In Warhammer Fantasy as my ERP Character

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When will you return my effigy to the halfling?

“As per Stirland law, if nobody reports a missing property complaint within a month, the finder can keep it.” Randolf answers. The wish granting effigy almost never leaves his special left hand, even when sleeping. The hand is special because it is where the signet ring of his noble house is. A golden ring carved with the symbol of house Steirmann. A skull looking to the right and smoking with a pipe.

Why one month in particular?

“It is when the complaints are deemed important enough that it stays for a month. The paperwork could be done instantly.” Randolf took a pipe from an ornate box and reclined back to his chair. Then he looks to the right and smokes his pipe. Behind him is a big portrait of himself looking to the right and smoking the very same pipe.

Can you just return it if some halfling looks for it?

“No. All must follow the proper law and tradition.” Randolf answered but with barely concealed contempt. A contempt taught for generations when Emperor Ludwig cut the most fertile land of Stirland to create Mootland. That was more than one thousand years ago.

“So, are you halfling goddess or something?”

Not exactly. I just showed up after some festival and they now worship me because of some association with their goddess.

“So, what do you do?”

I-

Then the door barged open.

“Guerino! You do not just barge into a noble’s office without knocking or prior notice!” Randolf shouts but also makes sure every syllable is pronounced properly and slowly. Making it sounds not exactly like a rebuke but more like a notice.

“I’m sorry master. But-”

“But, I forgive you. I will make sure you do not get fifty lashes because I know you will only barge in case of emergency.”

“It is time for our monthly inspection of Mittlenburg and the Lady is already preparing-” Randolf stops him with his right hand.

“Don’t worry Guerino. I have something in mind.” Then he rubs the effigy in his left hand.

“Wish granting effigy, I wish my wife to not join me on our monthly inspection.”

“My wife is from Reikland. Please understand that we don't share custom and sense of value. No, of course she loves me, she just doesn’t like the way we do it, saying it is dreadfully boring and demanding it to be shortened and throwing tantrums by speaking quickly and pronouncing things with increasingly higher tones.”

Guerino could only look with concern at his master's new antics. He had tried taking away the effigy multiple times including when Randolf was asleep but to no avail. He sincerely hopes this is not another chaos cult or vampire plot again. Just last week he had to silently murder a group of more Tzeentch cultists posing as potion brewer then throw away all their bodies in just one night. He really hopes it is just more cultists because then he can handle them alone, the Undertakers are already busy investigating the sudden deaths in the past two days.

Both Randolf and Guerino arrive on the site of their first inspections. Which is always the city’s vast cemetery site. Randolf dismounts from his robe and meets the Head Undertaker, clothed in an old gray reddish robe with his face fully concealed under the cowl. that is already waiting. Randolf and the Head Undertaker stand five meters apart. Both loudly speaking back and forth. First by announcing each of their long titles. Warden of Souls, Caretaker of Souls, Keeper of Souls, etc. Then the Head Undertaker lists his own, Priest of Morr, Guardian of the Cemetery, Undeadbane, etc. This goes on for at least 20 minutes.

Then Guerino glimpse a movement on his peripheral vision. He turned to Randolf on his right and saw that the effigy’s head moved left and right. Then both undoubtedly looked at each other and made eye contact before the effigy, seemingly just realizing its mistake, turned back to its original position and did not move again. Guerino looks up and sees Randolf does not notice, then looks to the Head Undertaker who definitely notices. Then he and Guerino speak with each other with Undertaker’s secret gestures while keeping their arms on the side.

“Chaos?” The Head Undertaker starts

“No. Vampires?”

“No.”

“Sudden deaths?”

“Unknown. Where?”

“Found. River Aver.”

“Danger?”

“Unknown.”

Ultimately, Guerino is then ordered to secure the effigy as soon as possible as after the inspection is over

The other Valariel returned to Sanctuary. She wants to see where the other effigy she dropped ends up to, possess it, then perhaps find a way back to the other effigies in the Moot. After all, she just needs to follow the river upward. But the view was obscured by something and so she immediately tried to possess the effigy. Only after the nauseating shift from Sanctuary to material world is gone does she notice the fat man looking at her. She still doesn't know if the Daemon allows this on purpose or not as she is yet to return to the Sanctuary for quite a long time. Not to mention the halflings that practically worship her now. Valariel knows that the Daemon share the same name but it still feels weird when the halflings utter the name in worship. She also doesn't know if the Daemon's bid to become a god is possible or not. So many questions and she is stuck in here.

Oh? Curious. What is this?

A wizened male voice resounds within the Sanctuary. Valariel looked for the source in fear and still found no cracks like the previous breach.

Hmmm. A place of dream and death. But I cannot enter.

This time Valariel, runs and grabs a soulforged artifact stored within the sanctuary.

“Who are you!? Reveal yourself!”

Oh? Someone is in there.

Then Valariel saw the window connecting to the effigy she just possessed vibrates violently. As if struggling to block whatever it is from coming inside.

I am Morr

I am Death

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