Chapter 290 - A Sister's Confession
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*A few hours ago*
Junho was sitting on a couch. Opposite to him was a seemingly empty chair but it was occupied by an invisible spirit while Magrod sat on the table in his Alpaca form. He was staring at the chair where Yisub sat.
"Yisub," Junho began. "You must listen to me very carefully. What I'm about to tell you is not going to be easy for you to hear."
Yisub shifted in his seat. Magrod was able to see him thanks to his demonic powers. He sensed that the boy was nervous but this must be done.
"Magrod will interpret your words to me," Junho continued. "You must know that if you want, you can back out. There's absolutely no rush to do this but if you agree, it'll be good for you."
"Am I going to be punished?" Yisub mumbled.
"He's afraid that he'll be punished," Magrod told Junho.
"No, you won't be punished. On the contrary, we're trying to free you from this half life."
Yisub's ears perked up. "Will I be alive again?" he asked.
"That's impossible," Magrod replied. "The dead can't come back. Once your body is gone, you can't be alive again. Even if you possess someone, it won't be the same as being alive. You will always have to share a body with the original soul of the possessed body. Moreover, if the possessed person dies, his body will also start to rot. You won't be able to live in it. As a ghost, you will be stuck between two worlds."
Magrod did not mince his words but the kid needed to know. He tried to be as gentle as possible in explaining the side effects of being a ghost. Yisub was saddened by the thought of living a life like that.
"I wanted to play soccer," Yisub said in a monotone. "Then go to France and taste croissants. I wanted to take lots of pictures and send them to Eli. I also wanted to buy my sister a lot of makeup. She likes makeup."
Magrod was interpreting his every word to Junho. The old man may not be able to see the ghost but he could feel the boy's quiet excitement and subsequent disappointment. He would not be able to do any of those things in this lifetime and it was torturing Yisub.
"Listen," Junho said. "You may not be able to do all this now. But that doesn't mean you won't get another chance at life. Maybe, you'll come back as someone else. If you're given the chance to reincarnate, you might be able to live a better life."
Yisub looked down at his interlocked hands.
"But it won't be this life," he finally said. He was not angry nor bitter but simply sad. The boy was questioning himself over what he did to deserve this fate.
"No," Junho said. "It won't be this life. But you can't relive one life over and over again. All you can do is, move on."
"I know it sounds bad, kid," Magrod added. "It's normal to be scared but living like this is going to hurt you more. Your parents will grow old, your sister will also age and live her own life. She might be naive but she'll have a family someday and they'll occupy her mind. You'll see them and become sad for not being able to talk to them. That pain is worse than the fear of the unknown life after death. It's for your own good."
"Let us help you," Junho said. "You should move on to the Afterlife. It'll be much better than being a ghost with no place to go back to."
Yisub was quiet for a while. "I want to see my grave," he requested.
He was not sure why he made that request but something in his heart was making him want to see his grave. For a long time, Yisub avoided going there but he had a feeling that he might be able to make a decision if he went there.
"Alright," Junho nodded when Magrod told him of Yisub's request. "We'll take you there."
…
A while later, Junho pulled up in front of a large cemetery on the south of the city. It was a bright, sunny day. The large landscape of the cemetery lay in front of them, looking more like a neatly trimmed park with a long walkway in between the tombstones.
The tombstones were made with cement and slab, smoothened out expertly. There were wooden nameplates on the graves, marking the owners. It was deserted at that time of the day because it was a weekday and most people were at work.
"Look for his name and date of death," Junho told Magrod. "Stay with him."
Magrod nodded and went off with Yisub to look for the latter's grave. Yisub was not looking at the graves but rather following the feeling in his heart. It was the same connection he felt whenever his twin sister was around.
Why was it pulling him when he was already dead?
"Kid, I can't find your grave- '' Magrod was saying but Yisub had stopped in his tracks.
He was staring at something in front of him. Magrod frowned and followed Yisub's gaze only to realize that there was someone else in the graveyard.
"Isn't that your sister?" Magrod asked. Eli was standing in front of a grave. She was in her uniform, clearly ditching school. Her expression was unreadable as she stared at her brother's grave.
Without a word, Yisub apparated beside her. For a moment, Eli shivered and looked around but there was no one in sight. But her heart was beating fast and she felt a familiar presence, yet she could not pinpoint at it.
"Why?" She whispered. "Why do I still feel that you're somewhere around, Yisub bro?"
People had been questioning her seemingly cold and indifferent reaction to Yisub's death but she could explain to them that she simply did not feel any loss. Even though she was selfish in dealing with Yisub, she still loved him. Eli felt guilty for not crying or being sad over her brother's death and yet, she kept on having the nagging feeling that he was not entirely gone.
Today, however, she was restless. A slow sense of loss was creeping into her heart as if she was no longer going to feel her brother's presence. It started an hour ago and she could not help ditching school to visit the graveyard.
"You…" Eli said to her brother's grave. "Are you really gone?"
Yisub did not reply but quietly listened to his sister talking to him.
"I don't know why but I think you're still here," Eli went on, her voice becoming thicker with every word. "Are you okay? Can you see me? Or am I imagining things?"
The tombstone in front of her did not answer her. She was hesitant for days, avoiding the graveyard but for some reason, her twin senses were egging her to visit her brother's tomb. Eli was slowly coming out of denial. By coming to the graveyard, she was starting to realize that her brother was no more.
"I…I was always jealous of you," she admitted, trying to control her tears. "Mom and dad always fussed over you. Your needs were more important than mine. You needed protection while I was ignored…"
Behind her, Yisub was still watching her. His innocent mind was unaware of the feelings like jealousy and envy but he knew his sister was crying because of him. Did he hurt her?
"And I hated you so much for trying to interfere in my relationship with Myungsoo!" Eli sobbed. "I really did. I thought that if I did bad things, mom and dad would notice me. I wanted their love and attention. I really wanted to hate you."
Hate. She hated him. Yisub was sad and hung his head low.
His sister wanted him to leave. He was about to turn around when Eli exclaimed, "But who the hell told you to really go away? Why are you gone? I wanted to hate you forever and ever but I want you to be with us! I want you with me so that I can hate you! I want to see you everyday and…s-scold you! I want to be jealous and annoyed at you everyday! At least you'll…b-b-be here with me! What if I screw up again? Who will protect me?"
She was wailing hard, her cheeks burning with tears.
"I can't hate you now because you're not here! Who's going to nag me? Whom will I be jealous of? A-And who will annoy me with his silly questions? I…I…I want to feel your presence forever! We're twins, right? We were born together! Who told you to leave like this?"
She fell to the ground, crying hard. The faint connection between them was starting to fade and she was desperate to hold on to it.
"I don't know if you're here or not…" she sobbed. "But I hate you. I hate you for being better than me. I hate you for always being right. I hate your innocence."
"But most of all, I hate the fact that you're not here with me, bro. I really…I…"
Eli broke down in front of her brother's grave, trying to hold on to the faint bond she felt with her twin. She wanted to hate him so that she could keep on feeling his presence.
"I'm sorry!" She cried. "I'm sorry for not telling you how much I miss you! Please…don't…don't leave thinking that I don't want you. J-Just be happy wherever you are. I-I'll take care of mom and dad. I'll be good to them and make sure they don't forget you. So…"
She took a deep breath and said, "So, you can rest now."
Yisub faintly smiled at his sister. Eli was crying alone but she was not lonely.
"I…I will always look over you," he said slowly. "Goodbye, sister."
Junho and Magrod were watching the scene from afar. Junho did not need Magrod to interpret Yisub's actions because he knew that Eli's tears were enough to make Yisub decide on what to do.
He sighed and turned to Magrod.
"Let's go-" he was saying before pausing to stare at the demon in dismay. Magrod was teary eyed, wiping his nose with his paws.
"Are you crying?" Junho frowned.
"I'm not crying!" Magrod wailed. "Someone's cutting onions around me!"
"This is a graveyard."
"I don't care! There are onions here!" The demon cried. "I'm not crying at the brother-sister duo! I d-d-don't c-c-care…"
Junho shook his head as Magrod let out his 'onion' tears. He turned to Yisub and his sister. Yisub was not saying anything but simply watched over his sister as she cried her heart out, finally coming to terms with his death.
This was goodbye.
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