Harem God: Leveling Up Yanderes in the Apocalypse

After the haremites assembled in the park, Leon stood up. He was already on the wooden speaker's platform.

"Ladies! Tonight, I'll bring you entertainment and the ability to receive god gifts!" He announced with hands held high.

Excited whispers rippled through the crowd. It was an epic slumber party, so everyone had high expectations.

"But first!" Leon said while panning the five hundred haremites, "How was the bath?"

The haremites met his words with thunderous applause and cheers.

"Thought so. Thank Layla for organizing it." He said with a smile while looking at her, "She brought all the major players together and did a spectacular job!"

Layla's eyes trembled in confusion as hundreds of haremites turned to the bald lesbian and showered her with lavish praise.

She looked over at Caitlyn, Lindy, Tricksie, and Reina, who stood near the stage, clapping without malice in their eyes. It made the woman feel worse! The idea they'd kill her, and it wouldn't be personal, was far more terrifying!

However, Leon sang her praises which meant guaranteed survival—for now.

"Thank you, everyone. Now, I'll present you with tonight's entertainment!" Leon announced with a charming smile.

He cringed internally, desperately trying to twist the event's details into something appealing. It was only displayed to him, so he had that option.

—

Special Event: Leon's Sexy Pillow Fight Night

—

"We shall have a… pillow fight tournament!" Leon announced.

The haremites looked at him with strange expressions. While he was known for his playboy stunts, they knew him now and figured he'd drop the act.

"I'm glad you don't think I'm a playboy." Leon chuckled, "But I'm a Harem God candidate. Can't you let me save face?"

A wave of bewildered giggles and laughs ensued. Everyone forgot the man was a Harem God candidate!

"Yay! Pillow fight? I have an opportunity to look sexy to my harem leader!" Quinn called out in a sarcastically girly voice.

Everyone continued laughing, still trying to recover from the last wave.

"Oh, la, la! Our leader is sooooooo handsome. I can't wait to please him!" Kern followed with equally girly sarcasm.

"Oh my! everything we do around this sexy man is enthralling, so I can't wait!" Foxy yelled in her normal voice.

The haremites fell silent momentarily and turned to Foxy with stunned faces. She shrugged, confirming she wasn't joking, and everyone giggled in amazement.

"Can I crush shit?" Manka asked dryly, "Unless I'm eating, I only do shit if I can crush shit."

Everyone turned to her. It just occurred to her that she was the only haremite who wasn't in the bathhouse. While it could accommodate her, she didn't show up because people kept looking at her scales before she slithered in.

"You can crush the competition." Leon chuckled.

"Which brings me to the three events that will happen, each tailored to personality types!

Duly note that these are special events, so you don't have to win events to get gifted prizes from the gods. So everyone has a chance to win wealth and glory just for being entertaining!"

Everyone turned to him with newfound excitement, cheering lightly and awaiting his words.

—

Event Three: Knock Out

Description: A poorly titled game that's incredibly difficult to describe with a better name.

…

Note: Good luck finding a better title, you Worry Warrior.

—

"First up is a game called Pillow Push. To win, you'll use pillows to push other haremites out of the ring. You can use magic to dodge but not for offense.

Each person's strength is automatically equalized in all games. This game focuses exclusively on wit and experience. Therefore, everyone has a chance to win!" Leon announced.

The haremites burst into applause, especially those without combat experience.

"What is this low-grade socialism?" Manka gruffed, "What's the point of spendin' our lives building strength if we can't use it?"

Leon gave her a mocking smile. "Dying with misperceptions of your power if you fight against Caitlyn."

Everyone quieted down, but when they saw Manka's wry smile, they burst into laughter again.

"Manka, are you saying that you can't win in [battle] against non-combatant classes?" Leon mused, "That brute strength is the only thing that gives you power?"

"Is that supposed to be a joke?" The buff snake woman scoffed, "Of course not. Unless you're deaf, you know that I like crushin' shit. You can't crush shit if you don't have strength!"

"Hoh? I didn't know you needed 16,000 pound grip strength to crush someone else's pillow." He replied mockingly.

The haremites burst into laughter again.

"Look, everyone! These events are voluntary. If you're not confident in your battle skills without magic, then you should work on them." Leon announced, "Moving on!"

"I'll crush anyone who mocks me—if I can." Manka chuckled under her breath, "But damn that man's strong. I like it."

"Second, we have a game that's designed for non-combatants. Duly note that the gods choose these games…." Leon said awkwardly.

Giggles sprang forth like a tapped oil well. Everyone knew that whatever happened would be low-grade, crude, and sketchy.

—

Event One: Sexy Lingerie Pillow Fight

Description: Be the sexiest or cutest woman in the pillow fight. Participants aren't judged on their aesthetics but their personalities and behaviors.

Note: Every participant will receive epic-grade lingerie of their choosing, you Nervous Nancy.

—

"It's called Personality-Centric Free Epic-Grade Intimate Wear Opportunity." He said with a thin smile, nervously awaiting feedback.

"Just say underwear pillow fight, you prude." Kazz laughed in amazement, "Putting the sales pitch in the title makes it sound like there are catches."

The area erupted into a merciless jest fest.

"I agree. Now I feel like there are requirements to join."

"Right? Does that mean it's a nude pillow fight where we win panties?"

"Who cares? It sounds kinda… exciting."

"Speak for yourself, Foxy!"

Leon closed his eyes and grimaced openly.

"It's called the Sexy Lingerie Pillow Fight. Every participant gets epic-grade underwear just for participating. They'll increase strength, charm, or… whatever." He said with a wry smile.

"Participants are graded on the sexiness and cuteness of their personalities. If Zora and Zena turn into bashful kittens, they'll win. Once again, there's prizes."

Everyone turned to the women in interest.

"Can we fake it?" Zena asked coldly.

"Do we have to blush?" Zora asked enthusiastically.

"You don't have to blush, and if we couldn't fake it, I wouldn't be standing here as a candidate." Leon chuckled.

"I'm in." Zena announced dryly.

"I'll participate." Zora seconded in a monotone voice.

The haremites cheered when they got the confirmation. They were having fun and looking forward to it.

"Okay, if they're joining, I'm sure everyone who wants free underwear will too." Leon announced.

After the cheering finished, he continued. "Moving on to the first event of tonight…."

Everyone calmed down, awaiting his words with anticipation.

—

Event One: Pillow Fight

Description: …

Note: We look forward to how you'll present this ;)

—

Leon gave everyone a malicious grin. "We're having a real pillow fight."

…

When the haremites showed up at Likstead Park, the park they lived at until moving to Maple street park, their eyes widened in shock.

There was a massive cylindrical construct that covered the park and all of the side streets as well. The walls were one hundred feet tall and made out of limestone.

In a single word: It was a colosseum.

During Leon's short speech, he sent word to have it installed, and the gods dropped the pre-built structure from the heavens. Or they materialized it with spatial magic.

The way they did it didn't change how ridiculous it was. It was nearly as absurd as the gods holding the God Trial during an apocalypse, which said something.

"Welcome to our new event stadium!" Leon announced with a grin, "They felt Harem City needed a permanent sports stadium. One fit for a harem god, of course. You'll see that in a moment."

Bewildered giggles rippled through the crowd in disbelief. The gods were decadent animals beyond comparison.

"I can't believe they'd do this…." Quinn said in bewilderment.

"Why not?" Leon laughed, "This is just one more excuse to bet. Their depravity knows no bounds, but it's in our favor, yes?"

The women shook their heads in disbelief. However, everyone was smiling at the god's unabashed behavior.

"Let's go inside and get this party started, shall we?" Leon asked with a slight smile.

Everyone cheered in assent, and five hundred people walked through the colosseum gates, making their way down a hall to the event floor.

When they walked into the main area, everyone burst into laughter.

The [arena floor] was a massive bed lined with lavish red silk sheets. There were thousands of pillows stacked in storage rooms along the sides.

Twenty rows of granite slabs made up the seating, making it a true gladiator-style ring that could house a thousand people.

It was the most wildly decadent construct they had ever seen.

"I guess I didn't know what it meant to be a Harem God" Leon laughed in disbelief.

"Well, at least we have an excuse to have kinky sex." Lindy grinned with a hint-hint expression.

"Yay! Let's gooooooooo!" Tricksie yelled excitedly, "It's still a bit too small, but we'll make it work!"

"I like it. It seems like the perfect size…." Reina began, but her eyes widened in shock mid-sentence, and she turned to Leon with a mortified expression, waving hands frantically.

"No! I mean, for the others, I wouldn't imply you want to make babies with me unless you wanted to—" She cried before stopping with even more panic.

"No, that's worse! Causal sex, sorry, I mean… Gahhhh! This is so embarrassing!"

Leon scoff-laughed in amusement. "If you want."

Reina's eye sparkled for a moment, but she slapped her cheeks cutely. "If you want, I mean, yes."

She hung her head in shame, dejected by her mortifying awkwardness.

He knew she was being serious, so the ridiculously extra acting indicated her genuine enthusiasm.

As long as a woman was enthusiastic, he had no problems with sex. So he smiled genuinely and confirmed his willingness. "Then so it shall be."

After their strange moment, he led everyone to the stands.

"Okay, line up! The administration team will record the names of the participants for each event.

They're all voluntary, and everyone can participate in all three events." Leon announced.

Cynthia gave him a bitter smile but nodded and took out some paper.

The twenty administration team members lined up alongside Cynthia and Quinn to record names. Once they were ready, Leon gave an announcement.

"Alright, everyone! I'm moving to the skybox. My role is to give the thumbs up and down to mediate improper magic use, so I'll see you in the ring!

We'll serve you god-provided sushi in the stands. So enjoy it!

Now, let's get moving. Heavenly beds await us once we're done!"

The haremites cheered and waved as he walked away.

"Alright. If you're participating, line up! Otherwise, walk into the main hallway and file into the stands!" Cynthia yelled.

"If you have questions—just don't. You have three seconds to give the words one, two, three, all three, one and two, one and three, or two and three.

If you say anything but those things, you're disqualified. So line up and say three words or less, or go to the stands. Go!"

"Wheeeeeeew!" Kazz whistled in amusement. She didn't say a word on purpose, triggering a murderous glare from Cynthia. Her amethyst eyes said she wasn't joking.

Kazz put her hands up. "One and Three."

"Good, now fuck off." The elf demanded coldly.

Everyone got into one of the twenty-two lines to sign up. Three hundred opted out completely, so the stands filled up quickly.

Leon chuckled in his skybox, surrounded by his harem members, including Reina. They would compete, but he chose the matchups, so signing them up was irrelevant.

Someone knocked on the door.

"Come in!" He yelled.

The door opened, and a short woman in her late twenties walked in. She had a blonde pixie cut and light brown eyes. Her name was Olivia, and she was a communications team member.

"Hello, Mr. Traxler. Here's the updated information." Olivia said while passing him the sheet.

"Thank you." Leon said with a slight smile.

Then he looked down at the paper as she walked away to get the next round of information.

"Okay… who should we have for the first battle?" He mused. He stared at the names and then grinned.

His partners looked at him in anticipation.

Leon turned to them with an evil grin. "Let's start with a catfight."

—

[A/N: Get prepared to meet a new character in a few chapters. ;)]

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