Clearing The World That's Inside A Novel

Chapter 45: A Dear Friend

(Demon Lord's Pov)

I didn't know who I should thank. God? Devil? Whoever it is, I wanted them to know I was grateful to them.

Finally, I found him.

His back towards me, 2 butterflies made out of water flying around him, the beast named Eumon offered him ...food, and nuzzled Noah with his horn.

Noah seemed to be complaining about the food he had been given.

That made me stifle a laugh and helped me calm down a little.

I was angry at him for disappearing, happy to see him again, confused as to not know what I meant to him, and.. nervous. Even though I wanted to talk to him, it was hard to call out his name, it was as if the words were stuck in my throat, refusing to come out.

I took a deep breath as I thought to myself 'It's fine.' I finally called out to him, making sure to keep my voice calm.

"You ...seem to be enjoying yourself"

...or I tried to keep it as calm as possible, I was grateful he kept his back towards me.

'Calm down, you are the demon lord!'

I told myself once again.

With my presence known the beasts around me all started to roar, and I waved my hand towards them, telling them to dismiss themselves, I wanted to be left alone with Noah, most of them went away and some kept themselves indulged in enjoying themselves.

I started moving towards him.

"Yup, I am having some relaxation time," he said, his voice as always devoid of any emotion.

For some reason, it helped me feel calm down but it reminded me something Elina had told me, something I didn't know about him till now.

"I really didn't think you would be here, if not for Elina's help, I probably would have never figured it out," I said, standing beside him as the wind hit me, the sunlight shining upon my face, I didn't scrunch my eyes though.

Elina has 'those eyes', only a few Elves have them, I can count the number of Elves I have met with a single hand who have had those special eyes.

It would be a lie to say that I wasn't interested in learning about him but what Elina told me wasn't what I expected, not at all.

According to her, the air surrounding Noah is dark, so dark it's as if the world itself has cursed him.

But it helped me make sense of lots of things, after all, no sane person would go and have a dive in lava, prepared to be crushed by the water pressure, have their body be splintered all the while managing to get back on his feet right after his injuries are healed, his complete lack of fear and so many more things.

"It really took you too long," He said and I simply nodded, sitting beside him.

8 days to be precise, I had tried to look for him but couldn't find him anywhere, in the end on the 3rd day I returned to the castle.

After talking with Elina for a while I understood Noah is crazy enough to go to a place where all my beasts reside despite being so weak, well I have brought him here along with me a lot of times, so these guys already know him.

It was kind of stupid of me to not have thought about coming here.

Shaking me out of my thoughts the water beast named 'Nazu' that Noah was petting came towards me and started nuzzling me.

Noah's gaze lingered on Nazu for a second, it felt like he was cursing the world ...like a child.

...

I looked at him surprised as he questioned me "What?"

... For the first time, it felt like he wasn't on guard around me, for the first time there was something I could discern about his thoughts.

"Ptff!"

I laughed and laughed and laughed while he complained.

"So, how are things on your end?" He asked.

His words sounded as if he was confirming.

I took a deep breath as I thought back to what happened when I had returned to the castle.

Liza came to me along with Elina, Ruby, and George who had brought the alternative cure for us, demons.

When I heard it, I was a bit baffled. After all, it wasn't a piece of news I had expected to ever hear.

But then the worried voice of Liza asking me if I was all right brought to me a realization.

The gazes of my own kind which I have been ignoring.

They were looking at me worried. At me? That seemed like a joke but when I looked at my appearance it started making sense.

And it helped me understand what that girl had meant when she said Noah had planned it, all it took was for me to ask them if they knew about Noah, and while the other two looked confused, Elina said she did.

It was like everything started to click itself.

My reply to their alternative was simple 'I accept, we shall wait and see how it works for 6 months, shall we face a single loss, I will have your heads but should it work, I will grant you the freedom your kind longs for'

From there on, it's just work and work.

But...

"I don't like how you used me, my feelings to be exact. " I complained, the anger I had thought I wouldn't let out came all at once "You could have just told me that you know of a cure, I would have stopped it all if you had just asked, if you didn't like it, I wouldn't even eat whether there's a cure or not! So why didn't you just ask? I told you I think of you as an important person, a dear friend!" I questioned raising my voice a little higher.

I wasn't kidding, I really would have had stopped it all if he asked me, hell even if there was no alternative and he would have had asked me not to eat other kinds, I wouldn't have. I would gladly give him my life if he simply asked.

For me, he was the first person who became important to me after my parents died, my parents whose faces I can't even remember anymore.

As I shouted I also realized I wanted him to trust me.

"Just a little would have done, just a little trust" I felt my voice wavering a little as I looked at him in the eyes, his black eyes with an empty look, like always, waiting for him to say something.

"You are dumb" He answered as he looked away from me, towards the butterfly he had made, twirking it a little.

It angered me but before I could say anything else he spoke.

"I don't hate you, so don't worry even if you can't discern anything about me even after looking at me."

Those sudden words of his shook me to the core.

"If I had asked you to not eat other species, you wouldn't? That's stupid. I can tell you this, if I had to kill the world, the children, the pregnant, the elderly, a man, a teenager, a newborn baby, to save myself then I would gladly do so. If drenching myself in sin is what I need to do to survive, I will and I would never hate myself for it."

I felt confused, unable to understand what he was trying to say or maybe...I knew, I just didn't want to know.

"See? I am much more of a bad person than you. So, don't hate yourself, don't doubt yourself. You walked the path you had available to you and that's okay. Besides, I ate along with you. Did it ever feel like I had a problem? Don't worry about stupid stuff like that."

....

My trembling hand reached his, grasping it, I somehow managed to choke the words out "Then, why didn't you trust me?" I asked, feeling stupid I know what Elina had told me but just because I knew something didn't change anything about my emotions. I wanted him to trust me. I wanted him to tell me about himself despite having learned how incapable he should be of all those things.

I felt like a selfish, horrible person.

"The world doesn't work like that. Masses would bend the very words of their own god if they felt like it, all the while revering their god. That's just how they are. You know it too, right? It was the best way to introduce the cure."

I knew what he meant, I knew but that wasn't what I wanted to-

"Besides who said I don't trust you? If I didn't, I wouldn't have let you see my sleeping face all those times and do something about those nails, when you poke my cheeks it really hurts."

My body shook, and my eyes widened, I looked at him as he shrugged.

...He knew.

Whenever he felt burnt out I had brought him here, so that he could rest, of course, it was always in the disguise of an excuse.

I watched him sleep while he thought I left him alone, at least that's what I thought.

I felt a sudden rush of heat, flushing my cheeks, completely embarrassed but I also felt as if a huge burden was lifted off of me.

"You worry about stupid stuff, I don't mind how you are or who you are. I trust you within reasons, I can't trust you with my life though, that I won't do for anyone and yes, I used you, your feelings for my own purpose, well it's not only you who I used"

"Elina, you used her too," I said and he nodded but despite that, I didn't feel any anger. I felt like I understood him more than before and ...my feelings grew a bit more stronger.

I really don't want to part with him.

Ah, it reminds me.

"Elina told me to tell you something," I said, he tilted his head and I continued " 'My brother is dead. I am grateful to you for changing the world in the way it's going to be from now on but I don't think I would forgive you for all the people that died because of Marcus or you. I am not going to say I have a better plan so, I know, it must sound stupid but I hate you for the way you went about it. That's just how I feel, thankful to you and hateful to you, weird, isn't it?' ... Well that's all she said"

"...She sure is a complicated person. I feel bad for her. Her emotions have so many ups and downs ...it's amazing how she hadn't lost it yet, I ain't ever meeting her again"

He is such a jerk.

I noticed sweat trickling down him and softly asked.

"...How many ranks did you go up?"

From there on I told him about what an absolute moron he is for what he did.

And learned about something I probably shouldn't have had.

Another world, fairies, hidden dungeons, dungeons.

For a moment there I couldn't help but doubt if I had a will of my own, were my thoughts and actions simply ... orchestrated?

But.. his reasoning and strong denial helped me calm down, somewhat.

No, I think it was precisely because I had felt a strong denial from him, an emotion that he doesn't show usually which helped me calm down a little.

It felt a bit weird...

He told me about his 'mission'. I couldn't help but laugh.

But I finally understood why he said he would leave.

3 months.

That's the time limit he has.

There was nothing that I could do to stop it.

I was weak, far too weak to do anything.

Just like before, I will once again lose something important to me all because I am weak.

I clenched my fist.

But I held back my anger and kept a calm tone.

"What would you do if I destroyed the world?" I asked jokingly but ...I was serious.

If I destroyed it, will he be unable to go back, if so I will gladly destroy it all.

But his response was as always, unwavering.

It seemed like even destroying the world wouldn't stop him.

That stung.

That stung.

I feel hurt.

More so than before.

Far more than before.

It was happening again.

All over again.

I needed to leave.

I didn't want him to see me.

So, I stood up and prepared to leave.

"Well, I guess I will go now that you have decided to abandon me and work with that lass that showed up recently to make the world a more bit peaceful for everyone."

The word abandon stung but that's how I honestly felt.

I didn't want to be abandoned. Not again.

"Here" I threw a drive towards him as I explained "It contains all the things you still haven't learned from me. You can watch them when you do grow stronger and learn from it" I said shruggingly.

We didn't speak anything to each other, I wanted to say something, talk about lots of other things too but no matter what I couldn't choke those words out, and for some reason, I had a feeling we wouldn't see each other again, no it was me who was cutting the connection by giving him the pen drive.

But I really won't be able to part with him if not now. Meeting him again would just make it worse and worse.

And just when I was about to leave.

"Enyo"

An indifferent voice called out to me and countless memories that once were faded started to return or should I say, I remembered something that I shouldn't have forgotten.

A gentle voice of a man who had once stoked my hair, the soothing voice of a woman who had sung me a lullaby.

That was my name.

One I had forgotten.

One I shouldn't have forgotten.

One that I should have clung onto.

"How's that for a name? Make sure you don't forget it this time" I turned towards him, only to see his stupid, clumsy, awkward smile.

I won't.

I promised myself.

I won't let it go this time.

I would never let it go.

And I will have lots of people call me by this name, they all need to know and know the name given to me by the people precious to me.

This time, I won't let it change to some title.

!

It happened suddenly.

His body felt like it was vanishing into thin air. I felt shocked and so did he.

"Wait, what? Ah, I see. Damn girl, you were 'thinking' to destroy the world. Chill and make some new friends, friends who won't abandon you, maybe be friends with Elina? You both got played by me. Comradie in being used by the same person or something? I don't know"

"Don't ever think about being a comedian!"

"And there goes one of my future prospects. Sad. Wait, I wasn't joking."

His image was vanishing, faster with each passing second.

I wanted to say something but I didn't know what.

I wanted him to remember me, I wanted to tell him something, something he wouldn't forget.

And then I remembered what Elina had said.

'A child cursed by the world'

And just when he was about to disappear completely, I shouted at the top of my lungs with a smile on my face.

"I am happy to have met you! Happy that you were born! Happy, so so happy!"

His figure completely disappeared and I hoped he had heard my words.

Seconds passed, then minutes, and soon I couldn't hold it back as the tears dampened my cheeks.

It was only for about 3 months, but I had a friend, a dear friend.

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