Chapter 65 - Explaining 2
"So Shiroe-nee you know what is unrequited love is, right?"I asked.
"Un, I think I understand...it's unfulfilled love."She nodded.
"Good, then let's move on the other painfull love."I sighed, I feel like I'm a teacher teaching a student. But the difference is that the topic is about love.
Although, I taught her about love. I only told her what I know about love. I'm not saying I'm expert, I also don't understand how really love works.
"The last one is Forbidden Love."I paused looking at Shiroe's reaction.
"Eh...forbidden love? Is it the same as us grimoires?"She asked.
"Yes but also No. Your creator forbid you to love doesn't mean it's already a forbidden love. But it will become forbidden if a grimoire fell in love with someone.."I taught her.
"Hnnn, I don't understand. Can you give me an example?"She asked. She doesn't get it? Oh come on, it's simple you know. I sighed.
"Okay, for example. A love between a teacher and a student is forbidden by law."I said.
Shiroe got confused."Why?"
Is she really a genius? She's doing it on purpose right. Calm down me.
"Well, because that's the law. I don't why a teacher and a student is forbidden to fall in love...but I can also understabd why it's forbidden. It would be the favoritism, if a teacher dated a student. That teacher might increase of the student...that's what I understand. I think there is more to it."I said slowly and calmly even though I'm already exhausted mentally from explaining.
"Shido didn't you say everyone is free to love?"She asked a question that made me speechless.
How could I answer this...How the heck should I know. The law themselves decided all of it, not me.
"Ah, you know Shiroe-nee. It's true that everyone is free to love but there are also restrictions. The law was created by the goverment and the people cannot disobey the law, lest they go to prison... But doesn't mean, there will be no one will take the risk."Patiently explaining.
"Hmm, is that so...Humans are really stupid ain't they?"She mumbled loudly.
I nodded unconsciously. Yeah, Humans are stupid. They always teach us, we are free. We have freedom. But yet we live with restrictions, rules and laws. I understand why there are laws but saying we are living freely is a bit inaccurate.
"Well, let's forget about such things... Now that I already explained what love is. I think you already know the gist of it."I said with exasperated sigh.
"I may have understand about it a little bit. There are things I couldn't quite understand... Would you mind answering my questions Shido?"She smiled.
Staring at her eyes for a second. I release another sigh inside my mind. I nodded.
"Okay, let's hear it."I said.
"You said that you will feel very comfortable with the person you love right? Your heart will beat faster if you are near them right? "She asked with innocent expression.
"Yeah, I did say that."I nodded.
Shiroe stared at my eyes. "Then doesn't that mean, I love you?"
I couldn't reply her question. How the hell did she come with that conclusion. She always treated my like a child. I was stunned for a minute.
"W-Why can you say that?"I asked while gulping.
"That's because when I saw you, I feel very happy. Seeing you made my heart beat faster. Sitting beside you is very comfortable. Talking with you is very nice. You teaching me complicated things even though, You look pretty annoyed, but you still continued teaching me...I felt very ashamed pushing you to ask my questions even though I already get it...I feel very warm inside. So I came into conclusion that I love you."She explained.
"S-Shiroe-nee..."I sighed.
"Also, you calling me big sister made my heart flutter with happiness. It reminds me of the past."She smiled sweetly.
"You realize you just confessed to me right?"I said.
"Yes I did."She nodded with a big bright smile.
"Isn't your love a bit too fast Shiroe-nee?"
"Shido, didn't you said. Love is uncontrollable and unpredictable?"She gave me a teasing look with a cheeky smile.
I slapped my forehead, well I did say that. I thought it would take time to make her fall in love with me. But I wasn't expecting this. When I'm explaining her about love, I also have an intention to make her mind. You could say, I'm planning something. But what I didn't expect is her confession.
"Hmm, I think you should contemplate about your feeling first Shiroe-nee. Love is a very important, especially the first love. I would really love to accept your confessions. But-"Before I could continue my sentence I can feel the temperature is dropping low, I look at Shiroe and saw hr eyes became terrifying serious.
"Shido, your doubting my feelings?"She asked softly but her voice consist a very terrifying pressure.
I shuddered, I just realized she was very strong. I unconsciously shake my head.
"N-No! I'm not Shiroe-nee...I just don't want your precious first love to be with someone like me...you know that I already have many women right?"I said with a bit fear.
Shiroe stopped the pressure and listened to my words. She contemplated for a bit and look deep into my eyes. She trace no lies. She felt a bit pain inside her heart. She only knew about monogamous love and taught this practice is very reasonable. So polygamous love is bit knew to her, the thought of sharing her love to other women dissatisfied her.
But looking at the the young man she just confessed. She was very confused why she confessed to begin with. She didn't what's her mind was thinking. The only thing she felt is the urge to confess her deep feelings.
Shiroe close her eyes, she read many books about love. She didn't waste her eternal life without learning everything. It's true she could not experience love because they are forbidden by their creator but that doesn't apply of learning what love is.
She read many books about love. Even naughty books. She understand what sex is and already knew what Shido is teaching her. She just pretend she didn't know. But, seeing Shido a young man she knew since he was a child patiently explain love to her. Made her a bit apologetic.
She already knew that Shido has a relationship with his sisters, aunts and nieces...How did she knew? Well, she accidentaly read his mind. She only wanted to see through his lies but didn't expect to see something made her speechless.
Incest is a Forbidden love that's what she knew. Thinking that the young man ignore the law. She was enlightened. Since a young human disregard the taboo, why couldn't she do it? A higher being at that. So she decide to take the risk.
She have a good feeling to this young man. She decided to try her first love to him. Shido, even though she treated him like a child. He is the only one close to her.
"Shido, I don't care about how many women you have. Honestly, I wanted you to be my first. You are the only man close to me. Although, I still don't quite understand what love is. Maybe in the future I might fall in love with you...so will you accept me?"Shiroe softly said.
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