Chapter 255 Shaman’s Breakdown
"A year? That feels a little long." Hearing the time frame that Freja set seemed way too long to Shaman. Especially with the pope making such aggressive moves it felt like it was only a matter of time before the whole continent would be engulfed in war.
"Trust me, I don't think The Pope will be making moves any time soon. Despite getting away he seemed heavily injured and not in a way that can be healed by magic." Freja wasn't certain, but due to the dark god possessing the body of Klaus, there had to be some repercussions from all the divine energy the god had used.
"Well, it isn't like we have a choice anyway." Elysia saw no point in worrying about the time frame. Until they are ready, there isn't much that can be done.
"Mmm, surely there is a better option? I have gotten so much stronger in such a short time, so surely there is something." Shaman wanted to see if there was any way to go faster, but Freja was most likely already giving them the fastest available option.
*Sigh* "Shaman, come with me, I need to talk to you alone." Freja noticed that lately Shaman's attitude has been rather problematic as there seemed to be a superiority complex forming.
"Huh?" Shaman didn't know why, but before she knew it, Freja teleported them away to one of the demon castle towers.
Everyone else was confused about where they disappeared and what would Freja want to talk about. They couldn't tell what recent events would make Freja act in such a way. Himeko alone had an inkling as to why, but she didn't want to say anything yet.
'I hope Shaman doesn't take too much offence to what Freja has to say.'
*
"Why did you need me alone?" Shaman instantly became anxious, feeling like she had done something wrong.
"Is it someth-."
*SLAP* "Shaman, as much as you may think you are the saviour of this world, do not get ahead of yourself. We came from the same world and I remember the feeling of finally obtaining strength." Freja slapped Shaman with a small amount of force that would leave a mark, but not enough to send her flying into the wall.
"I always thought I could be a saviour, the protagonist, the one to rule over everyone, but that is just not possible. I am just one of the few who so happen to have an easier time getting stronger and I can guarantee the pope had gone through the same."
"I'm trying to help you get strong as quickly as possible, but frankly if you think you're some superior being then you will just get yourself killed. The last thing I want to see is my best friend's daughter die in front of my eyes." Freja was stern, showing a slight bit of sadness which was extremely rare. Shaman froze, remembering she had a very similar conversation with Himeko in the dungeon. However, hearing it from Freja affected Shaman a lot more since Himeko was a lot nicer and didn't slap anyone.
"So please, do not fight because you feel like it's your responsibility alone. You may never have to fight the pope at all. Elaina and I are perfectly capable of fighting as well as a few others who are yet to come." Freja took a deep breath hoping she got her message across. There was no need for Shaman to become this trump card against the biggest evil since it just wasn't true.
Even if Shaman and her group were able to be ready in a few weeks it wouldn't change the outcome.
"I… I don't know if I can. From the moment I woke up in this world, I was constantly chased and hunted down. I always had to rely on my own strength to move forward, to save my friends, to untangle the twisted web of schemes. With my system and allies I kept facing enemies both stronger and more experienced, and it was always by our own efforts that we've won… or at the very least survived."
"And yet now I'm… what? I'm supposed to just sit back and let others handle it? Wasn't this why I was brought here? Isn't this what my mother sent me out to do? wasn't this what you all trained me for?"
"If this is not my burden, then I… I don't even know what I'm fighting for anymore!"
The thoughts she had always kept to herself were finally coming out. All the frustration that kept bubbling under the surface, hidden safely so as to not worry Elysia or the others, now out in the open as she laid bare her heart. Hearing Freja's words triggered Shaman to break down as it was the cold truth that she simply could not see from where she stood. That the world managed before she came, and will keep on turning even without her.
Shaman wanted to try everything she could to become strong enough and everything was going well so far. There were a few close calls, but they always managed to fight their way through while getting stronger.
"I'm not saying you are not important. I am trying in all my power to make you the strongest you can be, but I don't want you to fall into this dark pit of hell and end up losing everything you hold dear just because we rushed you." Freja elaborated, further answering a part of Shaman's question.
"Do I still need to fight?" Shaman bit her lip trying her best not to cry, but it was pointless as tears still streamed down her face.
"If you chose to no longer fight, then there is no reason for me to stop you." Freja pulled Shaman in for a hug hoping it was the right thing to do. Comforting was not Freja's strong suit, but from dealing with countless girls crying to her she learnt a thing or two.
"I want it to be over, I want to go home." Shaman smothered herself into Freja crying out what she wanted. It had been a while since she thought about it, but for the first time, she wanted to go home… back to where she originally came from where everything was so much easier.
"That's it, let it all out. I wanted to go home many times in the past, but you need to keep moving forward." Freja slowly patted the back of Shaman's head, trying to sympathise with her situation.
*Sniff* *sniff* "But it's so exhausting." Shaman felt like just dropping everything and running away from it all. That way maybe she could live peacefully with her new family, but at the same time, it didn't feel fulfilling.
"We are allowed to take breaks, I know I have been pushing you guys a lot lately, but there will be times when you can't take a break and I wanted to prepare you." Freja thought she might have pushed Shaman a little too far, but she also figured this was a necessary thing to go through.
To her, you needed to go through your lowest of lows in order to learn how to deal with them. If Shaman hadn't broken down now, it would have been only a matter of time before it happened.
*
<5 minutes later>
"Sorry." Shaman calmed down, but she still hugged Freja while the last few tears leaked out.
"No need to apologise, I just hope you remember that no matter what happens next, you take full advantage of what I got in store for you, okay?" Freja was glad that Shaman calmed down since the others were probably getting worried.
"Mhm, I understand now, although I may be unique, it doesn't mean that I suddenly became the solution to all the world's problems. However, I'm still not quite used to this, trusting others with the important problems, not making everything my personal responsibility… *sigh*." Shaman came to terms with herself, no longer carrying the burden of the world she didn't need to carry.
"That's completely fine, but please talk to Elysia and Clara. Don't try to bare it all on your own when you have 2 perfectly capable girls to be by your side. Plus I'm sure they would love to have you in their arms." Freja smirked as it was clear Shaman wasn't taking advantage of having 2 companions to relax with as of late.
"Well, thanks to you we haven't had time to do anything!" Shaman pouted as it wasn't like she could in the first place.
"Oops, well good thing that won't be the case anymore."
*Sigh* "It better be."
"Now let's head back to everyone, I still have to explain what will happen over the next year."
"Oh true, I guess I didn't really hear you out." Shaman awkwardly chuckled as she didn't even hear the plan yet.
"You will see why I talked to you first before explaining." Freja clicked her fingers teleporting them back to the room they were previously in.
Everyone was still where they sat, but it was clear on their faces they were worried. However, when they saw the blood ball appear with Freja and Shaman inside they were relieved, all except for Elysia and Clara.
They instantly noticed the hand mark on Shaman's face as well as the puffy eyes which indicated crying.
"What did you do?!" Elysia didn't quite jump up, but she was ready to pounce if there wasn't a good reason.
"Shaman has something very important to talk to you and Clara about later, but for now I need to explain what will happen next."
"Please don't worry, it wasn't to hurt me so please calm down." Shaman quickly walked up to Elysia and Clara to hug them both just to reassure them.
This seemed to work for the time being, calming them enough to wait and hear what Shaman had to say later.
"Ahem now let me explain what I want you to do over the next year."
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