Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu‎

Volume 3, The Seventh Question

Please answer the following question.

"When the observer A moves with a velocity V, an ambulance with a sound frequency of f moves forward with a speed of v'. Please state what will happen when the speed of sound is at V? What kind of phenomenon is this?

Himeji Mizuki's answer:

"The observer A will hear the siren at a frequency of f(V+v')/(V-v'). This phenomenon is known as the Doppler Effect."

Teacher's comment:

The same phenomenon will also appear during an F1 race. Though most people often feel that physics phenomenon are rather rare, they do often occur in our everyday life.

Yoshii Akihisa's answer:

"The observer A gets knocked away at a speed of v'+v. This phenomenon is called a traffic accident."

Teacher's comment:

Seeing you write this relative velocity makes me even angrier.

"Sensei, to think that you actually expected me to make it all the way here. The other teachers were all rather optimistic that I wouldn't be able to make it all the way here, right?"

"I don't ever underestimate an opponent. You're an idiot, but that mobility of yours can't be underestimated."

"Then I really have to thank you—hiya!"

I use my wooden sword to skilfully dodge Ironman's sudden punch.

I won't be as careless as the last time. Even if Ironman fights physically, I have to treat him as if he's a tough summoned beast!

"However, it will be great if you can use the mobility on other aspects. You're just a group of sexual harassers. Aren't you afraid of being suspended?"

The shocking kick that looks like it's coming over at a terrifying speed flies towards me. If I am really hit by him, I'll be left with half a life even if I don't die!

"I won't be threatened by you! We gathered so many people, you can't lock onto a target. The school can't suspended just a group of students, right?"

I duck and move forward, raising my wooden sword and hack it at Ironman's abdomen. However, Ironman's huge arm easily swings my attacks aside. Is it the so-called flesh armour?

"Since you know that you may be suspended, why don't you people love yourselves more?"

"If you want to suspend us, you'll have to memorise all the names of the students taking part in this!"

Using the reflex speed of being knocked aside, I lift my leg and step forward. Even though I hit Ironman's completely undefended leg, the unstable and swaying thing isn't Ironman, but my summoned beast. No matter how light a summoned beast is, it isn't a real body.

"And you dare say that! I'll beat all of you one by one, and then record the names of every single one of you!"

"—Ku!"

Before my summoned beast manages to stabilise itself, it takes a punch attack that's not too heavy before flying to the corner of the wall. The moment the summoned beast flies to the wall, the sharp pain is passed onto my body.

"And you're the first one!"

In order to seize onto the opportunity, Ironman charges towards my summoned beast at lightning speed. If I want to beat that guy who's like a monster, one summoned beast alone isn't going to be enough.

What should I do? Do I give up now and run away? Do I kneel down in front of my comrades and beg for mercy? No, I won't let this happen! Since I made it all the way, even if my teeth are to be beaten out and blood spilled, I have to win this battle! I~~WON'T GIVE UP!

"Let's go—double!"

The moment I commanded it, another summoned beast appears in response.

"KU! YOSHII, YOU BASTARD!"

After blocking the attack of the other summoned beast that suddenly appeared, Ironman jumps away in shock and maintains a suitable distance.

If one summoned beast isn't enough, I'll just summon an additional one. Good thing I have this power, this is the great power that I got from before.

"Is it the platinum bracelets? The principal can really find trouble for me."

Ironman's casual look is no longer present.

This is the prize I won from the previous summoning tournament--the platinum bracelets. Yuuji's bracelet's ability creates a summoning field, and my bracelet has the ability to summon an additional summoned beast. As long as I use this ability properly, beating Ironman isn't just a dream.

"Sensei, the real show starts now!"

The two summoned beast get into battle positions, moving about as they surround Ironman. The main summoned beast is on the right, the secondary one's on the left as both of them swing their wooden swords at Ironman at the same time.

"Ugh, ku!"

Being attacked from different directions at the same time, Ironman loses his balance for a while. The next moment, the two summoned beasts let out heavy attacks on Ironman's kneecaps, which are still weak. However, Ironman lets his kneecaps sink and lets the strong thighs endure the attacks of the summoned beasts, and the pain bounces back onto me as if I attacked a tire.

My summoned beasts heavily attack Ironman with fists, kicks and wooden swords. The situation is completely reversed now. Ironman's clearly in the disadvantage, and my attacks cleanly hit the flesh. However—

"It's not damaging him at all!"

Ironman's defending his head and chest while using only his strong body to deflect the rest of my attacks. Damn it, this guy's definitely a monster.

"What now, Yoshii? You seem to be a lot more anxious now."

Seeing my slightly panicking look, Ironman inadvertently lets out a smirk.

On first glance, it seemed like I have the advantage, but the situation now is extremely critical, for I need to think of both the main and secondary summoned beasts' actions at the same time. I have to make instant decisions to decide whether to allow either the main beast or the secondary to dodge the kick before both summoned beasts can either attack or defend. It's too hard to think of two people's movements at the same time, and if this keeps up, it might not be too good.

"BUT EVEN SO, I WILL NOT ADMIT DEFEAT!"

I let my main summoned beast swing its wooden sword and the secondary beast swings its right fist. After dodging the wooden sword, Ironman gets hit by the punch and counters with his kneecap. His target is the secondary—no, is it the main? I quickly raise my arms to create a cross guard and let my secondary beast swing its left elbow at Ironman's abdomen. However, Ironman blocks the elbow and does a leg sweep, intending to attack the main beast, no, the secondary—

"Your movements are becoming even slower, Yoshii!"

"Ku!"

I feel a sharp pain from my right wrist. Which side got attacked? The main or the secondary? Wah, oh no! The moment I stopped attacking, Ironman went in for the kill. Anyway, lets swing the wooden sword to block it—no! It's too late!

This time, it's a fist at the secondary beast—seems like it, but isn't he aiming at the main beast? Damn it, it's a feint!

"Gu, hu!"

I endure a sharp pain in my chest as my back lands on the floor.

"End of the line, Yoshii."

The winner is decided. Ironman seem to be declaring his own victory as he reverts back to his nonchalant look.

Seeing his thick, muscular arms that are like a live armour, my attacks aren't even tickling him, let alone scratching.

Maybe it's too reckless for me to summon two summoned beasts. Even if I'm to concentrate, my mind will get too confused until I am unable to decide what instructions to give to my summoned beasts. No, before I can worry about being unable to control two summoned beasts at the same thing, the most important thing is that I'm unable to deal damage to the opponent.

"Even if it's to fulfil that fleeting perverseness of yours, your concentration is only to this extent!"

Ironman slowly walks towards me as I continue to remain on the ground.

That's right, Ironman's right. My concentration isn't enough, which is why I'm unable to control my summoned beasts' movements properly.

But even if I understand this, I can't just gain enough concentration to control two summoned beasts at the same time. Seems like I lose this time, better to give up on peeping, and start training myself to concentrate! Concentrate—concentrate?

"That's it!"

With enthusiasm, I get up from the floor. That's right, there's still this method!

"Oh…so you still want to fight? Only your determination is stronger than others."

Seeing me stand up again, Ironman seem rather happy as he reveals a snarl. No matter when the situation is, this guy will always show a careful attitude. However, continue smiling, for right now, I'll make you unable to smile ever again!

"Ironman, I got to thank you for giving me this hint."

"The hint I gave you?"

"Didn't you just say 'concentrate'?"

Since I gave different instructions to the two summoned beasts, I got myself confused. If I'm to attack different parts and when the opponent increases his guard, those punches and kicks won't be able to show their real power. This is the problem that I'm facing now, but there's a way to settle this.

"That's right, it's to concentrate! I need to reduce the attack area. No matter it's a punch, kick, or wooden sword swing, main beast or secondary beast, from now on, my attacks just need to focus on one area."

If one attack isn't enough to break through that muscle armour of his, then I'll have to attack the same place multiple times.

Concentrate! Right now, I need to focus all my attacks on a certain piece—

"I'll focus all my attacks on your balls!"

"You, you bastard, how can you have such a terrifying thought!?"

"WATCH THIS, IRONMAN!"

The attack that looks like a hook downwards is actually a feint that's going to change into a flying kick that's aimed there. Once the flying kick is out, the wooden sword will be thrust at Ironman's crotch. Also, the punch that was aimed at the chest will change trajectory and move towards the abdomen. All this is to attack Ironman's important place!

"Damn it, this is the first time I met someone who's intent on attacking the lower body…"

Ironman isn't looking calm now.

The real show starts now! My summoned beast aims at his abdomen, and looks like it's about to grab his elbow, but is actually attacking between his thighs. I'll attack his lower body, attack, attack, attack. Anyway, I'll continue to attack his balls!

Recovering myself, I realise that Ironman's expending a lot of energy just to defend himself.

"GO TO HELL, IRONMAN!!!"

Since he can't attack, my summoned beast will release a heavy punch with lots of strength stored in it.

"KUUH!!"

Ironman frantically reaches his hand out to block his crotch.

"Hehe, you got fooled, eh?"

But in an instant, the main beast has already bent down to act as a jump board and let the secondary summoned beast jump towards Ironman's back. But this movement is a feint, the one who's really attacking is still the main beast!

"Damn—"

"WATCH ME NOW!"

Using his hands to guard his lower body, Ironman is unable to protect his head in time. Thus, my summoned beast hacks at Ironman's head without any defense on it.

"Ku…Yo, Yoshii, you bastard…"

With a thonk, Ironman can't support himself anymore and gradually falls to the ground.

"Finally…IT'S FINALLY OVER!"

Such a long journey! I wanted to give up so many times, and it's not just once that I felt despair. But at this moment, the Fantasy Heaven is right in front of me.

"Minami's flat chest, wait for me!"

Those photos that represents the dreamworld are right in front of me! I'm so happy that I'm unable to—eh? There's a killing intent?

"WATCH THIS!"

Maybe it's my basic instincts, but I immediately ducked. The next moment, I immediately discover some biri biri sound passing through where my head was.

"I won't hand onee-sama's virginity over to you!"

"Shimizu-san!"

Holding a seemingly familiar taser in her hand, Shimizu-san appeared in front of me. Isn't that the 200,000 volts taser that Yuuji lent me? Once hit, even if it's an attack that's blocked by clothing, will immediately render anyone unconscious. That taser is definitely a dangerous weapon!

"Onee-sama was rather lost ever since last night, and wouldn't even look at Miharu. THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT! SHOW YOUR REMORSE TO MIHARU WITH YOUR DEATH!"

Shimizu-san waves the weapon in her hand, but compared to Ironman's speed, her movements are so slow, they're basically telling me to dodge them.

"YOU BASTARD! DAMN IT! DAMN IT!!"

"Heh, hoh!"

I easily dodge all of Shimizu-san's attacks. Seeing this situation, I just need to wait for her to exhaust herself, right?

Just as I'm thinking about how to fight, she seemed to have found out about my intent, as she reaches into her pocket and pulls out something in front of me.

"If you aren't going to be obedient, I'll spread these photos around!"

"Eh? You said photos—WAH! THOSE ARE EMBARRASSING PHOTOS OF ME!!"

Isn't Shimizu-san holding photos of me in girls' outfit? Why does she have these photos? Is it—

"—Shimizu-san, don't tell me you like me?"

"YOU MAKE ME SICK!"

I inadvertently shed a tear.

"However, why do you have photos of me?"

"That was because when I was taking photos of onee-sama in a cheongsam, I saw you in such a disgusting state, and felt that I could use it to blackmail you, so I took them! I have no interest in you lousy men!"

There's no need to call me a lousy man, right!? Never mind, anyway, everyone has their own preference.

"Shimizu-san, do you have a burn on your butt?"

"How, how do you know about that? Were you peeping or taking photos of me?"

Can't be mistaken, Shimizu-san's the culprit I'm looking for. If so, Kudou-san isn't the culprit then? So she wasn't lying to me.

"Anyway, I advise you to be obedient, or else I'll spread these embarrassing photos of yours!"

Shimizu-san is no longer pretending as she blackmails me. Oh~ looks like I have to punish her a bit.

"Hoo!"

"AHH! RETURN THAT TO ME!"

I snatch the taser in her hand and decrease the voltage output to the minimum.

—Psst!

"My, my body's numb now!"

Before Shimizu-san can react, she falls unconscious onto the ground.

"Now, all the enemies are dealt with, right?"

The main culprit behind this was exterminated by me, and now, no one can stop me.

"…Akihisa."

A voice calls me from behind. This voice is—

"Muttsulini! You alright?"

"…Of course I am."

Muttsulini's obviously tired all over. Seems like he got into quite a tough battle, huh? However, he doesn't look too weary from the battle, but shows a rather delighted smile.

"Nice going, Akihisa!"

"Yuuji! And everyone's here!"

Yuuji and the other boys from the other classes are here. Everyone's showing their smiles of having achieved their objective.

"Yoshii, you really beat Ironman!"

"The MVP undoubtedly goes to you."

The voices of my comrades praising me continue to spread.

"It's thanks to everyone's help! EVERYONE, THANK YOU VERY MUCH!"

My shout got everyone's response. I really want to thank everyone present.

"Alright, we should get moving!"

It's rare for Yuuji to show such an excited expression, but this guy is a normal man! Seeing that we're about to reach our goal, anyone will praise themselves for this.

"EVERYONE! WE HAVE NUMBERS HERE, AND THE SCHOOL CAN'T LOCK ONTO THE SUSPECTS. AND NOW THAT WE CLEARED OUT ALL OF THE TROUBLESOME PEOPLE, WE DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT BEING SUSPENDED OR EXPELLED, SO PEEP ALL YOU WANT!!!"

"WOOOOHHHH!!!"

The roars of everyone seem like it almost flipped the roof off.

We have so many people here, how can the teachers remember everyone? In other words, we won't have to worry about being suspended. Everyone's clear about this, so of course we have to seize this opportunity!

"EVERYONE, WIDEN YOUR EYES AND WATCH CAREFULLY, THIS IS THE UNEQUALED GLORY WE FOUGHT SO HARD TO WIN!"

Yuuji pushes the girls' bathroom door aside.

Skin with lots of tension.

Skinny body and limbs.

Waist length white hair.

This is a face all of us are familiar with, and that naked body that we are unfortunate to see right now since it is normally kept under the closes.

If we miss it now, we may never see it again—

"You, what's with you people! Gathering so many people here, are you here to see this old granny's naked body!?"

We just saw the principal in a sexy position.

"HOW DID IT END UP LIKE THIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!"

All of us start to shed manly tears due to this inexplicable scene.

"Good morning, Minami-chan."

"Ah, it's Mizuki. Good morning…"

"What's wrong? You look rather tired. Is something wrong?"

"It, it's nothing! There's no such thing! I'm just a little tired!"

"Is that so? It's true that last week's training camp was rather troublesome, so it can't be helped if you're tired."

"Ah, mm. A lot of really troublesome things happened…"

"However, the boys were all pale with shock. What exactly happened?"

"Ah, that? Well, who knows~ did they see something shocking?"

"Something shocking, huh…?"

"Even the principal who was visiting seemed shocked. Who asked the boys to come up with such a commotion?"

"You're talking about the second year boys peeping? It was Akihisa-kun and the rest who started this, but it ended up being blown out of proportion."

"Yeah…oh yeah, speaking of peeping, didn't we find a camera inside the changing room? As for the real culprit…"

"Eh? The real culprit? It's not Akihisa-kun and the rest who set it up?"

"No, that one seemed like it was installed by Miharu."

"That Miharu you're talking about, is it Shimizu Miharu?"

"Yeah! On the last day of training camp, I just so happened to see her pull out a camera from the changing room. After some interrogation, she admitted that her reason was to 'take photos of onee-sama', and admitted her guilt."

"What? So this means that Akihisa-kun and the rest…"

"Seems like we misunderstood. However, they still became peeping toms in the end, so it's a little strange to apologise to them…"

"Ah, ah haha…"

"On a side note, I confiscated Miharu's camera, so there's no need to worry."

"I see~ that's good to know."

"Mn, it's about time for self-study. Let's hurry."

"Ah, you're right. Let's hurry up."

"There's only the two of us for this entire week, and it's rather lonely, but we have to work hard."

"Yes, then I'll leave myself in your hands."

Notification of suspension

All second year male students of Fumitzuki Gakuen, 149 in total.

The above students will be suspended from school for 1 week.

Fumitzuki Gakuen Principal Todou Kaoru

Didn't think too much, I just did it on a moment of impulse.

Now I'm really regretting it.

~Taken from a certain student's letter of regret~

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