Chapter 183: Heaven Or Hell
Chapter 183: Heaven Or Hell
Erec opened his eyes to a white marble vaulted ceiling; water spun around his body, cold against his skin, but the flow was a slow trickle. It wasn’t comforting like the silver flames. If anything, it was freezing and numbed the feeling of everything around him except the pain. That came from within, and boy did it fucking flare. Before he could even process how much it hurt to exist, a notification slammed into his vision.
Strength: Rank C - Tier 2 → Rank C - Tier 7
Soul (Aspect: Fire): Rank D - Tier 4 → Rank C - Tier 1
Vigor: Rank D - Tier 2 → Rank D - Tier 8
Agility: Rank D - Tier 1 → Rank D - Tier 5
Perception: Rank E - Tier 7 → Rank E - Tier 9
The letters and numbers reeled, meaningless, and Erec raised a hand, swiping at the empty air above, forgetting, for the barest of a moment what any of this meant or why it mattered. His fumbling made it disappear.
“My poor son,” a voice called, one that couldn’t be real. One that was like honey to his ears, conjuring to his mind images of playing as a child in a happy home. For an instant, he saw Bedwyr running around with him in a warm house, swiping at one another with foam swords. Running amok and laughing until a soft voice chided them and told them to get washed up for dinner. It was his mother’s voice. One that he’d never thought he’d hear again.
“You’re not real,” Erec replied, his tongue almost refusing to work. Though his muscles protested, he pulled himself up; the view that greeted him was too good for Earth.
He was on an alcove outside of a villa overlooking a city. The view was stunning, as this alcove displayed the sprawling network of white marble buildings, columns, and feats of architecture that defied the mind. Vines climbed up the marble vines of the alcove, and he saw the streaks of natural blue climbing their way through the city. They were on a mountain or a hill—but down below, clouds rolled throughout the city on the level of roads. On those roads, people roamed, and music rang through the air, softly carried even up here. He couldn’t say why, but this land felt blessed. It had an unspoken feeling of sanctity that Erec only had ever brushed on the rare occasion he’d walked into the Goddess’ church.
The people, from what he could see, were not human. Their skin was a pale blue, and their hair dark. That’s all he made out, from this far away—the blessed children of a utopia.
Past the city, a blue landscape thrived, and tree-sized flowers towered on the outskirts, surrounding the marble city with a floral forest; unlike the blue vines, this giant meadow ranged all of the colors. If he had to guess, some of those petals had to have been bigger than his dorm room.
It took great effort, but Erec wrenched his attention from the enchanting alien landscape to the woman whose voice couldn’t have been real. Isolde, his mother, was sat next to him and very much not a fit for this place. She wore tough hide armor, and the massive sword on her back saw plenty of war; her short-cropped hair was almost the same as when she’d left. Though, now, it was aged, with the barest stray strands of white in it. Her face conjured a dozen of emotions through Erec and the shock of her made him stand up, slipping out what looked to be a small fountain. Water spilled as he stepped out of the cold and into the light of this paradise.
“Hush, it’s fine now,” Isolde said, “Welcome to Eden. That’s what they call this place, a world devoid of war and filled with joy.” There was an almost bitter note to her words, but she smiled through them nonetheless. “Though I have reconnected your soul to your body, I’m afraid it will take some time to heal and rejuvenate. And that’s ignoring the matter of the body itself, which you’ve damaged quite severely. Eventually, that, too, will return to normal.”
“Reconnected my soul to my body…?” Erec asked, growing annoyed with the softness in his mother’s tone. It was like they were back home, like she’d just made breakfast, and they weren’t cast away to some unknown world after years of letting him think she was dead.
Fury started to tug its way back into him—and his whole body gave a shudder. There was a sharp pain in his chest, right where his heart was, as the flames sputtered out. Erec gasped and put a hand to the spot—looking down. His shirt was gone, and carved on his chest was a fire glyph, burning to life on his skin with a silver glow.
“Its… Quite concerning. The form your soul has taken to, sunshine,” his mother continued, using his childhood nickname again. What right gave her the use of that name still? He stared at that face, at that red hair of hers that he’d inherited, at her soft smile as she prepared to launch into what she thought was an awkward topic.
“What the hell do you mean, and why have you been here for all these years—this is where you ran off to when you left us, isn’t it?” Erec snapped, though Fury wasn’t ready to jump to life and flood him with Strength, that well of anger in him was unstoppable.
None of it fit. She no longer had the right to act like his mother. Not after what she did. Fury or not, he would not tolerate it, and regardless of how he ended up here, he wanted his answers.
“It’s like Hers. At first, I was nervous when I found it floating in the between; though it’s normal for our people to have their souls smolder with Her fires, never quite sure how to shed Her from themselves. Hard to blame them when they can draw power from it and not have to rely on their own.” she shook her head. If his being angry bothered her, she didn’t show it. “But no, as I took a deeper look, I realized the obvious: those fires are fundamental to you. And they burn the slightest bit differently. Sometimes, the smallest difference is the thing which matters the most.”
“I don’t care about that,” Erec continued as she side-stepped the questions that mattered. “Why are you here, why are we here—why did you leave us.”
His mother pursed her lips, her eyes sliding around, and he saw it. That was the same face his mother made when they were kids. Right before she figured out how to delicately lie. His mind went back to him and Bedwyr asking her why she’d become a Knight—she’d make that face and then say to them: “For the good of the people.”
But her eyes when she said it had betrayed the truth. Back then, Erec didn’t understand it was a lie. Not until later. Not until he asked his father, long after she’d left, why she’d joined the Knights. She’d been pressed into it by her family to bring them honor. Her father would not tolerate anything other than her acceptance into an Order, his grandfather hadn’t been a kind man, and his mother shielded them from him. When they fell out of grace with their nobility, they never had to talk to the bastard anymore either; he’d cast them off like dirt on his boot.
“Don’t,” Erec said, standing his Fury trying to flare again, once more threatening to smolder out until it didn’t.
It pushed past that suffocating thin grasp between them, connecting the gap between him and it, flooding his veins even though he didn’t will it.
The fire roared to life, a part of him coming back to life. Even if the connection was tenuous at best.
“If you’re going to lie, then there isn’t a point in us talking. You owe me the answer, you owe Bedwyr the answer too, and I’ll tell him what you said here. About you. About how you left. We deserve the truth. I don't want to hear about my soul, I don't care. The only thing I want to know is why you left. Why did you leave us, forthem?” He gestured towards the paradise of the city, fearing her answer but knowing that this was the only way. That without finding it, he could never move past it and grow to be what he needed to be.
“I didn’t leave you for them.” His mother’s eyes were wide, tears starting to well “I would never leave you for them. This place is a heaven, but it wouldn’t be worth leaving you for one instant for myself. I left for you.”
It wasn’t the answer Erec expected, and he didn’t know what to say to that. His mother started to cry, but he wasn’t about to comfort her. After a couple of tries, she spoke again.
“You were in danger when I found out—when my Talent and soul broke free, I could the priests for what they were. What that ritual was. My friend, Olok, let me make the breakthrough. The priests are part of something bigger, Erec. They say they serve the Goddess, but they don’t. The woman they serve was born the day the Goddess seared the Earth with her fire; she lives on even though her body no longer exists. She is their Goddess, not Lavinia.”
“…You—that doesn’t make sense.”
“She sees through their eyes. She lives on in them, latching onto their souls like a parasite when they undergo the ritual. Little by little, she takes from them and makes them more into her, tearing through the fire coating their souls and finding a way in, siphoning what makes them unique into herself, empowering herself. In return, they may call upon her power for their prayers instead of Lavinia. The connection between them grows far faster. It’s a pact. That’s what they take on when they commit to the Church in full: they make a deal with this devil. One day, she’ll kill Lavinia as revenge for what she did to our world.” His mother’s words got darker as she spoke, her brows furrowed and eyes wild. “…Not that the Goddess minds. She celebrates the attempt and welcomes it, playing along with the deception in hopes that this foe grows stronger. Those people are pawns of an evil soul born in the Apocalypse, her roots have infested the Kingdom. I knew if they found out what I knew, if those silver eyes discovered I’d witnessed their secret, they wouldn’t just kill me. They’d bring ruin to everything I treasured. I couldn’t trust myself to keep quiet. She’s not like the Goddess. Not an uncaring woman bent on the thrill of the fight; she loves to torment, and she delights in the suffering of others. Olok showed me the future; and in it, if I’d stayed in the Kingdom, the Church would have taken you and Bedwyr, and latched onto your souls like any other priest, turning you two into shells of your former selves. All while making me watch in chains within the depths of the earth as punishment for knowing her secret.”
She slunk back, her eyes glazing as she looked past Erec to this place. Eden.
“This place isn’t so bad. Olok makes great efforts to keep it safe from both her and the Goddess; neither are fans of the peace these people want to live in. He swore to help me, to take me here, to find a way to save the people I care about from the world once the chance shone through fate. And he delivered. Here you are, Erec, you can stay here. Safe. Your brother—one day, the opportunity will arrive for us to save him, too. Your father… Will be more difficult, but he promised me there is a future where Lac can be taken in, too. Then, once more, we’ll be together, free to live in heaven.”
Erec looked around. At all of this—the beauty of it was straining to the eye. Any direction he looked had natural magic to it that wanted to soothe even the fires of his soul. A life here, a life in what was a paradise, was a siren's call. That had been her plan then. To get them here. She’d made a friend and believed in their ability to navigate the future on the promise of sweeping them all away from the war-torn world they’d come from—it was…
“Bullshit,” Erec said, shaking his head. “I can’t believe you left us, on our own, for so long on the delusion of saving us. I’ve nearly died more times than I can count. Where was this Olok then? You’ve fed yourself a lie for so long it’s sickening.”
“Olok said you would walk a difficult path, but if things truly looked dire—“
“You left for the fear of us and the promise we’d be welcome here. But what have you done to make that a reality? You act as if, in doing this, it was the only choice you could have made. The only one that would save the people you were responsible for. Boldwick called you a great Knight, but all I see is a coward. If you had cared, if you had the fire in you, you would have fought for us. Not sat here, listening to the words of a ‘friend,’ and believing the lies you’ve fed yourself to be content with inaction.”
“You cannot fight something like that Erec. She’s nearing the power of divinity.”
“At the very least, you could have tried. Some things are worth fighting for, even if you don’t stand a chance. Those are the things that matter most because those are the things that are worthy of dying over.” The heat was growing in Erec’s voice, and his mother’s tears had stopped. Her anger was coming to the surface. She didn’t expect her son to be so defiant in the light of her truth. She thought this was saving him, that they’d be together in Eden and live a life of luxury. She expected him to run from his responsibilities like her. “How do I get back.”
“Don’t speak nonsense; you’re not thinking, Sunshine. Your soul looks similar to the Goddess, and the further it grows, the more obvious that will be—that woman will hate you on principle, try to kill you, and there is nothing you can do about it. You’re just one person. She is many. Sit down, breathe; things will be fine with enough time; you’ll learn to love this world.” She said, and there was an almost begging note to it.
It wasn’t out of spite that he would go as much as he might have wanted it to be. He’d gotten what he wanted for so long, and the answer didn’t make him happy, but it did explain. And in doing so, it’d shored up his mind. Her response to the problem was to run and hide, to try to siphon away her family when she could. To Erec, that was irresponsibility incarnate. He wasn’t that kind of person and refused such an option. Because it wasn’t only him that mattered, not even Bedwyr, his father, and his mother. Boldwick, Garin, Olivia, Colin, and Enide—the rest of the Knights, the people of Cavern Seven, the Pendragons—all the people within the Kingdom who saw him as a hero and gave him that title. At first, he’d hated it; he didn’t want anything to do with the weight of all those people depending on him. But that Kingdom, that title, it was his. Those were his people, and to them, he would give his life. Fear from an unknown horror that wanted to rival the Goddess couldn’t stand up to that. Hell, the Goddess herself wouldn’t barr his path.
“How do I get back?” Erec asked, getting to his feet, letting the low flow of Fury keep him steady, even if his body wanted to collapse.
“Stay with me, sunshine. You aren’t leaving.”
“I’m only going to repeat myself once more, and then I’ll do what I have to,” Erec threatened, his eyes glowing red as he let more of that valve open inside. His body strained, a freshly reconnected soul, but if it’s what it took to do what was needed, he’d gladly test that connection to its breaking point again.
“You can’t—“
“Isolde.” A stern voice cut through the chamber, and his mother’s lips shut. “We do not keep people who are unwilling in Eden. This is not a prison. Those who wish to leave may leave, even if we do not keep the door open if they wish to return.” A cloaked man entered, though his hood was down. He had the same blue skin as the people outside and wandering the streets of this city, though the head was covered with a myriad of glowing white glyphs. His face had a welcoming smile as he regarded Erec, but his eyes spoke of sadness.
“Olok. He’s my son, he must stay. You promised me he could stay.” Isolde replied.
“We are creatures with our own will. And we must respect the will of others. Youngling, you would leave paradise?” Olok said, flowing past his mother to stand before Erec, giving a slight bow.
“I would.”
“Then it shall be done. Though note, it is not often we open our doors, especially not to a world ravaged by the fires of war. Those worlds do not change, and in doing so, there is always a risk of violence spilling back into our paradise. Your companions are resting in our halls, but they have not been offered the same chance to stay. It is only by my respect and friendship with your mother that such a rare opportunity is given. But if you’re certain of this decision, it shall be done, but we will not hold a place for you here.”
“I am,” Erec confirmed, firming up. There was a peaceful aura to this man, and he nodded in confirmation to Erec’s words; then, his eyes glazed over for the briefest of an instant as he stared at Erec. The smile slipped into a frown.
“…You will walk a path lined by corpses and blood, one consumed by fire and pain. But it is one you’ve chosen with your own hands and will make of your own will. In doing so, you shall walk with death, yet it does not appear you will walk this path alone. This is not a fate I would hope for any, but we cannot make choices for others, or what would be the point of life? Follow me; we will return to your friends, and you may say farewell to your mother there. Then I shall open the gate back to your Earth… Would you mind providing me with a favor? There is a person there. I believe you’re intimately acquainted with Olfson. I can see a great chance of you two running across one another once more. When you do, tell him he is unwelcome back. That even if his plans were to have worked with that device, he’d have been expelled all the same. The doors to Eden are not open to one such as he.” Olok said and then indicated Erec to follow. With one last look at his mother, whose veneer of control had rapidly broken and was quickly turning into a sobbing mess, he left.
This place, Eden, wasn’t for him. And the sooner he returned to Earth, the sooner he could begin to bring the changes he needed to protect his people.
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