Guide on How to Fail at Online Dating

Chapter 7 - Ai, Gege is still so handsome even when you’re not talking QvQ

When the latter four arrived at the scene, what they saw was the sight of Xiao Tianjing rushing over to Yearning For.

Her “Gege” almost made Lu Hang’s heart go numb when he heard it. “Are you sure you don’t know her?”

In the game, there were two choices after joining a party. One was for the character to follow the leader, and there was no need for any operation on their part; the other was to operate by themselves, but only move within a limited scope.

Xiang Huaizhi pressed down on a hotkey to relieve his team members of having to follow him, moved backwards, and dodged the person who fell from the sky. “Don’t know her.”

Jing Huan never thought that Xiang Huaizhi would catch him in the first place, so in the few seconds before landing, he used his jump skill to hop off the cliff next to him and landed in front of Yearning For without losing even a strand of hair.

He roughly glanced at the team following Yearning For. Un, three whole healers.

For the sake of picking up girls, he was even foregoing efficiency in killing monsters. This was indeed the style of slag men.

While Jing Huan mocked him in his heart, he made his character nudge towards Yearning For and hide behind his character, then said in an extremely aggrieved tone, “God of War Gege…there are people who wanna kill me.”

Those from Idle Pavilion just so happened to hear this and quickly exchanged a few words in their party.

“Yearning For? Why is he in a wild map?”

“Didn’t you see the three girls in his party? He’s probably picking up girls, tsk, Xianxian’s really pitiful.” The warlock paused. “But…that Xiao Tianjing really has a nice voice.”

“Duh, why else do you think that bigshot in the guild fell flat on his face?! But what relationship does she have with Yearning For?”

“I dunno. So what do we do now? If Yearning For lends her a hand, we probably won’t be able to beat him, right…”

Because of the punishment measure put in place for players who are killed in a compulsory PK they initiated, the team was hesitant and stood in place for a long while without making a move.

“… Don’t worry, I’ll ask him.” The warlock said, then switched to the current channel.

“God…Yearning For.” He swallowed the words God Xiang back into his stomach. “Do you know her? She just destroyed Xianxian’s equipment.”

Xiang Huaizhi frowned.

[Current] Yearning For: Who’s Xianxian.

Everyone: “…”

Everyone aside from Lu Hang all stood still in an instant, and the prolonged silence seemed to be saying two words — “slag guy”.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: It was Immortal Mengmeng who tried to hunt me down first. Is there anything wrong with killing her in self-defense? [doubtful]

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: God of War Gege QAQ, they just want the treasure map you gave me, they’re so mean.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: I won’t let them succeed!

The people present fell silent again.

Lu Hang really couldn’t help laughing, and his whole body convulsed from laughing too hard. “You’ve even given her a love token, yet you still say you don’t know her?!”

Xiang Huaizhi corrected with a long face, “It wasn’t given.”

It was snatched; it was snatched from right under his nose with a skill that dealt 79 damage.

Someone from Idle Pavilion turned on their mic again. “Yearning For, does that mean you intend to involve yourself in this?”

[Current] Yearning For: No.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: See?! What my Gege meant was that he wants all of you to get lost right now! He’ll consider not killing you all in that case! [anger]

[Current] Yearning For: ?

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: Gege has sent out a question mark. If you guys still won’t run, you’ll have to lose your equipment too! [hammers table]

The warlock was the leader of the pursuit team this time. He was already shocked by Immortal Mengmeng losing her equipment, so he was now extremely fearful and nervous. At this moment, he felt a little unsure as well.

“&#k2026; Okay, you guys just wait.”

After throwing this sentence out, he chanted his sect skill on the spot for half a second and quickly left the scene with his team.

Xiang Huaizhi, who was just about to type, “…”

How dare they pursue people when they were so timid?

In the game, the little fairy fox jumped around him and even used an in game character action to blow a kiss at him.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: Thank you Gege. I was almost scared to death [crying]

Xiang Huaizhi had wanted to say something, but he stopped halfway through tapping on his keyboard.

Forget it. What’s the use of entangling himself with this swindler?

On the contrary, Lu Hang’s interest was piqued.

[Current] Long Road Ahead: Scared? It’s not like they could catch up to you with how well you played.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: I only played surprisingly well just now out of fear QAQ luckily God of War Gege was around.

[Current] Long Road Ahead: Old Xiang really gave you that treasure map? Isn’t it a binding item?

Xiang Huaizhi frowned. “Why do you have so much nonsense to say? Do you still want to do the instances or not?

“Aiya, I was just asking a couple of questions.” Lu Hang said, “Don’t you think this woman is very interesting?”

“No, I don’t.”

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: Un un, I wanted to dig out the good stuff and give it to God of War Gege, but I was only halfway through digging before those people from Idle Pavilion came QvQ

Lu Hang smacked his thigh. “Good one Old Xiang! This little sister is so committed to you!”

Xiang Huaizhi sneered, “Un, why don’t you date her? The kind of relationship where you get your account cleaned out.”

Xiang Huaizhi didn’t bother with gossip. Normally, he wouldn’t even read megaphones carefully. It was Lu Hang who had told him about the female swindler.

At that time, Lu Hang had even vowed: it’s the same pattern, it must be the same pattern, this account definitely didn’t change hands!

“No but, look at what she said. She said she’ll give you whatever she digs out with the treasure map. Didn’t you do all those quests for so many days just to get a treasure map?” Lu Hang asked, “Even if she is a swindler, we won’t lose out from this!”

Xiang Huaizhi did need treasure maps.

To be precise, what he needed were the precious materials and Enchanting Pearl that could only be dug out with treasure maps.

Unfortunately, he had only found one treasure map after doing all the quests so many times – and it was even snatched away by Xiao Tianjing.

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: Gege, what you lack is the Enchanting Pearl right? I can dig it out! [clenches fist]

[Current] Yearning For: …

[Current] Long Road Ahead: Wow, how did you know?!

[Current] Xiao Tianjing: I’ve been reading the system announcements these days. Gege has been doing reincarnation quests recently, so he probably wants to hatch a spiritual beast ba?

Xiang Huaizhi didn’t speak.

He was indeed doing the quest of hatching a spiritual beast, and the last part of the quest required the Enchanting Pearl.

Enchanting Pearls were tradable items, but they could only be obtained through treasure maps, and the probability of getting one wasn’t high – at least at present, not a single one could be found in their server’s marketplace.

There were still things in this world that couldn’t be done even with money.

Jing Huan formed a party next to them.

“Gege.” Jing Huan pinched his throat and called out, the echo giving himself a headache. “Do you wanna dig for the treasure map together? If you don’t come, I’m afraid I’ll be hunted down again later…”

It wasn’t that Xiang Huaizhi wanted to insist on her returning the treasure map to him.

But if, as she said, she got chased by the guild members of Idle Pavilion, and the treasure map got destroyed, then all those days he spent doing quests day in and day out would be wasted.

He hesitated for a moment, left the party, and applied to join Xiao Tianjing’s party. “I’ll go.”

Digging for treasure maps was so exciting, so Lu Hang also wanted to join in the fun. “Ai sister, take me with you too…”

Before he finished, Xiao Tianjing had already run out of his field of vision with Xiang Huaizhi.

“Fuck, this god damn guy is so hard to coax, would you die if you got in Laozi’s car?” Jing Huan stared at the person in his party as he muttered.

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: God of War Gege, what quest were you doing just now?

[Party] Yearning For: Wild map instance.

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: Oh oh.

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: Wouldn’t it be hard to kill with three healers 0.0

[Party] Yearning For: No.

Ha, of course not. With three girls accompanying you through an instance, you’re probably grinning from ear to ear in front of your computer right? Damn scum.

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: That’s true, I almost forgot! Gege is a super strong DPS! [offers heart]

In order to watch them dig for their treasure map, Lu Hang reluctantly abandoned his three reserve wives in the party and climbed out of bed to sit beside Xiang Huaizhi.

“Old Xiang, tell me, when on earth did you and Xiao Tianjing get acquainted with each other? What did you do to make her so dedicated to you?”

Xiang Huaizhi, “I really don’t know her, would I get any money for lying to you?”

Lu Hang looked at him doubtfully.

Xianghaizhi: “… We met once in a wild map. She robbed me of my Chivalrous Thief kill.”

Lu Hang was shocked. “There’s someone in this world who can snatch your kill?”

“I was on the phone and didn’t notice.” Xiang Huaizhi hesitated a little. “Also, I thought she was a guy.”

Lu Hang, “?”

Xiang Huaizhi was looking at the Fairy Fox who was praising her idol like a brainless fan in the party channel. “No woman would talk like this nowadays.”

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: God of War Gege, your customised face looks so nice. How skilful and how beautiful must your hands be to make this sort of avatarr~! [starry eyes]

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: We’re about to arrive at the coordinates of the treasure map. I’m so nervous!

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: [Is anybody there]

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: Ai, Gege is still so handsome even when you’re not talking QvQ

Lu Hang let out a pfft. “I think… she’s pretty cute?

Xiang Huaizhi couldn’t be bothered with him.

Suddenly, a friend message lit up, and Xiang Huaizhi casually opened it.

[Friend] Immortal Mengmeng: You’re actually in the same party as that female swindler?

[Friend] Immortal Mengmeng: Ha-ha, so hungry you don’t bother choosing what you eat anymore?

[Friend] Immortal Mengmeng: She just destroyed my equipment, do you know that.

Xiang Huaizhi cast a glance and immediately closed the dialog box.

Lu Hang, “Ai, at least reply to her with something.”

“I won’t, too troublesome.”

Lu Hang was puzzled. “Does she even know that the one playing your account for the past few months wasn’t you at all?”

“She knows.”

He had already told Immortal Mengmeng whatever he should have.

However, Immortal Mengmeng just didn’t believe it. She insisted that he was a cicada shedding its carapace to shirk all responsibility, and even embellished a bunch of details to mess up the story.

Lu Hang wanted to continue talking, but his mobile phone suddenly rang. He picked up and replied twice, then walked out of the dormitory.

“God of War Gege.” A girl’s voice travelled into his headphones. Xiao Tianjing asked carefully, “Are you there? We’ve reached the coordinates of the treasure map.”

[Party] Yearning For: Un.

[Party] Xiao Tianjing: Then I’ll start digging ‘kay?

[Party] Yearning For: 1

Since they were in a party, after Jing Huan clicked on the treasure map, the two characters in the party began digging together.

Jing Huan picked up a cup of water next to his hand and drank it, wondering how he should make Yearning For add him as a friend.

Jing Huan had never thought of managing to dig out something good. His unlucky hands handed down from his ancestors could even get him supreme garbage while forging divine artifacts.

Enchanting Pearl? Does he deserve it?

The treasure digging progress bar disappeared, Jing Huan had not yet snapped out of his daze when a row of eye-catching yellow characters popped up on the game interface——

【While digging with your shovel, you destroyed the house of a monster and provoked the King of Yaos that had been living a sequestered life (Mount Luojia 132.72)! Please head to the seal at once! [Required players: Xiao Tianjing, Yearning For. The time limit is 48 hours.]】

【System announcement: Amazing news! Player Xiao Tianjing, Yearning For, have inadvertently destroyed a monster’s house while digging for treasure in Mount Luojia. The homeless King of Yaos is currently picking a fight and causing trouble in Mount Luojia 132.72! 】

【Server-wide system announcement: Illusion Server’s Player Xiao Tianjing, Yearning For, have triggered the hidden quest of Chivalrous Thief’s treasure map: [Wrath of the King of Yaos].】

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Juurensha: Oooh, so scum ML isn’t scum! That’s good to know.

Zryuu: ML is not the slag guy!!

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