Chapter 2: Contact.33 The Hottest Day in the Summer
Chapter 2: Contact.33 The Hottest Day in the Summer
“You’re really working hard.”
I was approached by a girl I never met.
It happened after I did five 100m sprints on the track.
Hers was a gentle, sweet voice, like an evening when the day’s heat relents.
I was fresh out of the track, still gasping for breath, and thus unable to respond to her words. She approached me with a towel and I grabbed it instinctively. Was it really okay to use it though? The sweet smell of the softener tickled my nostrils, and I hesitated.
“You’re not wiping your sweat off?”
She asked while I was struggling with my doubts in silence, tilting her head cutely as she did that. Her hair fell on her face as a result, the itch prompting the tip of her pretty index finger to travel the length of her soft face and gather the offending strands behind her ear.
“May I?”
“Of course. That’s why I’m giving it to you.”
The girl smiled, looking bemused, and it made her look a lot more immature. Maybe it’s because the atmosphere around her had lightened up a little.
That smile snuffed out all the concerns in my heart and eased the tension in my shoulders.
Even so, my heart was beating a little faster than usual.
Usually, whenever I would finish a run, I would be panting, feel shattered, and my heart would ache from exertion. I experienced that feeling hundreds, if not thousands of times ever since I had joined the track team. Why then? Why did this racing heartbeat seem a little different, weirdly unlike before?
I couldn’t even tell what exactly was different, in what way the feeling was diverging from the usual.
This… concept, seemed to be called ambiguity.
“I’ll use it then. Thanks.”
“Please do,” so the girl said.
“I’m Shiina Yuki. Nice to meet you”
“Huh? Nice to meet you. I’m Segawa Haruyoshi,” I answered, introducing myself. “Haruyoshi, Haruyoshi…” I heard her mutter my name a couple of times.
“Alright, I’ll call you Yoshi-kun,” she declared out of a sudden.
“Not Haru or something like that?”
“You don’t like it?”
“Not that I have anything against, I just never had anyone call me that before. Simply a little shocked to hear it.”
“Isn’t that all the better then? My own personal way of addressing you. Oh, by the way, just call me Yuki.”
“Yuki-san?”
“Drop the ‘-san’. Just ‘Yuki’.”
“Okay, Yuki. I got something to ask.”
While I was saying that, Yuki looked away from me towards the guys from the soccer team. Seemed like she noticed them ogling her.
“What is it?”
“You’re not from our school, right?”
“…You figured it out, huh?”
The soccer club guys, caught in the act, returned to practice in a panicked rush. “Pass! Yes! Run! Yes! Minigame! Yes.” Their loud voices echoed from the field once more.
“Are they your friends, Yoshi-kun?”
“More like juniors, I guess. We never interact to be honest. I’m from the track team, and those in the soccer team that have been on good terms with me are all retired. I’m a third year after all.”
They’re probably in an air-conditioned room, cramming through the words on the textbooks, and not soccer. For us third years, the term ‘exam candidates’ really was annoying.
It was the middle of the summer vacation.
The intense sunlight of the summer day gave everything a brilliant white tint, preventing me from opening my eyes fully.
The soft, cream-like clouds were drifting across the sky.
The field appeared to be floating, unsteady in the heat haze.
The chirping of well-hidden crickets made the day seem all the more hot and unbearable.
“So?”
“So what?”
“How did you know I’m not a student here?”
“Ah, that’s simple. I couldn’t recall ever seeing you.”
“Yoshi-kun, are you able to remember the faces of everyone attending school?”
The concept seemed shocking to Yuki. Rightly so. I couldn’t possibly remember all the students’ faces.
In reality, not only was I short of knowing the entire school, I didn’t know many of my fellow students. However, there could be no doubt in my mind that Yuki was not one of them.
It was simple really.
She had white skin, hair as fluffy and wavy as cotton candy, high eyebrows, and large bottomless black eyes. She was pretty special stuff compared to all the other girls I had met.
If there was such a girl in school, her debut as a student would have been a cause of a huge commotion from the very start.
Singling out cute girls in the school was an obligatory activity for all the boys, me included.
But I couldn’t explain this reason so blatantly in front of her. “Sorta” I tried to dodge the subject.
“Hm, a failure then. And I even dressed up as a student of this school too.”
“Relax, I’m not telling the teacher.”
Yuki lightly kicked at a stone by her feet making it bounce forward and land a couple of meters away from us. She didn’t exactly seem eager to follow it.
“No, that’s not what I’m getting at. You see, I think I’d be a little happier if you thought of me as a classmate. Can you, Yoshi-kun?”
“What do you mean?”
“I see. So you don’t know.”
That was the moment the 3pm bell rang.
“It’s about time went running some more, right?”
Yuki reached for one end of the towel wrapped around my neck and pulled it away. I felt a little cold without it.
“I’ll wash it and return it to you later.”
“It’s fine. Don’t worry.”
Yuki waved me away, basically telling me to go on. I couldn’t insist any more, so I thanked her and made my way back to the starting line.
I stood at the starting line, and took a deep breath. Before my eyes was a shadow cut out with a shaver, clinging to the ground. I glared at the guy. No matter how hard I tried to sprint, this guy’s always easily making it just before me. I could never catch up to it. It’s like a nightmare. Even so, why am I running?
“Hey,” I heard suddenly. It was Yuki again, wisely sheltered in the shade under a tree. “The third years in the track team should be retiring soon. Why are you still running, Yoshi-kun?”
She had practically read my mind.
I didn’t answer, and merely smiled as I placed my hand gently on the starting line, crouching down in preparation for a sprint. The ground had greedily soaked in the heat of the sun, nearly burning the skin on my fingers. I registered the ready signal in the corner of my mind. BAM. Strength exploded in my legs, and I was off.
All this happened during the summer of my third year in middle school.
This was how I encountered Shiina Yuki.
?
I didn’t like running at first.
During the elementary school I could easily get second and third places at the sport festivals. I guess I should have been proud to come straight after a really fast guy, but my rivals back then had all been similar to me in speed. Results-wise, it wasn’t really a matter of ability.
There was one reason why I had joined the track team, and that was because I had met a classmate called Takeshita.
Right after I entered middle school, we switched seats for the first time, and Takeshita sat next to me, dressed in the same unfamiliar uniform I was wearing.
“Are we seriously wearing this every day starting today? Isn’t this hell?”
Now I truly understood the discomfort of having my neck touch the shirt collar and the resulting urge to scratch away the itch.
For us, who had been wearing comfy, practical clothes, that were easy to move in, over the past few weeks, this uniform was not only too heavy and uncomfortable, but also strangely shameful.
“Yeah. Really want to get rid of this as soon as possible,” I agreed.
“Oh,” he just said, eyes growing wide, before his face exploded with an earnest smile.
I had been a student for six years, and to a certain extent, I got the feeling, “Yep, looks like I can be friends with this guy.”
“Please take care of me,” I said to Takeshita, and shook his outstretched hand.
Takeshita had been a part of the track team since elementary school. Usually, he would be quiet, but when the topic of club activities would come up, he would get really excited.
He would talk at length about how he had beaten his rivals in the last competition, the memories of the summer camp, the harsh winter training with its hateful cold while he loved warmth, the many seniors that he was familiar with, and many other things.
Personally, I had no interest in athletics, but I was invited by Takeshita once to watch the track team.
He was really fast.
Not even the third years could beat him in a 100m sprint.
The way he sprinted… Nobody would think of him as the guy who got an unbelievable 13 points in the language test. His running self was completely unlike the guy who barely an hour before had been trying to figure out how to destroy his answer script while babbling nonsense like “It’s stupid to just burn it, though.”
He was really cool when he ran. Really cool.
The next day, Takeshita happily brought me the track team’s application form.
“That’s a lot more fun than you imagined it would be, right?”
He seemed a little proud when he said that.
“Yeah,” I nodded. It was too embarrassing to admit the real reason though. Well, both of us were guys. There was no need to put everything into words.
I did terribly in the freshman contest, while Takeshita took first on the podium. He kept winning, passing the local preliminaries in first place, and then even making it to the finals in the prefecture competition.
There, he faced many competitors of his own calibre and thus had little chance of winning. Still, the results had many looking forward to his performances next year, or the year after. I remembered him saying “Well, guess that’s how it is,” with a dumb smile, which caused the seniors cheering him on to appear a lot more unhappy.
On the day the third years retired, most of them directed their words to Takeshita. “Do your best.” “You’ll definitely make it to the Nationals.” While the seniors cheered him on with tears in their eyes, “I will.” it appeared Takeshita nodded seriously.
But soon after the second semester started, Takeshita quit the track team just like that.
He never had much interest in athletics to begin with.
His real objective was a two-year older senior, who graduated from the same elementary school.
Takeshita liked her.
But his love didn’t bear fruit.
At the end of the retirement ceremony, the woman of his heart announced that she was dating the team’s vice-captain.
Takeshita, the first year, the fastest in our team, lost to the third year senior who was the slowest. He lost. Even so, he was just smiling. Dumbfoundedly. “Congrats,” he would say to the pair with a trembling voice. Now that I think about it, he had probably been speaking in the exact same manner when he had lost in the prefecture finals.
Even till now, I don’t really know why I was so emotional back then. I just simply couldn’t forgive him for giving up.
“Hey, Takeshita. Are you fine with that? You didn’t fight him for it?”
Takeshita merely laughed in a silly manner.
“Are you just going to keep losing?!” I yelled, really anxious now.
That caused a stir and shocked classmates around us gave me weird looks and started whispering things to each other. I ignored everything, even though I would have usually pay attention to things like that. Back then, it was just noise. It wasn’t what I really wanted to hear. I wanted to discover the true thoughts of this single classmate, this particular buddy on the team.
But Takeshita just gave me another dumb smile and left without a word.
I could no longer find the Takeshita I once admired in that person. All that was left there was the familiar back of the guy who had scored 13 points in that one exam. Not the silhouette of a winner, but a slouching back of a loser.
Two years had passed since that day.
I continued to work hard on the track team. Or I assumed I was working hard at least. After wasting two whole years, I finally arrived at the place Takeshita had reached during his first year. Just like the guy I once admired, I put my fingers on the starting line. The fingertips turned red as they strained under my body weight.
The gun boomed. I stomped hard against the ground. I sprinted off.
I ran my heart out.
And I had no regrets about my defeat.
As an ordinary guy, I made it to the finals of the prefecture. Wasn’t this enough? Yeah. It was enough. Why did I feel so hollow inside, though?
I felt like my lungs would give out at any moment. The endless cascades of sweat trickled down my cheeks and neck. The strong sunlight forced me to keep my eyes shut. Finally, I took a deep breath of the scorching air and looked at the time.
That was the best I ever ran.
The shortest time ever it took me to cross the distance.
But it was still a tenth of a second slower compared to Takeshita’s best.
?
The next day, and the day after, Yuki would come again looking for me with a sports drink or ice-cream in her hands.
Eventually, even though it was supposed to be my juniors’ duty, but before I knew it, she ended up handling the stopwatch.
Yuki called.
“Ready!” I could hear her call.
I gathered my strength in my legs.
“Bang!”
At that moment, I started running immediately.
The start seemed good. My forward-leaning body slowly rose as I swallowed the distance. I felt light. My legs were capable of taking large strides forward. The impact of my feet against the ground propelled my body forward, arms swinging. Yuki appeared to grow increasingly bigger with every step. A painful, burning sensation started to creep in at several points on my body.
I continued to take short breaths, inhaling the oxygen into my lungs.
I gritted my teeth.
My eyes fixed at the shadow before me, I gave chase.
The moment I dashed past Yuki, I heard a little ’beep’.
This was the other side of the finish line.
Did I make it to where I wanted to be?
I slowed down little by little, finally coming to a full stop. I put my hands on my knees to hold my body up. It felt like moisture was escaping me through all the pores of my skin. Ah damn it, it’s tiring.
“Haa, haa, haa. Ho-how was it?” I asked gasping for air.
“Didn’t break your personal best. Just a little more.”
“Ah… Not good enough.”
I had no strength left to stand, so I collapsed to the ground. There was the smell of dirt, a smell unique to the summer and its blazing sun. I felt it stick to my back because of my sweat-drenched shirt. I didn’t care.
The sky was blue, the world white, and the scalding sun was burning my skin.
My body was yearning for oxygen, my lungs gasping for breath, and my heart beating wildly. My chest expanded, contracted, and expanded again. I felt worn out. My mortal shell no longer able to hold my spirit.
“It’s hot.”
The moment I said these words, a shadow covered my face.
“Good work. Have a little rest.”
It was Yuki.
She was holding two PET bottles, one containing an isotonic drink, the other tea. She asked which would I prefer, and I chose the former. I thanked her, sat upright, and accepted the drink.
Thankfully she uncapped it and I was able to drink it immediately. I gulped down about half of the bottle at one go.
Yuki made sure not to sit down as she crouched close to the ground, helping me cap and uncap the bottle. “Smells like a boy,” she said with eyes narrowed as though looking at the sun.
I brought the PET bottle to my lips once more, and this time I drank slowly. My sore throat throbbed as the icy liquid flowed down the gullet.
“Lying on the ground? You don’t care about your clothes or hair getting dirty, do you.”
“Well, yeah. I don’t really care about that.”
“Isn’t it a natural thing to do though?”
“You find it dirty?”
“Well, it’s okay, right? I actually think it’s pretty cool.”
I randomly recalled the morning weather report, where the weather lady reported that it would be hotter than yesterday, or something along those lines. I finished the drink and stood up.
“I’ll go wash my face. Go rest in the shade, Yuki.”
For some reason, my throat felt more parched than before.
I went to a sink in the courtyard, where fewer people were at.
I washed my head under the faucet to cool myself down. It felt heavier once my hair got wet, but I felt a lot fresher compared to before. Then, I quickly washed my face. The water mixed with sweat tasted a little salty in my mouth. I gargled, spat the liquid out, and left the place.
I lifted my wet, bundled hair, and rested a little in the shadow of the classroom block. “Haa.” I let out a long sigh.
I leaned my back on the wall and closed my eyes recalling Yuki’s smile. “I think it’s pretty cool.” Her voice echoed in my mind again and again. Each repetition would make my heart feel happy, and at the same time, anguished.
I knew I should be focusing on running and I wondered what was going on.
It was the first time I experienced feelings like these. Even now my face was still scalding hot.
After a while, I opened my eyes, and saw a familiar face pass before me. The person was giving a very gloomy vibe, just compared to her usual aura. She was the most famous person in school. One who really shone during the summer competitions.
Rindou Akane of the swimming team.
“Eh, Akane? What are you doing here?”
The moment Akane heard my voice and noticed my presence, her expression changed faster than the turning of a page. The gloomy face from before was buried deep within her heart, and she was showing her usual cheery face.
“Hm? Ah, it’s you, Haru. I’m resting. I left something in the classroom. Going over to pick it up.”
“Nyahahaha.” So she laughed, but well, it’s obviously a lie. There was no way she could be headed to the classroom block in that getup.
She punctuated the sentence with a laugh but, well, I could tell she was lying. There was no way she could be headed to the classroom block in that kind of outfit.
She’s wearing only a school swimsuit.
She was only wearing a school swimsuit.
Functionality and design wise, it was the worst design ever. No matter the gender, nobody liked these swimsuits. The cyan colored swimsuits turn black after absorbing water. She was soaking wet all over her hair and body, and clearly she had not dried herself with a towel. Her short hair gathered a little bit of water, and the water droplets fell, gliding down the skin receiving them, before landing on the ground.
“Something happened?” I asked.
“…No. Everything’s okay.”
“I see. Well, if anything happens, give me a shout. I can hear lend you an ear for a bit at least… Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I’m a little shocked,” she said. “Never thought I would hear such words from you, Haru.”
Well, I had to admit that might not sound like something I would usually say.
“It’s summer you know. Honestly, I do feel a little weird myself… Actually, nevermind. Forget I said anything.”
“No need to be so embarrassed. Still… Guess you’re right. I’ll just say what’s on my chest.”
Akane changed her direction, and joined me in the shade.
She ended up at that baffling distance from me, completely within my grasp, yet just barely out of reach of an outstretched hand. I could smell salts from her body. No, it was the smell of the swimming pool.
Like me, Akane leaned on the wall and, like me again, she sighed deeply. “Ah, it’s so cold,” I could hear her muter. She took a deep breath and I thought she would say something then, but the silence continued for a while.
The summer air brought the sound of wind instruments from somewhere. I looked around, and eventually found two girls in the window on the second floor corridor playing trumpets. The high-pitched melody drifted towards the lush greenery of the summer.
Once the performance ended, Akane spoke up at last.
“Well actually, I can’t really say that something happened. I just can’t bring out the motivation I had before. When I made the Nationals in the last tournament, I made a new personal best, and just feel a little burned out. Just today, the teacher asked me to guide the juniors, but I …”
Simply can’t swim like before.
Her voice trailed off at the end making the last words almost inaudible.
Akane expressed her feelings clearly. And I just muttered, “It’s fine.” I knew that she was looking at me, but my attention was still firmly at those two girls from the wind instrument club. No encore was coming yet.
“It’s fine because, well… You are still swimming Akane, right?”
“Swimming’s a habit of mine, like toothbrushing. I feel a little uneasy if I don’t swim.”
“Right. So the light’s still there. It may become smaller, harder to see, but it’s not put out. I’ll say this as many times as I need. There’s no doubt you can go to a further place, Akane.”
Akane was different from Takeshita and me.
She was swimming for real.
Though I never would voice that sentiment aloud.
“…Feels like you’ve changed, Haru.”
“How so?” so I asked. “Back then, you wouldn’t say such things.” So she replied.
“If it were the old you, Haru, there’s no way you would have greeted me if I haven’t noticed you. I don’t know how many times I’ve been ignored by you. Even with everyone around, you would just stand by the side and watch everyone. You would then give some ambiguous lines with some really fake smile. That was different though. I know. These were your true thoughts, Haru. This might be the first time you’re saying what you really feel. So, hm hmm…I’m a little happy.”
“I blame the summer. It’s so hot out here that I’m not thinking straight and keep saying weird stuff. Sorry.”
“I say, you don’t have to be so embarrassed. Hm. But, yay! Since you say so, Haru, I’ll just give it a try. Ah yeah. Can I ask you for something this time?”
“If it’s something I can do…”
“Do you mind saying ‘do your best’? I’m actually a simple person. If I’m cheered on, I might be able to work a little harder.”
“That’s it? Hasn’t everyone else said that to you many times?”
“It’s completely different this time. Say it to me. Please!”
“Got it. Do your best.”
Akane closed her eyes, seemingly trying to focus as she listened.
“I will…”
“Do your best.”
“I will.”
“Do your best, Akane.”
“Yep! I’ll do my best!”
Akane slowly opened her eyes. Being the genuinely popular person, cheerful, kind, a little clumsy, and very honest that she was, at that moment she was as radiant as the summer sun.
Looking at her, I couldn’t help but narrow my eyes.
Then, Akane, who arrived by my left, turned around me and returned to where she came from.
The moment her silhouette grew smaller, for some reason, she turned towards me again. She walked out of the shade, and stood in the intense light. The water droplets all over her reflected the sunlight, and she looked really dazzling.
“Yep, I’ll do my best for sure,” she said and raised a fist in my direction. “So do your best too, Haru.”
“Ah, I see,” I muttered.
Guess I really have to.
I felt a little itch within my heart, yet it felt so comfortable.
“What’s the matter?” she asked
“Nothing. Just that I guess I really have to do my best.”
Hearing my reply, Akane’s cheeks turned a little red and she said with glee, “I know, right?”
That conversation with Akane finally allowed me to regain some composure. But once I returned to the field, that calm vanished in an instant.
Yuki was waiting under a tree by the track field.
She was talking to someone.
That boy had his hair slightly long and looked pretty cool. He’s wearing the soccer team jersey. If I remembered correctly, the name was Sawachika. I had heard about him three months ago when my classmate, Satake, proudly boasted that a really fast winger joined them.
I could see a few other guys from the soccer team spying on him and Yuki from some distance away. They scattered in a panic as soon as they noticed I was back.
That gave me a rough idea of what was going on. It seemed that he was hitting on Yuki. Well, it wasn’t really that odd with her just standing there and looking beautiful.
But if that really was the case, what should I do? What was the right thing to do?
Then, it hit me.
What was I trying to accomplish?
Even I found it stupid to catch myself thinking about questions.
The heat must have really gotten to me. That behaviour was really unlike me but, well, it wasn’t a bad thing either. Not a bad thing at all.
I approached the two of them while they were still talking. As soon as Yuki noticed me, she scuttled to my side.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“Just a little trouble.”
While we were talking, Sawachika approached. Yuki saw him, and ducked behind me. I in turn took a step forward.
The moment I did so, Sawachika seemed to hesitate and swallowed whatever he was about to say. Honestly, that was all he could do.
For us sports club members, seniors are revered like Gods. Sawachika did in fact approach Yuki when I was not around. He probably waited for this opportunity.
With a kind smile on my face, I said to Sawachika.
“I think you’re called Sawachika, right? I guess club activities aren’t easy after the third years retired? Satake still does pop by from time to time though, no?”
I didn’t really care what I was talking about. I just wanted to let him know of my relationship with their ex-team captain, Satake.
Sawachika understood what I was getting at and, while obviously not really happy, he bowed towards me politely, and returned to his buddies at the club.
That day, after practice.
That day after practice Yuki, who until yesterday would disappear while I was changing in the club changing room, was standing in front of the entrance looking up at the sky. The low-lying sun was about to set and the clouds refracted the orange light turning the skies a blazing red. Yuki’s long shadow and her indistinct, when compared to its afternoon sharpness, fleeting silhouette gave the impression that she would disappear the moment I looked away from her.
“Hm, what’s the matter?”
I said to Yuki, who turned towards me. Her clear hair was sparkling, and her smile was really pretty. It was the first time in my life that I found someone’s smile so pretty.
“Hmm. What’s the matter?” I asked.
That made her turn towards me. Her clear hair was sparkling, her smile really pretty. It was the first time in my life that I found someone’s smile so pretty.
“I want to thank you for getting me out of trouble. Let’s go to the convenience store. I’ll treat you to ice-cream or something.”
“No need for that. I didn’t do much anyway.”
“Hey. I’m happy, so I want to thank you. Can’t I?”
“Well… Not that you can’t…”
“Let’s go then.”
“Let’s go then.”
Before I could reply, Yuki turned towards the school gate. I pursued her, and walked alongside her.
Before I could argue any further, Yuki turned and started heading towards the school gate. I gave chase and ended up walking alongside her.
Two shadows swayed side by side, but not once did they meet. There was a gap the size of a person between us. I just felt like I was whispering a little as I talked. Why?
Two shadows swayed side by side, but not once did they meet. There was a gap the size of a person between us. When I started to talk, I just felt like whispering a little for some reason. Wasn’t really sure why.
“Really, Yuki, you’re pretty popular.”
“That’s not true.”
“But you were approached by Sawachika today.”
“Ah, so that was Sawachika-kun?”
“You never asked for his name?”
“…I forgot. I figured he came to look for me because of you, Yoshi-kun.”
“Nope. Didn’t he wait to approach you until I wasn’t around?”
“Doesn’t seem like it. When I was really alone, nobody actually talked to me. I know I was being watched then but well… That was all to it. Yep, definitely. I guess I wasn’t human back then.”
I could hear her mutter “Alone” at the end there. Her voice sounded a little forlorn.
That loneliness of hers was infectious.
“So does that mean you turn into a monster when I’m not around?”
I made a joke. I didn’t care if she was angry, shocked, or took me as a fool.
I just wanted her to look anything other than sad. Yes, anything else’s fine, anything but that.
I wanted her to forget her sadness and loneliness. At this point, she’s not alone, since I was walking next to her.
For a moment, Yuki was flabbergasted. “Ahahaha.” And then she burst out laughing.
Her anguish was forgotten, just as I had hoped.
“Yeah. I become a monster that spits fire!”
She deliberately opened her mouth wide, raised her eyebrows, and made a “Gyaaa!!!!” sound with all her might. Like a monster fully intent to destroy a town.
“You’re going to wreck the town?”
“Of course.”
“You’re going to fight the hero?”
“Of course!”
“So, you’ll only become human again when I’m around?”
“Yes…”
“Why?”
Yuki didn’t answer. I continued to ask anyway.
“Why do you only become human again when you’re with me?”
Yuki answered with the same joking tone she used up till now.
“Because you’re a weirdo, Yoshi-kun.”
“Huh?”
“Because you’re the only one who’ll talk to a weirdo like me.”
“I see.” So I went with the flow, nodding, but thinking back about it, I had no memories of being the one who talked to her. As far as I knew, it was Yuki who had spoken to me first.
“Wait, aren’t you the one who first spoke to me, Yuki?”
“Is that so?”
“Think about it. I was practicing back then. You’re the one who told me ‘You’re really working hard’.”
“Ah, we’re at the convenience store. Come on, let’s go in.”
Before I could finish, Yuki grabbed my arm, and ran forward. Our shadows merged together. For some reason Yuki’s hand was a little cold. So cold, in fact, that I was worried it would melt in my hotter than usual grip.
We bought the ice-cream and sat down in the shade at the parking lot. I hurriedly removed the packaging from mine and bit into the sugar coating. My teeth broke through, and the sweet filling flowed out. It was delicious. I munched at the thing and I was rewarded by a comforting sound accompanying the nice, chewy feeling.
“Is this really enough? There are some more expensive ones .”
“I like this one.”
“Well, I guess it’s delicious after all.”
It was evening and many people passed by the convenience store. A big sister taking a dog on a stroll. Some high school students wearing headphones. The uncle in a suit hurrying along, probably on the way back to his company. Two yelling youths on bicycles pedalling their ways home.
“Seriously, Yoshi-kun,” said Yuki as she stood beside me, licking the melted ice-cream on her hand.
She noticed me turn to her and commented that she really couldn’t eat it that fast.
I knew this was not what she wanted to talk about, so I waited patiently for her to finish. Not long after, she was nibbling on the wooden stick, just as I had done.
“So, have you ever competed against someone?” she asked.
“Eh?”
“Have you ever wanted to beat someone?”
She sounded like she knew the answer.
“You know?”
“Well, I can feel it. I’ve been watching you all the time.”
“All the time?”
“All the time.”
“Ahahaha.” I started laughing to pass the vague statement off. “What are you saying?” but Yuki wasn’t laughing. She was staring intently at me.
I started laughing to defuse that vague statement.
“What are you saying?” I asked.
But Yuki wasn’t laughing. She was just staring at me intently.
That awkward laugh of mine withered in the summer air, slowly fading away, until it finally disappeared altogether. I stared at the tattered tips of my shoes. Suddenly, to my shock, their tips warped softly. Everything in my vision, the world I saw, all became vague and fuzzy.
For a moment, for some reason, I started talking about the issue I had intended to bury in the depths of my heart for all time.
It was something I had brooded over countless times. Something I thought I had come to terms with.
But now, words came out from my throat, my mouth. Disjointed sequences of unrelated terms.
About a friend I had called Takeshita.
About how he was really fast.
That he had a senior he admired.
How that romance ended up going nowhere.
And how he just gave up on track after that.
My voice was cracking, my body was shaking, my vision wavered. I was just giving voice to my raw emotions. And those hot, sharp emotions that took the form of words were continuously stabbing at the softest parts of my heart. The parking lot got darker little by little all the while.
How much time passed until I said what I wanted to say? Two minutes? Three minutes?
“So that was why you started running,” she muttered.
“What do you mean?”
“You’re always running hard, Yoshi-kun, but never really fully prepared. That might be because you admire Takeshita-kun too much, making you stay just a step behind him. Yes, I see now. I finally know what I can do.”
I rubbed my face with my palms, and lifted my head. The world was assumed the colours of night before I knew it, and there were many little blinking lights behind Yuki as she stood up. She was so pretty, be it day, evening, or night.
“Hey, just to be sure. Yoshi-kun, do you really want to surpass Takeshita-kun’s record?”
“I started running because of that guy.”
“You’re not being honest. If you have something you want, say it. If you want to win, say that you want to win.”
“…”
“Come on. Say it.”
“I want to win. I want to beat Takeshita.”
“Right. Good. I’ll get you to beat him.”
Yuki took the ice-cream stick from my hand, and replaced it with hers. The words ‘You win’ were written large on it. Who knew, it was possible to win this lucky draw after all. Until today, the first time I saw it, I thought it was an urban legend for sure.
“You’re really lucky, Yoshi-kun. It’s like you have a Goddess of luck following you.”
She smiled bashfully as she said that. Then, she immediately looked away from me, but I could see her ears redden slightly from behind.
The next day, the sudden downpour meant that I could not go to school.
The day after was the same, and the track was terrible. I could not run. It was only three days after I had eaten that ice cream that I reunited with Yuki on an afternoon.
I finished my warmups and was just jogging around when Yuki showed up like usual. I saw her, and froze. She in turn raised her hand, said “Hi”, and acted like nothing had happened.
“Seems like today’s the hottest day of the summer,” she said.
“No, that’s one thing altogether. What’s with your getup though?”
I pointed at Yuki’s clothing. For some reason, she was wearing our school’s gym clothes. The white clothes were translucent, and I could see the outline and the colour of her underwear. I was sure that I shouldn’t be looking, but I just couldn’t move my eyes away from those lines.
“I bought it.”
“So… Why again?”
“I might end up dirtying my clothes today.”
“That’s not what I want to know. I’m asking why have you bought our school’s gym clothes?”
“If I wear this, nobody’s going to suspect my identity if I’m seen. Anyway, are you ready?”
I felt that, well, with things coming to this point, and Yuki looking a little happy, I didn’t bother to retort. I nodded. Thanks to the sudden rain from before, I had ample rest, and I was feeling fine. This was the feeling I had when I broke my record at the Prefectures.
“But can I really beat, Takeshita?”
“Yep. All will be fine. Just run full speed as you do, Yoshi-kun, and believe in me. Never take your eyes off me. Simple, right?”
I bumped my fist against hers. For some reason she reached out with them full of confidence. After that, Yuki went to the finish line, while I went to the starting blocks.
Like usual, I shut of from my surroundings and I chanting the best starting routine within my mind as I extended my leg tendons. I placed my hand on my wildly beating heart. I took a slow breath full of the summer air into my lungs.
I opened my eyes.
The blue sky and the daylight entered my eyes, and so did the sight of Yuki standing by the finishing line.
Before I knew it, my heart calmed down.
I positioned myself on the starting line. I got ready to run. Yuki raised her hand. I looked forward.
“Ready——”
The world turned silent.
“Don!”
That was the only sound I could hear.
I started running and that start was perfect. I maintained a forward posture as I pushed forth, accelerating while I slowly straightened my upper body. The wind blew by, and the scenery changed. I continued to dash forward at a speed I had never felt before.
10m passed. 20m passed. Hah. Hah. My front foot latched onto the ground as I leaped forth.
30m passed. 40m passed. I might really be able to make it.
And the moment I ran past 50, like usual, I looked towards the shadow running before me.
The shadow I could never surpass.
I had always seen Takeshita in it. This time, though, something was different.
“Yoooooossssssshhhhhhiiiiiikkkkkkkkuuuuunnnn. Lift your hhhheeeeaaaaadddddd!”
Yuki shouted at me.
She was probably not used to yelling so loud. Her voice seemed to be breaking.
I lifted my head, just as she called out to me. I saw the finishing line. Her face was red as she shouted at me.
“Look forrrrwwwwwwaaaaarrrrddd!”
Seriously, erm, what are you doing, Yuki? I thought.
I ended up grinning anyway.
“I’m here!”
She waved her arms, shouting.
“Fly over here!!!”
Finally, she exclaimed, “Just trust me! Just look at me!”
So I put my faith in Yuki.
I simply looked at her.
Yeah. It was just that simple. Because…
For every step I took, she was one step closer to me. I wanted to be faster… I wanted to get to Yuki faster. Even if it was just a second faster, a moment, I wanted to be faster.
She was at the center of the world.
There was nothing else.
One step, two steps, three steps. I definitely couldn’t slow down. More importantly, I had to be faster.
On the last step, I stepped hard against the ground and, as she had said, I leapt into her open arms. It was summer, but I smelled the sweet fragrance of spring. The fragrance of cherry blossoms.
At that moment, I heard a ‘beep’, and at the same time, the world spun. I was puzzled. All that was left was the dumbfounding sound echoing in my mind.
And before I knew it, I was lying on the ground, face up. Yuki’s hands were on my neck and she herself was lying down on my body. It was likely that the moment I was about to crash into her, she pined me down under herself.
“It hurts…”
The impact should have been focused mostly on my back, but I was aching all over. I coughed and struggled for breath. The pain was unbearable but Yuki moved away her hands from my neck not worried about me at all. All she cared about was in the palm of her hands. Just when I thought she would embrace me firmly, she exclaimed instead.
“What are you doing? Falling hurts.”
But Yuki didn’t care about what I said at all. Her face was beaming as she brought her palm close to my face.
“Here, have a look.”
I didn’t know what she was saying. The important thing was that my back was hurting, and that my stomach was feeling Yuki’s ass. My reaction must have appeared a little strange to her since she pouted, curling her lips.
“Can’t you be a little happier?”
“Eh… Erm… Happier about what?”
“The time. Look. Open your eyes wide.”
I spent about 10 seconds or so trying to comprehend what she was saying. It took another 5 seconds before I accepted the reality in front of my eyes. My disbelief was focused upon the time shown on the stopwatch in Yuki’s hand.
It was a new 100m record.
I beat Takeshita’s record.
“Why?”
Suddenly, I cried. Seared deep within my eyes was Yuki’s smile. And the stopwatch. Suddenly, I couldn’t see anymore.
“Well, Yoshi-kun, I think you’ve long ago surpassed Takeshita-kun, but you admired him so much that you somehow never ended up running all out. Whenever you reached the last 50 meters, you would look down. Always. That caused you to slow down a little. You could have just looked ahead, but you never did. No, you couldn’t do that, right? The Takeshita-kun running ahead of you all the time was no longer there, and you were scared of that. You really admired Takeshita-kun.”
I covered my eyes with my hands, gritting my teeth. If I didn’t, lots of various fluids would flow out. More importantly, I didn’t want Yuki to see this expression of mine.
“He was a really amazing guy. If that guy were still running track, my speed would be nothing when compared to him. That was what I wanted to see. Yeah. I just wanted to see the Takeshita that was faster that his past self.”
But such a person didn’t exist.
I knew that. I knew how much, how hard I worked. How much I prayed for that result. And now Yuki helped me reach that place, but there was nothing I had hoped for here. Even so…
Yuki moved my arm aside, and used her thin, long thumb to wipe away the tears in my eyes. Right, then left. And every tear that was shed afterwards. She wiped them all for me.
My vision got clearer. I finally understood what was at the place I worked so hard to arrive at.
“Congratulations. You worked hard, Yoshi-kun.”
There was Yuki.
Her words.
I guess all my hard work had been repaid in full.
On our way back, we dropped by the convenience store again.
This time, I offered to treat her to ice-cream as thanks, and she went for the 300-yen ice-cream cup. Well, it didn’t really matter. After some hesitation, I too chose the same brand. She went for strawberry flavour, while I chose rum and raisin. I guess it was fine splurge a little since we were celebrating.
We sat alongside each other, at the same place, and found a cicada carcass there.
Summer was about to end.
Yuki stared at the soulless husk.
“Cicadas spent about 6 years waiting in the dirt,” she muttered.
“The Aburazemi are the same, it seems. I think I read somewhere that like the Aburazemi, there are cicadas that wait 17 years in the ground.”
“Yes. And within a week above ground, they’ll die. What’s the meaning of that?”
“…At least, there’s the mission of continuing to the next generation.”
“That might be the case for the females, but the males are different. A male cicada can mate with many, and so there are males unable to leave children behind. So, do you think that male has a purpose to live?”
Yuki’s words seemed poignant, so I had some thought into it, and answered,
“The meaning of life differs according to each individual, and I think this isn’t something I can agree with or deny easily. But they definitely tried their hardest to live.”
“Even if they did, there’s no point to it at all.”
“I don’t think so. That’s what you taught me, Yuki. If I work hard and reach a certain destination, even if there’s nothing I originally wanted there, there’ll be other things to find at the end. I certainly have. In fact, it seems like some cicadas can survive for a month.”
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not. It’s hard to raise them, and that’s why most don’t last more than a week. That’s why many people are under that misapprehension. In fact, wild cicadas can live for about a month. That’s what the TV says, and that’s why they’ll definitely find something.”
The last bit was just me trying to fit in a consolation.
It was a cheap lie I invented just to get Yuki to smile.
To be honest, I really didn’t care about what happened to the cicada. Evne so, if Yuki wished for it, I would pray, hoping that its life would be meaningful.
Yuki finally picked up the spoon, and brought the somewhat melted ice-cream into her mouth. “Nice, nice,” she said, and I kept watching her as I opened the lid.
“Hm? While we’re on that subject, you said found something, Yoshi-kun?”
“It’s a secret.”
Under no circumstances I should say the truth here. Thus I answered in that manner instead.
“But I feel this summer day is one I’ll definitely never forget when I grow up.”
Even when today becomes the past, even when I grow older, even as time passes and memories fade.
I would never forget this summer heat.
The tears and sweat that were shed.
The sweetness of this ice cream.
The fragrance of the cherry blossoms.
And the important thing I obtained.
Yuki just muttered something staring at the plastic spoon.
It was dark, and I couldn’t see her expression.
But I could kind of make out that she seemed to be pouting. And vague hints of a word.
“…Liar.”
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