Beers and Beards: A Cozy Dwarf Tale

Chapter 35: Interlude: Somewhere Else

On the side of a cliff there stood a white stone gazebo. Mist fell from a great waterfall that stretched beneath it, vanishing into the clouds below. A black mountain rose up behind it, seeming to touch the sky. A circular marble table sat in the centre of the gazebo, and a group of cloaked figures sat around it in ornate wooden chairs.

“It’s unacceptable!” A stately feminine voice bellowed. There was a crack as a fist pounded the table. The mountain trembled at the impact and for a brief moment the waterfall lifted into the sky.

“He hasn’t technically broken any rules.” A cultured voice drawled.

The woman wheeled upon a man reading a book beside her. Her skin was the colour of a warm summer’s night, and each of her ebony hairs was perfectly in its place. Otherworldly jewels adorned her pointed ears, and a gown of gossamer moonlight fell from her shoulders and flowed to the ground. “Why aren’t you the most upset about this? He would have chosen you, Archis!”

The human man pushed some glasses up his nose. His skin, hair, and eyes were all white, with golden highlights in the hair at his temples. He wore a superbly tailored, but simple scholar’s robe covered in pockets. Each pocket contained a book or writing instrument. “You assume I even wanted him, Lunara. Besides, I already knew this was going to happen; I made a deal.”

“Why would you agree to that? What deal could possibly be worth the soul of a Chosen Catalyst?”

“Because we did the math.” A gruff voice interjected. “He’d have been dead long before he got that Blessin’.” A dwarf’s shaggy head peaked over the lip of the table. A pair of black eyes, gleaming with the stoked flames of a forge, glowered at the elven woman. A thick and curly black beard bristled with barely contained emotion.

“It doesn’t matter.” Another voice cut in. A man with bronze skin speckled by faint blue scales stood up at the head of the table. A mane of silver hair parted around a pair of azure horns on his forehead, and he opened a mouth filled with razor sharp teeth to speak. “Barck, you have broken our most fundamental rule, and there must be consequences.”

“Shut it Solen! I paid for his soul, and had tha’ right to claim it!” The dwarf growled.

“Paid too much for it, I say.” A man with the delicate ears and beady nose of a serval stretched his lips in a Cheshire smile. He wore the fine silks and vest of a merchant, and every inch of him spoke of great wealth. His soft voice was carried on a breeze that brought it to every ear at the table.

“I paid what I thought it was worth, Aaron.” The dwarf narrowed his eyes.

“You still haven’t given him the chance to win it back.” The beastfolk countered.

“I haven’t denied him that chance either!”

“I approve.” Another voice broke in. All eyes turned to face a woman sitting at the foot of the table. Her form was at first that of a small human child, then an old elven woman. She became a mother grieving at losing a child, and then a grandmother broken by years of toil. “Archis’s Chosen are always so boring, and this one amuses me. Let Barck keep him.”

“Of course, Yearn likes him.” The elven woman muttered.

“I’m fine with it.” A tiny gnomess sitting on raised chair put forward. She wore the overalls and leathers of a hard-working miner or farmer. Her green hair was done up in a pair of pigtails, and her skin was weathered and tanned. Her simple appearance was belied by the richness of her attire, which was all of the highest quality and studded with gems. “Barck was acting in the Chosen’s best interests, and he did technically own the soul already. What do you think, Midna?”

“Don’t ask me, Tiara!” A disheveled human woman waved her hand dismissively. Her blonde mullet swayed as she shook her head from side to side. She wore the clothing of an adventurer. Not the kind that fought monsters, but one of the original explorers. Her leathers were worn with hard use, and her pouches bulged with curios. “I agree that Barck broke the spirit of the laws, but he did so within them. I say leave the punishment to Solen.”

“Fine. We will put it to a vote.” The dragon held up his hand. “On the punishment of Barck for violating the Absolute Right. Hands up for Yea.”

Four hands went up. Three stayed down.

“I thought you approved of it, Yearn!” The dwarf roared.

“I changed my mind.” A small elven girl giggled.

“Four yeas, three nays, and my abstention. The yeas have it. Barck, for violating the Absolute Right of Peter Samson, you are sanctioned. The board is hidden from you and you may not know the movements or status of any other Chosen. You may not grant them quests, nor speak to them through any means.”

“Bah!” The dwarf spat to the side. “I dinnae care.”

“I know, so in addition I levy one generation of souls against you.”

The gnomess gasped, and the dwarf stumbled back a bit as though struck. An old woman’s wheezing laughter turned into the mocking roar of a female dragon at the foot of the table.

“That is a bit much, Solen.” The man with the book raised a perfectly arched eyebrow.

“Do you want to Host, Archis?” The dragon hissed, and smoke curled from his nose.

“Once was enough for me, thank you.”

The dragon turned to the dwarf. “Your sentence is passed. Leave my pavilion.”

“You’re going to regret pushing me out. Ya may have blocked me from the board, but I’m playin' a higher game.” The dwarf shot over his shoulder as he stood up and marched out.

Barck stepped down the stairs, and a gleaming opaque rainbow shell enveloped the gazebo behind him. He began to walk around the mountain as he hummed to himself.

Barck opened his hand and a glass appeared in it. The glass was quite tall and oddly shaped; it looked more like a vase than a tankard. A golden image of a cheerful gnome was etched upon it. The dwarf frowned and ran his hand over the etching, which disappeared and was replaced with the golden image of a dwarf raising his tankard in a toast. The dwarf smiled and in an instant the glass was filled with an amber liquid. The faint scent of lemons wafted from the glass, and the rich vapours poured down over the mountain.

“Yes, it will all be worth it. Perhaps he’ll even be able to fix everything.” Barck smiled, and took a drink that lasted an age.

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