Chapter 125: 119: Fate or Future?
Something truly shocking had come to light.
I had killed Sona?
Me?
Needless to say, it was incomprehensible.
A nonsensical bombshell.
I would never, could never do such a thing.
Those two were my lifeline, my trusted allies... Although saying such a thing would be a bit too much, it was certainly no exaggeration that I required both of them.
They are, as it stands, a necessity for me to ensure my own safety.
A requirement to feel secure.
I could not for the life of me understand what could have possibly happened to lead to me taking Sona's life.
It simply makes no sense whatsoever.
I had no intention of doing such a thing if I could help it, and I held no expectation that I would need to, either.
So, what was the cause?
Of course, even if I asked, I couldn't know.
I could say that, regardless of the scene in front of my eyes, I will never harm the twins.
But, will that be a lie?
Even if I swear not to lay a hand on them, will I inevitably end up doing so?
Without knowing the cause of the depicted me for doing it, then I cannot know if I will ever do the same.
And if, perhaps, my over-endeavouring to not meet this fate is what exactly leads it to happen, then wouldn't it be better for me to disregard it in the first place?
Then, it won't become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Ah, but then, it would just be a normal prophecy.
Either way, if I cannot discover the reason for myself to kill Sona, there is no way to predict if I will, nor prevent myself from doing the same thing in this timeline.
But, do I even need to prevent myself from doing it?
After all, what if it turns out that killing her is truly the best course of action?
Would there even be a case where it's better for me to kill her?
Just as was said in the scene, Sana could never hate or betray me whatever happened, and if she ever did, then I would only need to place her under an Absolute Contract.
"..."
Sana's question.
Did I feel something from killing Sona?
Something that felt more like an interrogation than an innocent enquiry.
I wasn't sure if hearing the answer or not hearing it would be better, but either way, it looked like I wouldn't be able to find out.
The scene changed for the final time.
"...What?"
This time, it was a reflection of myself.
I found myself in a world that wasn't the hospital room.
In a world of darkness, only I was present.
Not a past me.
Not a future me.
Not an alternate timeline me.
"Just... Me."
My thoughts echoed from my mouth.
I looked around, but there was nothing aside from myself; just a sable blackness akin to the void.
Strangely, it emanated a similar, unnerving feeling to that of Saburou's power.
It looked the same, too.
Was I perhaps...
"Inside the subdimensional space...?"
I couldn't know if it was true or not, but all of a sudden, I found myself in a place starkly familiar to that awful, bone-chilling zone of death.
Well, it wasn't a zone of death to be precise, but it was evident that nothing to enter would ever return.
An example would be Tarou's arm, or now, his entire lower half.
Speaking of which, we left just as he was bleeding to death on the ground.
I imagine that the Wardens, specifically Saburou, would want to take his body for a proper memorial, but either way, it doesn't matter.
Now that I think about it, the same should be done for Avon Laura.
Because, unlike with Kiryuuin, there is absolutely no way for her to survive the wounds sustained from my gunfire, even if they managed to get her into a hospital quickly.
The result of the confrontation turned out to be a one-for-one trade, but as Avon Laura was a higher-value target than Tarou Fushigimi, it could be said that I came out on top in the end.
The end...
I looked around myself once more.
Darkness.
It was different to nothingness in that darkness itself contained some sort of substance to it.
There is also that thing.
A sensation.
The kind of thing where, if you find yourself in a dark room, you can sense that there are objects in that room even if you cannot see them with your eyes.
Like a presence.
That's why it feels unnerving.
Because this space has no such presence.
Where ordinarily one could feel that a space has substance, this space has none of it.
It is merely empty.
Empty and dark.
Some may claim that such a place is, in a sense, nothingness, but is that really the case?
I would argue otherwise.
Even without having witnessed true nothingness through the eyes of Liam Chiba-Wallace, the two matters belong in entirely separate realms.
One is empty darkness.
One is nothing.
The fact alone that empty darkness is empty darkness makes it more than nothing.
Meanwhile, nothing is nothing.
Literally, spiritually and physically.
Nothing can be nothing because there always must be something.
At the same time, there exist places where we assume there to be nothing.
For example, beyond the observable universe.
Or perhaps, the gap between two atoms.
Scientists call that unimaginably tiny empty space a vacuum, but is it truly nothing?
A vacuum is defined as a space devoid of matter.
But, is nothing created simply through the absence of matter?
Even if it is not physical, would there really be 'nothing' there?
A memory of space, an intangible mass.
Dark matter.
Whatever it is, there must always be something.
Because there simply cannot exist nothing.
Does it make sense?
If there is such a 'nothing' that is surrounded by a 'something', doesn't it seem odd?
After all, what prevents the something from occupying the nothing?
Is there some sort of barrier?
In that case, would that not in and of itself be a 'something'?
Looking around at this space that looked like nothing, but actually was something, I wondered.
I pondered, recalling all of the events up until this point.
Measurements.
Supernatural Abilities.
Time.
Space.
Death.
Past.
Present.
Future.
And, of course.
The archive of Forbidden Knowledge in which all of that was contained.
I was in the midst of a journey to uncover that archive.
To reveal its secrets.
Me, the Concept of Truth, possessor of the Measurement of Truth.
Was it supposed to be this way, that the one called Truth seeks to know the truth?
Truthseeker.
It was an alias I had half-heartedly come up with based on the fact I always knew the truth.
But now, it feels different.
Not quite alien, not quite distant, but also not close.
It had me naturally wondering.
Is there anyone aside from me who can even do it?
From the very beginning, was this path one destined for me to walk?
It was an unanswerable question.
Things like fate or such.
I never considered them to be remotely true.
After all, it has always been easy to figure out that the future can change with a snap of the fingers.
But, perhaps I was mistaken.
After all.
When was it determined that fate equalled future?
Avon Laura came to mind at such a thought.
Her Measurement.
It had been dubbed the Measurement of Destiny, but at the end of the day, that name was something I came up with.
It's not like people are born knowing exactly what their Measurement does or what it's called.
The vast majority of people never gave their Measurement a second thought, and those few who did certainly never gave it a name.
That was a habit only I possessed.
Only because I knew what everyone's Measurement did, I bestowed names upon them to make them easier to recall.
Simplification.
Even my own Measurement of Truth.
It's a name I gave to my power.
No one else did it.
I did.
Therefore, it's very possible that I have been wrong about many things.
All I did was give a name to a Measurement based on what its ability seemed to do.
They never had names.
They never had only one purpose.
I was the one with restricted thoughts.
I was the one who looked at the world with such a narrow perspective.
Measurement of Destiny.
It really wasn't Destiny, but the Future.
Avon Laura didn't always see what was destined to happen, but a possibility of what might happen.
Because there is not always only one thing that could or will happen.
I know this now from not just Kiryuuin, but Araceli, too.
There are multiple timelines.
Multiple series of chronology in which our world can run.
My life now is only experiencing one of those lines.
But Avon Laura's power is to glimpse the future of any one of those timelines.
So, could it really be said that fate is unchangeable?
I think that's a false claim.
I think the future can be changed.
But fate?
I don't know.
I'm not sure if fate can be changed because I don't know what fate is.
What is the fate of me, the world, or anything else?
I don't know.
Fate and future.
Destiny and future.
They are separate matters entirely.
With that in mind, what I'm being shown.
Is it fate?
Or is it future?
Sona's death.
No, her murder by my hands.
Is that fate?
Or is it just something that 'could' happen?
Until the time comes, I won't know.
The future can be altered, but fate cannot.
Although mere conjecture, if this is true, then how can I know what events to change and what to embrace?
After all, if there is nothing that can be done to change an event.
If an event is destined to happen, no matter what.
Then, might I as well do my best to prepare?
To embrace fate.
I don't like the sound of that.
I don't like the sound of that at all.
However.
Whether or not there is a choice.
Whether or not I am able to resist.
And whether or not such resistance will succeed or fail.
It's something that can only be known by experiencing the times to come.
And, for now.
I can do nothing but wait.
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