Don't be So Proud

Epilogue 2 — Loving in Boston (2)

Boston has a famous river called the Charles River, which originates from Echo Lake in a place in Massachusetts called Hopkinton. It flows through more than twenty beautiful cities to arrive in Boston. On both its north and south shores are prestigious schools built near the waters. Because of the Charles River, Shen Xi’s Boston holiday became much more romantic. He Zhi Zhou had the habit of going for a morning run, regardless of whether he was in China or abroad. As his girlfriend whom he supervised, she would often be dragged out from bed to go running with him along the river’s edge. He would run in front and she would follow behind. After running a little section along the pathway, he would stop to wait for her of his own accord.

Her family called and asked her whether she was unacclimatized to the surroundings and felt unwell. Since getting a boyfriend, though, it was like she had a cast iron stomach. Every day, her boyfriend would take her out for a morning run and exercise, which basically acted as treatment against any and all “unacclimatizations” she might have.

In Boston, fog often forms during the early morning hours. And then, when faint beams of light pierce through the mist, the old streets and beautiful buildings, these things that came from the 50s and 60s of the twentieth century, carry a sense of the mysteriousness of history. On the opposite shore of the Charlies River from them was a magnificent dome built in Roman style—the Massachussetts Institute of Technology, MIT’s main building. The area in Boston where the mouth of the Charles River meets the sea is the most bustling and flourishing part. Every morning, many people come out for a morning run, men and women, young and old. There are old, married couples, and there are young lovers.

Shen Xi had hung around enough by now that there was one couple whose faces she could recognize. The husband of a local, elderly couple had told her that he and his wife came here almost every day to run in the morning. The word “romantic” was already unable to describe this lifetime of love and affection between the couple.

Shen Xi caught up to He Zhi Zhou, who had stopped to wait for her, and taking hold of his hand, declared, “He Zhi Zhou, from now on, let’s be like that old couple and run together every morning, how about that? We’ll run for an entire lifetime!”

He Zhi Zhou was somewhat doubtful, but he still gave his praise to this Shen Xi who was being so good and well-behaved.

The next day, though, the result was that Shen Xi slept in and was unable to get up.

He Zhi Zhou gave a little squeeze to the nose of the girl on the bed. “Didn’t you say yesterday that we’re going to run together for an entire lifetime?”

Opening her eyes just a slit, Shen Xi sat up. Then, she leaned back into He Zhi Zhou’s chest and shamelessly defaulted on her words, saying, “How about this? Let me keep sleeping for a bit, and I’ll run with you in my dreams. Or maybe, I’ll run by imagination; that will work, too.”

Shen Xi’s eyes were closed as she shamelessly retracted her declaration, and her voice was cutely soft, like she was pouting. When she finished uttering her words, she gave another yawn, looking like she could not wake up no matter how she tried. Resigned, He Zhi Zhou closed his arms around Shen Xi, who was still against his chest, and decided to simply sleep in with his girlfriend.

Shen Xi hurriedly hugged He Zhi Zhou tight. Such a good boyfriend. Yay!

In the morning, it was the morning run along the river. In the evenings, the two would go for a stroll together in the dusky light. If they walked far, Shen Xi would very justifiably pronounce that her legs were sore, and He Zhi Zhou would carry her on his back as they made their royal return back to the apartment.

Shen Xi was very much enjoying this sort of lifestyle and too happy to even think about home. However, she needed to bring to a conclusion her student career and studies in China, and then she could come back to Boston. Dou Dou retorted, “You have studies in China?”

In the face of Dou Dou’s doubts, she could only pretend to give a sorrowful sigh and then ignore that little problem that was in the back of her mind: Boston did not have any place that she could do a major in Chinese classical dance. Of course, she could come here and do ballet.

It was not that she had an especially great love for classical dance. It was merely because she had taken it for so many years, and she wanted to end it knowing she had carried through and given it both a proper start and finish.

Shen Xi even went rowing on the Charles River. The boat undulated on the waves, while a group of ducks flapped and frolicked on the water’s surface. It was all so very lively and fun. The boat slowly rowed forward, and their eyes feasted on the scenery along the way.

The breeze rippled up the corner of He Zhi Zhou’s white, button-up shirt, and his face looked even more strikingly clean and handsome. It was scientifically unbelievable that he could look so attractive when even just rowing a boat. Those ducks were crying out with sounds of quack, quack, and Shen Xi, who was quite good at making sounds, imitated their calls. The result was that she truly did draw a team of ducks over to their boat. The ducks of the Charles River were not afraid of humans, and hence, Shen Xi’s face, which originally had carried a smug expression, now was covered in panic. She began to plead to He Zhi Zhou for help. “Big Brother He, they’re really annoying. Quick. Help me shoo them away.”

Someone seemed to have forgotten who had been the one to tease those ducks into coming over.

Boston’s evenings are very beautiful. They carry tinges of pink and dashes of blue and give off a slight purple glow. The evening had descended like a curtain. As she sat in the front passenger seat of the car, her eyes took in the entire city’s lightscape.

It was the end of August. Boston’s autumn was not far.

Shen Xi had been here in this place where He Zhi Zhou was for a period of time already, and her mood was so good that every day, she was very “sunshine” and just brilliantly happy. Living upstairs of them was a young couple, both of whom were Chinese students studying abroad. Shen Xi had first met the girl, Yang Jiayuan, in the supermarket, and it was only later that she learned that the other party lived in the same apartment building. Furthermore, they were one directly above the other, so even more so, it was a tremendously happy surprise.

Yang Jiayuan had a very sweet countenance, and her personality was very lively and fun. What was more, she was a shopping-spree madwoman, knowing when the best, discounted brands could be bought from which place and then, when it was time to leave the country, which process would be the best in order to get the tax refunded. Yang Jiayuan was also a fabulous cook in authentic Jiangnan [region south of the lower reaches of the Yangtze River] cuisine. Although Shen Xi had never tasted her cooking, Yang Jiayuan had added her as a friend on WeChat, and every day, she could see the photos that Yang Jiayuan posted on her Moments page [a Facebook-like profile page in WeChat]. The dishes posted on there were so beautiful it was like they had been made by the hands of a master chef of a five-star hotel. On top of that, every day was something different that she made for her boyfriend to eat. She could basically be the representative for “best girlfriend.”

When Shen Xi began hanging out with Yang Jiayuan, He Zhi Zhou asked her who Yang Jiayuan was. Shen Xi told him, “It’s the girl who lives upstairs of us. She and her boyfriend live in the apartment just above.” She paused for a moment. “You didn’t know that before this?”

“No.”

Shen Xi: “She looks to be pretty nice.”

He Zhi Zhou reminded her, “Making friends isn’t something that you do by looking with your eyes. You need to use your heart. Make sure you’re careful.”

Shen Xi made an “okay” sign with her hands. “I have a good eye and good judgment, you know?”

Ruffling her head, He Zhi Zhou said in an apologetic tone, “I’m sorry. I can’t spare any time after this to keep you company.”

Shen Xi: “No worries.”

He Zhi Zhou: “We’ll have dinner together tonight.”

Shen Xi: “Hee hee… I can’t.”

He Zhi Zhou’s eyes puzzledly swept a glance over her.

Shen Xi explained, “I’ve arranged with Yang Jiayuan already that we’re going to head out together and go buy some stuff. Her boyfriend’s gone back to China for the next while. We’re having dinner together tonight.”

He Zhi Zhou: “Okay.”

He Zhi Zhou did not know who Yang Jiayuan was, but Yang Jiayuan knew who He Zhi Zhou was. Yang Jiayuna remarked, “If it weren’t for the fact that I have a boyfriend, I’d definitely be chasing your boyfriend.”

This was a joking statement, and naturally, Shen Xi treated it as a joke to listen to. She told Yang Jiayuan, “He Zhi Zhou is not an easy one to chase.”

Propping her face in her hands, Yang Jiayuan replied, “I can tell.”

Yang Jiayuan’s boyfriend was called Jiang Yiyu. Recently, some matters had arisen, and he had requested time off to go back to China for one week. When they were eating, Yang Jiayuan narrated the story of her and her boyfriend. Love stories in a foreign country are all somewhat similar. The two had met here in a gathering for people from their province, and both had developed favourable impressions of the other person. During conversation, they discovered that they were actually from the same middle school. When the gathering came to an end, Jiang Yiyu had escorted Yang Jiayuan back to her dormitory. After that, every time there was gathering, they would see one another. Gradually, they began to go travelling together, study together, celebrate holidays together… Last year’s Christmas, they very smoothly and easily became boyfriend and girlfriend.

“What about you guys?” Yang Jiayuan asked Shen Xi. “Isn’t He Zhi Zhou not an easy one to chase? How did you manage to catch him?”

Eating a spoonful of her dessert, Shen Xi replied straightforwardly, “Indeed, he isn’t easy to chase. That’s why he was the one who chased me.”

“All right, then.” Yang Jiayuan gave a nod of her head. “That honestly makes people envious.”

On the way back, Yang Jiayuan got a call from her boyfriend. Shen Xi sniffed out that a quarrel was developing between the two. After hanging up the phone, Yang Jiayuan carried on like there was nothing out of the ordinary, chatting about Boston’s weather. Then, she lifted her chin, pointing with it in the direction in front of them. “Oh, who is that?”

He Zhi Zhou was standing downstairs of the apartment building. The faint lamplight cast an attractive shadow of his slender figure. He had specially come down just to wait for her? When Shen Xi jogged over, He Zhi Zhou took her hand into his with very natural motions. Yang Jiayun gave a wave to He Zhi Zhou, then turned and went upstairs.

It was just the two of them now. Shen Xi tilted her smiling face upwards. “You specially came down to wait for me?”

“No,” He Zhi Zhou said. “Just coincidence that we happened to run into each other.”

Shen Xi poked out her tongue. “Then it really is… such a coincidence.”

That evening, Shen Xi chatted again with He Zhi Zhou about Yang Jiayun and Jiang Yiyu. She had never seen Jiang Yiyu before, but she did have a rather good impression of his name. Yiyu, Yiyu [一遇 “yi yu” means “one encounter”], a pleasant encounter that was hard to come by.

He Zhi Zhou did not provide any response to her words.

“There are lots of couples like that.” After some time, this was what He Zhi Zhou said.

Shen Xi did not really understand. “How are there ‘lots’?”

He Zhi Zhou did not really want to say anything. With Shen Xi in his arms, he closed his eyes, his breath a little hot. Shutting her own eyes, Shen Xi found a comfortable position. However, when she awoke in the middle of the night, the bed was empty.

“He Zhi Zhou!” Shen Xi cried out.

No one answered.

Shen Xi grew panicked. Outside was a shining city of lights, brilliant as a pearl. She hurriedly dialed on her phone. His mobile phone rang three times and then was picked up. When He Zhi Zhou’s familiar voice asked her why she had woken, her tears instantly spilled down, and she felt terribly upset. So, it turned out that in this unfamiliar city, her heart was actually unsettled.

He Zhi Zhou, conversely, let out a chuckle. “An urgent issue came up with the new program that AC just developed over here. Albert gave me a call.”

Shen Xi swiped at her tears. “Why didn’t you just let me know?”

He Zhi Zhou explained, “I left a note beside the bed.”

Shen Xi spun around. Sure enough, a note had been left on the white oak bedside table, and on it were the words He Zhi Zhou had written to her. Shen Xi suddenly felt that she was overly fragile, and awkwardly, she tugged at her hair. “He Zhi Zhou, you go ahead and do your work.”

He Zhi Zhou all of a sudden called her name.

Shen Xi: “Is there… something else?”

He Zhi Zhou: “Hurry back to sleep. I’ll be back tomorrow.”

Shen Xi: “Okay.”

He Zhi Zhou continued giving instructions, his voice gentle like the deep, dark night outside. “Don’t be scared.”

Shen Xi’s head bowed. “Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.”

The next morning, when He Zhi Zhou opened the door with the key, he thought Shen Xi would still be sleeping, and with quiet actions, he bent over and changed his shoes in front of the shoe cabinet. At this moment, Shen Xi unexpectedly rushed out from the kitchen. A blue apron was wrapped around her body, and her hair was tied up softly. There was an indescribable beauty to her.

Millet porridge with a fried egg—the breakfast that Shen Xi had prepared for him.

He Zhi Zhou felt that this was the best pairing, simple and made according to whatever her heart felt like at the momen. It was just like the love between him and Shen Xi—not any amazing, masterpiece pairing, but once they fell for one another, neither could be apart from the other person.

When Shen Xi was alone, most of her time was spent learning English. He Zhi Zhou was very busy, and she was very idle. Yang Jiayuan had become busy as well, because Jiang Yiyu was back. Shen Xi finally saw Jiang Yiyu. He was one of those boys whose looks were particularly popular when you were a student, but he and He Zhi Zhou were two completely different types and styles.

Shen Xi and Yang Jiayuan met up less and less, until one time, when Shen Xi went downstairs to the bakery to buy a bag of bread, she saw Yang Jiayuan and another girl, whose hair was pulled up into a simple ponytail, standing face to face.

Shen Xi went back upstairs. When she went over to the windowsill to water the plants, through the clear window, that girl with the ponytail could be seen standing outside. The girl was roughly the same age as her, and she appeared to be waiting for someone. The despair written on her face was such that it was indescribable.

That afternoon, Jiang Yiyu returned.

What followed and how everything developed was just like the most common of scenes found in love stories. Unable to restrain herself, Shen Xi went downstairs, and in a narrow little corner of the apartment building, she saw that girl’s somewhat trembling backside as she wept with bitter anguish.

“Hi there. I’m Shen Xi. I’m from H City in China. Do you need any help?”

Wiping at her tears, the girl turned her face around and tried hard to put on a smile. It was a sorrowful face, as if the entire world had abandoned her. And that indeed was the reality. Jiang Yiyu was her world, but now, another girl was already living in her world, while she had been deported out of it.

The girl’s name was Ding Ran. She and Jiang Yiyu were boyfriend and girlfriend from high school onwards and all throughout university. Later, Jiang Yiyu had gone abroad first, while in China, she had worked hard and applied to schools. But when she was at last finally able to come here, Jiang Yiyu already had Yang Jiayuan, a girl who could take care of him in all his basic needs and who had been by his side through various holidays.

“He told me to try to understand him from his perspective, but who’s going to try to understand things from my perspective. I gave up a good job and comfortable life back in China. Every day, I would sleep for only six hours a day, just so that I could come here a little earlier to be by his side…” When her words reached this point, Ding Ran was already choked with sobs.

Shen Xi was unable to say any sort of good words of comfort. Ding Ran had taken the future happiness of her life and wagered it, but she had lost—she had lost to the warmth that was right close at hand for him.

She thought of He Zhi Zhou. He Zhi Zhou had said, “Boston has lots of couples like that.”

What type of couples was that?

Shen Xi asked He Zhi Zhou, “He Zhi Zhou, did you already know before that Jiang Yiyu had a girlfriend back at home?”

He Zhi Zhou was not concerned with other people’s lives. However, he did not conceal what he did know, and nodding, he answered, “I’d seen him before a few times. There are some things that you can just tell.”

Shen Xi felt somewhat disheartened. Jiang Yiyu and Ding Ran’s story had brought her down quite a bit. Originally, she had thought it was a love story that was a “hard to come by encounter,” but in the end, it was actually “better to have never had that encounter.”

Meanwhile, Shen Xi’s Boston vacation was soon coming to an end, and she was packing her bags ahead of time.

When He Zhi Zhou came back and saw the luggage that was nearly all packed, his expression was a little dazed, but he soon recovered and was at ease again. He touched her hair briefly and then brought his hand back down. “Time sure passes by quickly.”

Yes, indeed, very quickly.

At the bakery on her last day in Boston, Shen Xi once again ran into Yang Jiayuan, who had pushed open the door and was stepping inside. The two were both feeling a little awkward until Yang Jiayuan spoke up. “Let’s have a cup of coffee together.”

The bakery only had two sets of tables and chairs. As Shen Xi leaned back against the metal-wrought chairback, she was silent, for she really did not know what to say. Yang Jiayuan asked her, “Do you think I did the wrong thing?”

Since she was young, Shen Xi was someone who had strong views of right and wrong, and she was so straightforward that many people could know what she was thinking in just a glance. In her understanding of it, love was very simple. She did not understand why Yang Jiayuan would still be with Jiang Yiyu when she clearly knew that Jiang Yiyu had a girlfriend back in China.

“Even if there wasn’t me, Jiang Yiyu and Ding Ran would still have broken up.” This was what Yang Jiayuan said.

With her head bowed, Shen Xi took a sip of her coffee.

Yang Jiayuan continued, “You don’t believe that?”

Lifting her eyes, Shen Xi stated directly and clearly, “If it’s Jiang Yiyu, then I believe it.”

Yiang Jiayuan laughed. “Shen Xi, I really do like you. I like your honesty and straightforwardness. Because we’re friends, I will give you a little reminder and warning: You turn your nose up at Jiang Yiyu, but can you guarantee that He Zhi Zhou won’t become the next Jiang Yiyu?”

He Zhi Zhou becoming Jiang Yiyu? If He Zhi Zhou did become Jiang Yiyu, she actually did fit the role of Ding Ran. But… From her bag, Shen Xi pulled out a card and paid for the coffee. Before leaving, she stated, “He Zhi Zhou will not become Jiang Yiyu.”

She turned her head. On the street that could be seen through the floor-length window, He Zhi Zhou had parked the bicycle. The simple button-up shirt and pants that were on him were still eye-catching as before. His bearing was tall and straight, and the confidence he carried was innate. Even with that distance between them that was not too close, yet not too far either, it was as if he could see her, and he simply stood there on the opposite side and waited for her, quiet and handsome.

Shen Xi gazed fixedly at He Zhi Zhou for a moment, a smile at the corner of her lips. It seemed, to simply like a person requires only the courage of youth, like you are feeling at the stones as you cross a river. Where it is deep or where it is shallow, you will only know once you have crossed the river. Beneath her feet were sand and rocks, but she did not know at all whether or not her feet would end up being cut by something sharp. However, she understood clearly that if she wanted to see the scenery on the opposite bank, she needed to wade through this river.

It seems that in every love story, there is such a river, and each person is making his or her own different choices. Nevertheless, she still believed and trusted that He Zhi Zhou would cross this river together with her.

There were some things where she had only ever trusted and had never doubted.

Stepping out of the bakery, Shen Xi was about to cross that main street over to He Zhi Zhou’s side, but He Zhi Zhou signaled to her with his eyes that she should not move. He strode over and took her hand, his palm warm and strong.

On the street, people were coming and going, different faces, different skin colour. The sunshine was perfect, and each face appeared to be luminous and distinct.

There were so many people, and the world was so crowded. Squeezing He Zhi Zhou’s hand in hers, Shen Xi said, “He Zhi Zhou, hold tight. Don’t lose me.”

He Zhi Zhou smiled, then nodded, stating one thing: “Don’t worry.”

Additional Comments:

Indeed, many love stories start out similar, but where yours will end up, you will not know until you take the plunge. What we know here is that He Zhi Zhou and Shen Xi have chosen not to waste these beautiful years of their youth and allow one another to pass by. What lies on the river bank on the other side, they will have to see. And I trust it will be… together.

I was looking through the history of this translation. It really has been quite a long ride for us with this one. More than 2.5 years later since it began, we finally are saying goodbye to Shen Xi and He Zhi Zhou. While neither one of us had actually planned on doing this particular translation, Peanuts and I managed to tag team our way through it to make sure you guys could read this happy conclusion for this rather zany couple (well, at least Shen Xi fits the zany description). Thanks, nutty, for bringing this on to the site. Thanks, Peanuts, for all your hard work. And thank you, readers, for coming along on the ride, your patience, and your comments.

Farewell, Shen Xi, He Zhi Zhou, and all your crazy friends, Dou Dou, Monkey, Brawny, and Lin Yu Tang. Cheers, everyone! See you over in You’re My Glory and The Healing Sunshine.

—H

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