. Cheng Nuo looked at his bright boots and clean clothes. He suspected that Bai Rui had ignored those chi locusts before because he didn't want to dirty his hands by peeling off the hides of those wild animals.

Bai Rui stood as straight as a sword in the corner. Occasionally someone would ask him the price and he would spit out the words in a cold manner. When other people haggled, he ignored it, so the contents of his basket were not sold. Cheng Nuo felt anxious.

Somehow, even though he was threatened by Bai Rui when they first met, he still had a favorable impression of the child.

When Liu Guang went to the toilet, Cheng Nuo couldn't help himself. He went straight to Bai Rui and said: "You won't be able to sell things like that."

He looked down at the basket of herbs that were neatly packed. Though he didn't know much about herbs, he saw that they were quite fresh and the roots were big. These should be of good quality.

Bai Rui's face was impassive as he listened to Cheng Nuo but he spared a breath to say one word: "Nosy."

Even though Bai Rui was a head shorter than Cheng Nuo, he seemed taller. His beautiful golden eyes were full of scorn as he rejected Cheng Nuo's advice.

"…" Veins popped out on Cheng Nuo's forehead. These little brats are really too annoying!

When someone came to ask the price, Cheng Nuo ignored Bai Rui and simply started haggling as though he was the owner of these goods. He quickly earned five level one energy coins.

Cheng Nuo waited until the customer had left and tried to hand over the money. He said: "Here, take this."

Cheng Nuo showed a pair of tiger teeth when he smiled. He looked very kind and lovable but Bai Rui only glanced at him and pointed at something near his feet. Cheng Nuo discovered that a wicker basket had been placed there. Was Bai Rui asking him to put the money there?

So this child didn't like to physically make contact with people …

Cheng Nuo didn't mind and put the money in the basket. He laughed and said: "That's how you sell things."

After two steps, he turned back and said, "If you put a little basket for coins there, people might think that you're a beggar."

Bai Rui's body seemed to be frozen. Cheng Nuo felt more cheerful.

Naughty little children who act cool will get struck by lighting.

*******

Translator's Notes:

• The last line is 熊孩子，装B会被雷劈的 which is basically all slang. 熊孩子 - literally "bear children." It just means little brats/rascals or naughty/disobedient children. 装B - literally "install B" which has two opposite meanings: pretend to be awesome or pretend to be naive. The last part of the sentence just means to be struck by lightning. I non-literally translated it since I think Cheng Nuo is saying that Bai Rui was acting cool but he didn't really know what he was doing.
• Thanks for reading!

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