Chapter 860 Where Would I Be Without Your Good Advice?
Suzanne felt envious. She said to Xania, "You give such good advice. Damn, you're good at this! To be honest, I wanna be just like Susan. Look at her. Look at that blissful expression on her face. How can I let go and get that look on MY face? I'm so much more uptight than her to begin with. What's wrong with me?"
Xania pointed out, "You already talked to me about this earlier, but I never got around to giving you my thoughts, did I? Let's review. You're having control issues. You just can't seem to let go completely to achieve total sexual orgasmic release. And you said that on the rare occasions when you do, you're afraid of losing yourself in a submissive way to Alan."
Suzanne nodded. "Yes. Yes. Exactly. Susan's in her happy place right now. Let's go for a little walk and leave her in peace."
"Good idea."
They both got up, while Susan continued to lie there with her eyes closed. She wasn't sleeping exactly, but she was in a dreamland, fantasizing about her hopeful future.
Suzanne didn't want to go for a big walk; she just wanted to get away from Susan so she could talk to Xania freely. They slowly walked to the other side of the pool. "Now that you've spent some time around the house, can't you see the problem? Everybody gets carried away."
Xania nodded.
Suzanne continued, "You know me. I'm a strong woman. I use my wiles, charm, and looks to have any man eating out of the palm of my hand. But with Alan, it's different. God, I love him! I really do. He makes me weak in my knees. Just looking at him sets my heart racing. And that was BEFORE he proved himself to be a naturally talented cocksman. With the subservient attitude going around, sometimes I get caught up in that too. Frequently, in fact. More and more, I just want to bask... in the joy... of, of... serving his cock! Does that sound crazy?!"
Xania replied, "Not at all. I can relate. Last night, at one point, I was shouting for him to tame me with his big dick. I don't know if 'taming' is an actual thing, but I felt even more that way this morning, this sense of being sexually dominated and actually really enjoying it. You know I'm not much of a submissive type, so that's very curious. But Alan played me like a fiddle by tying me up and tricking me, and so much more. There's a crazy vibe around this house. Maybe it has to do with the smell, or the constant sight of incredibly gorgeous, naked or scantily dressed women. I don't know."
"Those things factor in, for sure," Suzanne said. "And he has a knack, knowing just what to do to send a woman into seventh heaven."
Xania nodded.
The two of them continued to slowly walk in circles on the other side of the pool.
Xania said, "If I were here for weeks at a time, I imagine it would take all of my willpower not to give in to Alan's domination too. It just seems like the thing to do, especially when everyone else is doing it and feeling so joyous as a result. Like you, I don't want to give in. That's not my natural way. I admire how happy Susan and Katherine are, but I'm just not the submissive type. I'd fight it."
"Exactly!" Suzanne enthused, glad to talk to someone who could relate to her situation. "I'm fighting it. But it's so hard, because Alan is so damn incredible! I mean, I thought he was just an inexperienced kid, but the things he does to me! I hyped him up to the nth degree, mostly for Susan's sake, but it's kind of become a self-fulfilling prophesy. The more women who fall under his spell, and the more impressive they are, the more tempting and powerful he becomes somehow. He hardly even has to do anything at this point, because even just the hype gets us all so worked up. I kind of created a monster."
"'A monster?'"
"Well, not a monster. That's just the saying. And I don't regret it. I'm happy with the way things are going, actually, just so long as I don't turn into Susan or Brenda eventually. I love this harem that's developing, overall. But how can even a dominant woman like me resist his sexual power? It takes all my willpower. That's why I can't give in and enjoy myself as much, to reach the same ecstatic heights that they do."
Suzanne sighed in frustration as she thought about her schemes and her secrets. She particularly thought about her greatest secret, the way she had initiated the six-times-a-day ruse and her constant concern that it would come out. Even thinking about those things caused her to tense up.
Xania however, remained undeterred. "That's where you're wrong. Letting go is not the same as submitting to another. I think I have greater immunity against the strangely-alluring submissive vibe that's taken hold here, because I can tell the difference. Here. Let me teach you." She stopped walking and faced Suzanne.
"But how?" Suzanne asked plaintively.
"First of all, you have to be as honest with yourself as you can. We all have secrets, and that's fine. But many of them are secrets of pride. Part of letting go is clearing your head of petty worries. Look at Susan. Do you think she's letting a million little things stress her out right now?"
Suzanne looked over at her best friend on the other side of the pool. Susan was lying face up in her lounge chair, naked to the world and totally blissed out. Her legs were slightly spread and her arms were akimbo. She looked like she'd just been royally fucked, even though they'd all just been casually playing around. She wore an enormous smile.
Suzanne felt her envy rise again. She knew that Susan often looked like that, completely blissed out and smiling, even when she hadn't had a recent climax. "Okay. I'll admit it. It's my CUNT. I don't go on and on about it like Susan does, but my cunt controls me in the same way Susan's tits and ass control her. Okay? I mean, it's embarrassing to know that half of what I do is because my cunt demands it of me. If you only knew some of the things I've done to keep it happy..."
Again, the six-times-a-day secret came to the fore of her mind. Slashing the tires of the scoutmaster's van the week before popped into her head too. But she forced those unpleasant memories away as quickly as they came up.
"Hey, remember who you're talking to here!" Xania exclaimed, reaching for Suzanne's pussy. "I knew that already. Don't you remember all the fun we used to have back in college? Your cunt was practically insatiable!"
However, Suzanne closed her legs, using her hand to keep Xania at bay, forcing Xania to withdraw. "No! Don't touch! It's too sensitive. And I don't just mean now. Feeding it just makes it hungrier! A couple of weeks ago, I tried wearing one of those internal dildos all day long, and I damn near turned into a blithering idiot. I was much better off before Sweetie started fucking me. That woke up my cunt, and now it's taking over my life. I fear I'm losing control!"
Xania pointed out, "There's the control issue again. What's so bad about losing control?"
"I don't want to end up worshiping Alan like he's some kind of god. I don't even want to be fully 'tamed' by him. I mean, I love him heart and soul, but I'm a modern woman. I love the harem, I love being a part of this sisterhood of Alan's lovers that's developing, but I don't want to be just... like... nothing more than another one of his sex slaves!"
She added, more to herself than Xania, "I never thought it would come to this. I thought I could stay on top of things. I figured something like a harem would develop, but I thought that I'd be the one on top, controlling it!" She flopped her arms up and down in helpless frustration. "Things are slipping away from me, and I don't know what happened!"
Xania pointed out, "You may not be in complete control of everything, but I know you. You're still the same Suzanne I've always known: the clever, creative, 'can-do' woman. I'm no harem expert, but I suppose it's only natural that the one guy is in charge. But who will be the real power behind the scenes? You will!"
Suzanne frowned uncertainly. "You think?"
"Sure. You can do that AND go wild on his cock to your heart's delight too. Even if you completely 'succumb' and become a 'fuck toy' or whatever the submissive lingo here is, your natural take-charge personality will still come to the fore again before long. Alan's not a controlling kind of guy, I can tell. Sure, he finds the sexual submission thing highly arousing, but beyond that, doesn't he pretty much look to you on what to do?"
"He does," Suzanne said with relief. She felt better already.
"So my advice is to go wild in the bedroom. Give in to your submissive urge, if it feels good. Let go, completely! Then be your usual strong Suzanne self the rest of the time. You're not going to turn into Susan or Brenda, because you're not them. You're you. Their personalities didn't change, not really. To be honest, I don't think there's true 'taming' here at all. Clearly, both of them had untapped and repressed submissive aspects of their personalities, and Alan's 'taming' magic was that he was able to bring that to the fore."
She continued, "Chances are, a lot of women have a submissive side, including you and me. But that's just one side. You're a particularly complicated and multifaceted woman, Suzanne. Alan has brought your submissive side forward too, and now he's working on me. I consider that a good thing. It's gonna result in a lot of really hot sex! But in the end, we're still the same basic people we always were. You know what I mean?"
"I do," Suzanne replied. "And thank God for that! This is such a relief, talking to you. Thanks! Where would I be without your good advice?"
Xania smiled. "Suzanne, here's something to remember. You have great friends. I'd like to think that I can be a really good friend in your life again, and give you help and advice when you need it. But even if I'm out of the picture, you have your best friends here. Alan, Katherine, and Susan, and of course your lovely daughter Amy. Trust them. Let them know what you want and what you DON'T want. If you go too far on something, they'll be right there to help you. You're in a circle of love."
She went on, "Frankly, I'm very envious. Alan loves YOU, the feisty Suzanne he grew up with. Yes, he loves dominating your sexy ass in the bedroom, but he doesn't want you to become some submissive zombie. Far from it! He needs you as you are, and relies on you to be that way."
Suzanne said, "That's true. He keeps telling Angel that he wants her to be 'uppity,' not mindlessly submissive. As for me, I think he wants and expects me to be kind of the father figure for us all, and help keep his 'Bad Alan' tendencies in check."
"Exactly." Xania added, "Trust him, and the rest of your de facto family. It's like a team-building trust fall. Let go, and know they'll catch you. You don't have to always be the responsible one; you don't need to always mentally hold back. Look at Alan. He's as maxed out with sexual pleasure as a person can be, yet he still maintains a good grip on things. You have a strong will, Suzanne. You can do this. Just let yourself go totally, when the time is right, and you'll be able to experience the ultimate ecstasies with your loved ones."
"But how?!" Suzanne asked with exasperation.
"Let's do a little trust exercise right now. Come with me." Xania led Suzanne back around the pool to Susan.
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